Scattered Pictures
by Shirl
Summary: COMPLETED. My version of what happens when Seth returns from sailing. He's lost something vital his memory. How will it affect him and those around him ie. Ryan, Marissa & Summer? Major SS, Minor RM. PG13 for Language
1. Prologue: The Midnight Hour

Disclaimer: I don't own any part of the O.C. All rights belong to the Fox network.

A/N: I'm not sure if I'll be able to pull this off the way I want to, but I'd like to give it a shot. Although amnesia seems such a cliché and soap-operish, I thought it would be interesting to explore how it could affect Seth and in turn, everyone around him. I also don't know if anyone else has written a fic like this. If they have, I swear I haven't read it and this will be original.

I don't usually specifically ask for feedback, but I will on this first chapter. Please let me know if you like the amnesia idea or not. If enough people are interested, I will certainly continue. Honest opinions only, please. I promise not to be offended, no matter what you think :-)

* * *

The blaring ring of the telephone jolted Sandy Cohen out of slumber. Although a quick glance at the bedside clock radio told him it was 12:13 in the morning, he was instantly awake. Calls at this hour usually meant bad news. As he fumbled for the phone, he tried to control his quickening heart rate. It was probably a wrong number. Nothing to be worried about.

"Hello?"

"Yes, am I speaking with Mr. Cohen?" asked the male voice on the line.

Not a wrong number. "Yes."

"Are you a relation to a Seth Cohen?"

Oh God. Oh God. Oh God. Sandy clutched the receiver so tightly, he was surprised it didn't shatter in his hand. "Yes." His voice cracked slightly and he had to clear his throat. "I'm his father."

"Well, I'm glad I found the right Cohen. My name is Doctor Kane. I'm calling from the Harborview Medical Center in Seattle. Sir, your son was brought to our ER a couple of hours ago. He was involved in a boating accident. He's stabilized now but I think you should try to get down here as soon as possible."

"Yes. Yes, of course." Sandy blinked, as Kirsten had switched on her bedside lamp, bathing the room in a soft glow. "Uh, what's his condition?"

"As I said, he's stable," Dr. Kane said patiently.

"I know but what's happened to him? Head injury? Broken bones? What?"

"Mr. Cohen, it would be best to explain all that once you..."

"Just tell me!" Sandy interrupted vehemently. He barely felt Kirsten's hand on his shoulder.

A pause. "All right. No broken bones but he's sustained a head injury, yes. He has a fairly severe concussion and hasn't regained consciousness yet. We will be running some tests but that's all I can tell you at this point."

Sandy fell silent, closing his eyes briefly. He opened them when Kirsten shook his shoulder. Hard.

"Sandy, what is it?" she whispered, eyes huge and fearful.

Damn, he hadn't meant to be so inconsiderate. He patted her hand. "He's okay, honey."

"Mr. Cohen?" Dr. Kane questioned in his ear.

"Yeah, I'm here. Look, we'll try to be there in a few hours."

"Oh?" Dr. Kane sounded mildly surprised. "I know I said soon, but I assumed you probably wouldn't be able to catch a flight until later in the morning."

"Don't worry, we'll be there."

Sandy took down some more information from the doctor before hanging up. He then turned to his wife and repeated everything that he'd been told. By the time he got to the part about the concussion, her eyes were red from unshed tears.

"My poor baby," she murmured.

"Do you know anyone that can fly us down there?" Sandy asked, already getting out of bed and starting to get dressed. "Helicopter? Private plane?"

She sniffed once, tilting her head slightly to think. "No," she said finally. "But my father would."

Sandy grimaced. "Well, let's get daddy on the phone."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Marissa Cooper stretched, yawned, and flicked off the TV with the remote. Padding quietly across the room, she paused by the barstool, her eyes roaming over the endless bottles behind the bar. So many choices. Just one before she went to bed. It would help her sleep, she reasoned.

Her hand shook as she reached for the nearest bottle of vodka. Frowning, she clenched her fingers into a fist and held it against her chest. This was pathetic. She didn't need this. She was stronger than this.

Twirling around, she switched off the light and headed down the darkened hallway. The light was on in her stepfather's study. Burning the midnight oil again. Work. That's all that man cared about. Well, no, there was also that other hobby of trying to make her life a living hell.

Walking by, she caught the odd sight of the man hunched over his desk, his head cradled in both hands. Huh. Probably some business deal gone sour. She didn't think she'd made any noise, but Caleb Nichol's head rose up to look at her. They stared at each other for a moment. Something about this picture was odd. She was just about to walk away when it dawned on her. He was in his pyjamas. As if he'd already been in bed but then come down here for some reason. And he looked worried. She'd never seen that expression on his face before.

"Is everything okay?" she found herself asking. If his empire was crumbling, she wanted to be the first to know.

"Yes. No." He emitted a slight sigh. "That was Kiki on the phone. Seth is in a hospital in Seattle. I just found someone that can fly them down there."

Shocked, Marissa took a few steps into the study. "Is he okay?"

"Apparently he's stable. But he's got a concussion. Hasn't been conscious yet. I guess we'll know more once they get there."

"What happened?"

"Boating accident. I don't know the specifics." He slammed his palm against his desk, making her jump. "Damned boat! It's the most puny, unstable thing I've ever seen. I wanted to buy him a bigger boat but oh no, the lawyer wouldn't have it. Look where it's gotten my grandson now!"

"I...I'm sure he'll be okay." She couldn't believe she was giving reassurances to this man. With nothing left to say, she started retreating from the room.

She was just at the door when she heard him say, "Goodnight, Marissa."

"Goodnight," she replied over her shoulder.

Once up in her room, she flopped back on the bed. Although it had been brief, that had been the most pleasant conversation she'd had with Caleb since moving into this place. She refused to call it a home. Home was with her father. This monstrosity of a house was her prison.

Ryan. She wondered if he knew about Seth yet.

Fuck.

Rolling onto her stomach, she punched her pillow in frustration. Even with something like this, the first person she thought of was Ryan? She really was pathetic. Because he sure as hell wasn't thinking about her. It had been a month since he'd left – one month and three days, to be exact. And not once had he picked up the phone to call her. Sure, she understood why he'd gone. He was noble. He always did the right thing. Theresa's knight in shining armour. But would it have killed him to call and just say, 'hi, how's it going with you?' Nothing.

Hot tears leaked from the corners of her eyes and she swiped at them angrily. _Just stop it!_ She sat up in bed, legs crossed, until she willed herself to stop crying. There, that was better.

She didn't need him. She was just fine.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Summer Roberts groaned as she reached for the phone. She'd just started to drift off to sleep. "Hello?"

"Hi, it's me. Sorry, did I wake you?"

"Coop? No, it's okay." Summer sat back in bed, not bothering to turn on the light. "What's up?"

"I thought you should know. They found Seth. He's in a hospital in Seattle. But he's okay," the voice on the line added quickly. "I mean, his condition is supposed to be stable."

Summer didn't say a word as she listened to Coop ramble some more about what her stepfather had told her. So Cohen was alive. It sounded like the fool had almost gotten himself killed but he was alive. She had spent the last month pretending he had never existed, so it was no wonder she was a little slow in reacting to her friend's news.

"...Ryan, of all people. Can you believe it?"

She'd blanked out for a moment. "Sorry, what?"

"I'm just saying I can't get him out of my mind. I don't know what to do anymore. I know how pathetic I sound but..."

"Have you been drinking?" Summer cut in bluntly.

"No." The voice sounded much too indignant.

"You only start going on about Chino when you've knocked back a few. Either that or you think about him first and then you reach for the bottle."

Dead airspace ticked on for several stretched out seconds. "I just thought I'd be a good friend and tell you about Seth. I don't need a lecture from you."

Click.

Summer gently put the receiver back in its cradle and lied back down on the bed. She turned onto her side, then onto her back, then over to her other side. But it was no use. She was wide awake.

Seth freakin' Cohen. For the past month and three days, she'd both hated him and worried about him. Even when she tried to pretend he'd never entered her life at all, every time the phone rang, she wondered if it was he. So really, for all the superiority she'd just shown her best friend, she was no better than Coop. The only difference was, she didn't drown her sorrows in the drink. The surface Summer didn't care that her boyfriend had taken off and left her behind. She shopped. She partied. And everything was just fine, thank you very much. The inner Summer believed in the polished surface too. Well, most of the time. In the dark shadows of her room after midnight, the bubbles of sadness and worry sometimes burst through the outer layer. Those were the times that she cried herself to sleep or stared out the window, wondering where he was and how he was doing.

Head injury. Concussion. Those were scary, serious words. Had Coop said severe head injury? Summer couldn't remember.

With a heavy sigh, she turned over again and saw the glowing red numbers of her clock radio change to 12:59.


	2. Dealing With It

At approximately 4:30 a.m., Kirsten and Sandy arrived at Harborview. They went directly to the Emergency Room and asked about Seth at the admitting desk. Flipping through some files, the clerk handed Sandy a clipboard and asked him to fill out some paperwork.

"But what about our son?" Sandy asked. "Can we see him?"

"Please, just have a seat in the waiting area. Dr. Kane will be with you in a few minutes."

With reluctance, Kirsten followed Sandy to a row of plastic chairs and sat down. "Why won't she let us see him?" she wondered out loud. She had a sudden, nauseating thought. "Do you think...something's happened? That's why she can't tell us. Because he...he..."

Sandy squeezed her hand before picking up the pen attached to the clipboard. "No, I think it's just procedure, honey. Nothing's happened," he said soothingly.

Kirsten fell silent, clutching her purse in her lap. She tried to keep her mind blank but it was impossible. A chant of 'please let him be all right' filled her head, echoing over and over again. This marked the third time she'd been in the ER for Seth. The first time, he'd been eight and fallen off his bicycle. He'd come home with a cast on his arm. And when he was eleven, he'd caught a terrible stomach flu and couldn't stop throwing up. He'd vomit every ten or fifteen minutes and it had gone on for almost three hours. Worried about the continued strain on his poor body, they'd taken him to the ER. A shot of medication in the arm had eased his wrung out stomach.

She didn't think a cast or a needle was going to help her son this time. And she was scared to death.

"Mr. and Mrs. Cohen?"

They both stood up as a man who looked much too young to be a doctor came towards them, his hand extended. "I'm Dr. Marcus Kane."

After shaking hands, Kirsten blurted out, "Where's Seth?"

Hazel eyes turned to her kindly. "He's having a CT scan right now. I see you've started the paperwork. Once we have him admitted, we'll get him a room and I'll take you up myself." His gaze wandered beyond her shoulder towards the doors. "Excuse me for just a second."

She watched through the glass as the doctor ran outside to talk to someone. Seth was alive. That was the main thing she tried to concentrate on. Whatever happened now, they would deal with it.

After less than a minute, Dr. Kane approached them again with a tall man in uniform at his side. "Good timing. This is Coast Guard Lieutenant Harrison. He was part of the team that brought your son in."

The man nodded at them. "Yeah, it's been a rough shift. First your boy and now, I just brought in a guy that tried to drown himself. Anyway, Dr. Kane here asked that I tell you what happened to Seth. A larger boat rammed your son's boat around nine o'clock last night. Two men had been fishing and were returning to the harbour. They said they just didn't see your son in time. They were okay but their engine was damaged so they radioed us for help. They're good guys. Took care of Seth until we arrived at the scene."

"Was there any drinking involved?" Sandy asked.

"No. The SPD were called in too but there was no alcohol involved. Nothing reckless. It's been ruled an accident. I have a copy of their report as well as ours, if you'd like to see it."

Sandy hesitated but finally said, "No, that's okay. I know it's on file. I'm glad we had the opportunity to talk with you." He shook Lt. Harrison's hand. "Thanks."

Waiting until the Lieutenant was on his way, Kirsten asked, "How badly is he hurt? You only mentioned a head injury and concussion."

"He has some other lacerations and bruises but those are minor," Dr. Kane replied. "It's always the head injuries that worry us. There doesn't appear to be any damage to the spinal cord but we'll have to wait for results of more testing and for Seth to regain consciousness before we're sure."

"Oh God," Kirsten couldn't help moaning.

"Let's not jump to any conclusions yet," the doctor tried to reassure her. "It's much too early. Now, you'll have to excuse me for a while." He turned his gaze to Sandy. "Once you're finished with the papers, just let the clerk know. Then I can take you up."

As Sandy sat down again with the clipboard, Kirsten remained on her feet and started pacing. It didn't take long before he called out to her for assistance with some of Seth's medical history. Glad to have something productive to do, she sat down again and they pored over the questions together.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Other than the gentle whirring of various machines and the continual blip on the monitor that assured them Seth's heart was beating, the private room was silent. Kirsten sat by his bedside, stroking his hand. Sandy stood to the side and simply watched him. He sometimes paced edgily back and forth, but he always came back to Kirsten's side again.

They'd been waiting several hours now for someone to speak to them about Seth's condition. Dr. Kane told them a neurologist would go over the results of the CT scan with them.

Somewhat surprisingly, Seth looked perfectly fine. He had a bandage over one eyebrow and a couple more on his arms, but that was all that was visible. There was some swelling on his forehead but for the most part, he just seemed to be sleeping peacefully. On closer inspection, his hair was longer. And he looked thinner, as if he hadn't been eating properly these past few weeks.

Sandy felt a sharp stab of guilt. They had reported Seth's running away to the police, of course, but Kirsten had also wanted to hire a private detective to find him. They'd fought about it, but Sandy's point of view had eventually won out. In Seth's letter to them, he'd said that he just needed some time to be alone, far away from all the pressures closing in on him. He'd promised to call on a regular basis and that he'd be home eventually. At least before the start of school.

Although Sandy's initial reaction had been fury, he'd eventually calmed down and reasoned that this was perhaps just the thing his son needed. To be independent for a little while. It was certainly something he could understand, especially at Seth's age. And so he'd argued with his wife on his son's behalf and she'd grudgingly agreed to not to look for Seth.

In the month or so that he'd been gone, he'd only called twice. That didn't exactly live up to calling on a regular basis in Sandy's book but each time, Seth had sounded confident and happy. He hadn't had the heart to order him to come home. Not that Seth would have listened anyway. But now this accident had happened. All he ever wanted was his son to be happy but now he wished he had hired someone to drag Seth home, even if it had been kicking and screaming. At least he wouldn't be lying in this hospital bed right now.

There was a sharp rap on the door. An attractive woman with a no-nonsense air about her came in. "Mr. and Mrs. Cohen? I'm Dr. Arden. I've been looking over your son's test results." She came to stand before them with chart and notes in hand. "I hope you'll forgive my blunt nature. I just don't believe in sugar coating things."

"That's fine," Sandy acknowledged, trying to brace himself. "Just tell it like it is."

"All right. Seth has suffered from a blunt trauma to the head. There is some bleeding inside the brain but not an excessive amount and it has stopped. There is also swelling in the frontal lobe that concerns me but we've given him some medication to help reduce the intracranial pressure. The swelling should ease with time. We performed a spinal tap and it was clear. There's no infection and there doesn't appear to be any damage to the spinal cord. That's good. However, the bad news is that he hasn't regained consciousness yet. He doesn't seem to respond to outside stimuli. Pain, light, touch. We'll watch over him very closely for the next several hours but from his lack of response so far, I'm afraid it's most likely he's slipped into a coma."

Sandy's head swam from the overload of information. Kirsten was still seated and he kept his hand on her shoulder. As if reading his mind, Dr. Arden continued, "I know it's a lot to take in all at once. In my experience, a coma is sometimes the body's natural way of shutting down for a while to allow it to heal."

"Does he need surgery?" Kirsten asked in a small voice.

"No. As long as his condition doesn't worsen, I see no need for it."

Another question popped into Sandy's mind and he practically had to force his lips to form the words. "Do you think there's any brain damage?"

"It's impossible to tell at this point and I wouldn't even try to hazard a guess. The brain is a delicate but surprisingly strong organ. Sometimes, what seems to be only a minor injury results in brain damage and loss of function. I've seen other case that are more severe, certainly more so than Seth's case, and everything turns out to be just fine. We'll have to wait and see."

"Is that all we can do?" Kirsten asked. "Wait?"

"In a nutshell, yes. We'll make sure he's as comfortable as possible. Plenty of fluids. A physical therapist will work on his muscles to minimize atrophy. He'll only emerge from the coma when he's ready." She paused for emphasis, taking in each parent with a steady gaze. "But there is something you can do. I can see you love Seth very much. That's important. I encourage you to spend as much time as you can with him. Touch him. Talk to him. Let him know you're there. It will help."

Dr. Arden answered a few more questions and then left them alone in the room once more. Kirsten slowly got up from the chair, her eyes sliding just under Sandy's questioning gaze. "I'll be right back. I...need some water," she murmured.

Nodding, he took her place on the chair, taking hold of Seth's hand. He tried to speak but found he couldn't. No sound would emerge past the thickening lump that had grown in his throat. The pressure and ache of it caused tears to form in his eyes. Though he blinked furiously to try to force them back down, he was afraid he was going to lose it.

Getting to his feet quickly, the chair squeaked as it rocked back slightly. He strode into the hallway to look for Kirsten and spotted her at the far end of the corridor. She stood by the water cooler, one hand braced on the wall, the other loosely holding a crumpled paper cup. Tendrils of long hair had escaped her hastily done up ponytail, lending to her haggard appearance. She looked pale, exhausted, and was wracked with sobs that nearly had her doubled over. Her weeping was silent and it nearly tore his heart out.

"Kirsten..."

The cup dropped to the floor as she blindly launched herself into his arms, her crying more audible now, though muffled by his shirt. He held her, rubbed her back, and mumbled incoherent soothing sounds.

Finally calming down, she pulled back to look up at him. "I didn't want him to see me...hear me, fall apart like that."

"I know. Me too."

"Tell me he's going to be okay."

"He's alive. We have that much to be grateful for. We just have to believe he'll be okay." The guilt crept back to haunt him. "Do you blame me?" he had to ask.

She looked confused. "What do you mean?"

"If we had hired someone to find him this never..."

Placing a hand over his mouth, she cut him off. "No," she stated firmly. "You're not to blame." With the same hand, she gently wiped tears from his cheek that he hadn't known had fallen. "Don't do that to yourself. It was an accident. That's all. Okay?"

He took a breath and nodded. "Okay."

They held each other for another moment. Ready and composed once more, they walked back down the hall to watch over their son.

* * *

A/N: As you can see, I am going ahead with the story. Thanks to everyone for the feedback. You guys are great! Keep reading and reviewing. I hope to keep you entertained.


	3. He'll Hear You

Kirsten and Sandy each took a day to fly back to Newport to take care of their respective work matters and pick up some essentials from the house. Then it was back to Seattle, where they found a hotel room near the hospital. They spent the next week practically glued to Seth's bedside. As Dr. Arden had predicted, he'd fallen into a coma.

Kirsten told him funny stories from work that had happened over the last month and reminisced about family holidays they'd taken together. She focused on the positive and told him how much they'd missed him while he'd sailed away. She wanted to know all about his adventures and pleaded for him to wake up so he could tell her what he'd been doing for the past month. At one point, his eyes had opened for two seconds and then closed. Overjoyed, she'd shaken his arm and called his name but those deep brown eyes remained closed. Sandy had disappeared to get a coffee, so she'd run to the nurse's station to tell them her son was coming out of it. To her utter disappointment, they'd explained to her that it was just a spontaneous body movement and meant nothing. Not entirely convinced, she'd returned to his side and waited for something to happen again. Other than a jerk of his shoulder, which she'd witnessed before and had already been explained as an involuntary movement, the eyes didn't open again.

Sandy gave him messages from people that had been asking about him. Nana was doing well and sent her love. Julie and Caleb seemed happy, of all things, since their wedding and conveyed their wishes for a speedy recovery. Caleb had even come in for a short visit. They had, of course, gotten into an argument over the blame of Seth's condition falling on Sandy's shoulders. Because he still felt partially responsible, he hadn't put up much of a defense. But Kirsten had nearly taken her father's head off and ordered him out of the hospital unless he could keep a civil tongue. The whole unpleasant exchange had taken place outside of Seth's room, with the door firmly shut. Caleb had eventually calmed down but he'd left shortly afterwards anyway. Sandy had been surprised to hear from Marissa. She'd called to ask how Seth was doing and that she hoped he would be okay. That had been unexpected and sweet. When he'd mentioned that he was going to call Summer to let her know what had happened, Marissa had informed him that she already knew.

Since Ryan had returned to Chino, Sandy and Kirsten had agreed to give him space. They'd only called to check on him once. The second call to him had been about Seth's accident. Ryan had been dismayed and worried, immediately saying that he'd make his way up to Seattle. Sandy had put the brakes on that plan, trying to reassure him that Seth's condition was stabilizing and soon, they would be able to move him to a hospital in Newport. "You're sure he's going to be okay?" Ryan had asked. "Because, you know, if you even think he might...might not make it...I want to be there."

Sandy had assured him that Seth would indeed make it, as much for Ryan's sake as his own. When he'd asked how Theresa was doing, Ryan had been somewhat vague, simply saying that she was fine. Everything was fine. Sensing that Ryan didn't want to expand on the subject, he'd let it go. At least for now.

On day eight since the accident, Dr. Arden gave them the good news. Seth's vital signs were good, the swelling in his brain had receded and he was stable enough to be transported to Newport. It was time to move on.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Ryan slowly walked down the hall, feeling pulled in opposite directions. He wanted to see Seth and yet he didn't. He cared for the guy a lot and wanted to visit with him, of course. But he was afraid of what he'd find. He wasn't sure if Seth would just look like he was sleeping or if he was wasting away. But they'd been through a lot together. He owed him this much.

He knocked quietly on the open door. "Hi."

Sandy looked up and came to the door to greet him. "Hey." They embraced quickly with a seemingly casual pat on the other's back. "How are you?"

"Good," Ryan responded. "How are you holding up?"

"Okay."

"And Kirsten?"

Sandy paused ever so slightly. "Not quite as good but she's hanging in there. She's at the office today, pretending to get some work done."

Ryan stepped further into the room. "And uh, how's he doing?"

"The same. No change."

"How long has it been now? The coma?"

"Thirteen days."

Ryan felt himself nudged forward by Sandy's hand. "Don't be afraid. Just sit yourself down." He obeyed the direction, sitting stiffly on the chair by the bed. He hadn't quite brought himself to look at Seth directly yet. Instead, he was distracted by all the machines and wires hooked into the patient. "Stay as long or as little as you like. I know Seth would be glad you're here. Thanks for coming."

"Sure," Ryan mumbled.

"Just let him know you're here. He'll hear you. I'll leave you alone so you can talk. I need a bite to eat anyway so I'll be down in the cafeteria. Come and see me before you leave, okay?"

"Yeah, okay."

Fingers fidgeting in his lap, he finally looked at Seth and felt some relief. Apart from some obvious weight loss, it did seem like he was just sleeping. It took some time before he started speaking. Once he did, he couldn't seem to stop.

"Hey, buddy. It's me. Ryan. Sorry it's taken me a while to come and see you but things have been kind of hectic. You've really messed yourself up here, kid. I'm the one that's supposed to cause all the trouble, remember? Not you. So you need to snap out of this coma and come back to us." He shifted a little in the chair. "You probably want an update on what's been happening with me. Or then again, the last time I saw you, you made it pretty clear you couldn't care less that I was leaving. Maybe you're still mad at me. I don't know. If it's any consolation, I wish I hadn't gone back. I wish Theresa had never come into my life again. You're not gonna believe this, but the baby isn't mine. She's known for a month now that the baby is Eddie's. A timing thing. But she didn't tell me. That's what I can't stand. The lying. I could handle the fact that I'm not the real father. I could still do the right thing. But she lied about it." A bitter laugh escaped his lips as he hunched over. "And then, get this, she chooses Eddie anyway. They're getting back together. With counselling, of course. He's working on his anger issues. They fucking deserve each other, don't you think?"

Ryan blinked, running a hand through his hair. "Sorry, I didn't mean to lay this all out on you. I guess I...actually needed to get that out. I really wish you could talk to me, Seth. You'd say something ironic to make me laugh. Believe me, I haven't laughed since I left. I know you're resting, or whatever but please...wake up. It's just not the same without you here."

Running out of words at last, Ryan sat back in the chair. With a final pat on Seth's hand, he walked out and headed for the elevator. He needed to talk to Sandy about coming home.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

When Summer saw Ryan striding towards her, his gaze to the floor, she ducked to her right down another hallway. Pressed against the wall, she peeked around the corner and saw him step into an elevator.

When the coast was clear, she started down the hall again. She wasn't sure why she'd just done that. Instinct or something. She wasn't even sure why she was here at all. Seth had left her behind. He hadn't cared that she'd been hurt. He hadn't even tried to call her. Why should she still care about him?

She checked the numbers outside the rooms as she walked. This was the one. She stood uncertainly in the doorway and forced herself to take each step, closer to the bed. Her eyes came to focus on his face and she bit her lip. "What have you done, Cohen?" she whispered.

He looked surprisingly peaceful. His curls fanned around his face, longer than she'd ever seen them. His cheekbones were more defined than usual, making the fine features of his face more pronounced. She came even closer to the bed, until she was practically looming over him. She felt her anger ebbing away until nothing was left. Nothing but confusion. She started to reach out to brush a lock of hair out of his eyes but stopped, afraid to touch him. Her hand fell limply to her side. "I don't even know what to say to you. I hope you wake up. I hope you're all right. But don't expect me to come running back to you. You need to give me a reason. Wake up, Cohen. Just wake up!" She took a breath. "I've never...you're the first..." But her sentence trailed off into thin air. She was babbling. What was the point? Her being here didn't make any difference.

Backing away, she turned and fled. She pushed the down button repeatedly until the elevator doors opened. Relieved to find it empty, she jumped inside and waited until the doors slid shut before allowing herself to cry.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

If one had been watching over the patient carefully, one would have noticed the change in his breathing pattern and EEG monitor. The patient was slowly swimming his way out of the coma.

Hours later, opening his eyes, he found his world blurry and distorted. After less than a minute, his vision focused but he was still disoriented. Confused and alone. He said the first word that came to mind.

"Mommy?" Seth Cohen croaked.

* * *

A/N: To HOTTERTHNU: No, I'm definitely not a doctor. I'll take that as a compliment! I just wanted to sound somewhat realistic, so I did a little research on head injuries.

To Revi: Seth's being in Seattle is not really a plot point. To be honest, it just made it easier for me to write. There is reasoning behind it, which may or may not be revealed. Good question though!

Thanks to everyone again for the reviews. I'm a little overwhelmed by the enthusiastic response, which I wasn't quite expecting. But please don't kill me, no matter what happens! LOL!!


	4. Do You Remember?

"Can you wiggle your toes for me?"

Seth wiggled with all of his might, relieved to see his toes responding. Everything seemed to be in good working order. But he felt weak and lightheaded, even from his head being slightly inclined on the bed.

Dr. Singh smiled at him. "That's great. Now, I'm going to ask you some more questions. We're really going to start with the basics just to make sure everything's okay. And I'm going to make some notes. All right?"

"Sure."

Seth wasn't quite sure what was going on but he didn't want to let on how nervous he was. What was wrong with him? What was he doing here?

A pair of familiar faces burst into the room. "Oh, honey! Thank God!" Kirsten exclaimed, swooping down on him to embrace him tightly and kiss his cheek. He normally wouldn't allow such behaviour, but he supposed this occasion didn't fall into the normal category. He found himself hugging her back.

His father was next. A big hug and a murmuring of, "How are you doing, kiddo? It's good to see you awake."

Dr. Singh stood back patiently and waited for his parents to calm down. "You're just in time, Mr. and Mrs. Cohen. I'm about to ask your son some questions." He turned to Seth again. "Okay, here we go. What's your name?"

"Seth Cohen."

"Do you remember what happened to you?"

"I...no. Was I sick?"

"No. You were in a boating accident and injured your head. You've been in a coma for a little while. Do you remember the accident at all?"

Seth felt his palms beginning to sweat. Something was terribly wrong here. They were heading towards some scary revelation and he did not want to go there.

"Seth? Do you remember that?" Dr. Singh repeated.

"No."

"What's the last thing you remember?"

"Uh..." He strained his brain, trying desperately to recall something. Everything was so fuzzy. "Oh, yeah! I remember going to Disneyland. I threw up after the roller coaster." He looked to his parents for confirmation. They just stared back at him with worried expressions. "Am I making that up?" he asked. "I mean, we were there, right?"

"Yeah, we were there," Sandy replied.

"How old were you then?" Dr. Singh pressed on.

"Twelve, I think."

"And how old are you now?"

Good question. Seth realized he didn't know the answer. God, he really was messed up. "Um, thirteen?" he guessed. His gaze slid to his parents. Judging by their horrified expressions, that was the wrong answer. "Fourteen?"

Instead of confirming whether his wild guesses were right or wrong, Dr. Singh inquired, "Is that the last memory you have? Going to Disneyland?"

"Yeah, I guess. I don't know. What the hell is wrong with me? So how old am I?" His voice was rising but he couldn't help it. He was freaking himself out here.

"Okay, Seth, let's try to stay calm. It's not uncommon to have some memory loss with head injuries. We'll take this one step at a time." Dr. Singh placed his pen back in the pocket of his lab coat. "I think that's enough for now. You need to get some rest and we'll try to get some food into you. How does chicken broth sound?"

"Excellent," Seth replied, not bothering to hide the sarcasm.

Dr. Singh outstretched one arm towards his parents. "If I could speak to one of you for a moment..."

"I'll stay with Seth," Kirsten said, as Sandy and the doctor retreated to the hallway. She reached out to smooth back his hair. "You need a haircut."

"Forget the hair, Mom. How old am I?" he demanded.

She paused, seeming to stretch out the suspense to eternity. "Seventeen."

"Say what?" he yelped. He hadn't expected that. Not at all. Holy cripes.

"Don't worry. The memory loss is probably temporary. It'll come back to you soon. I'm just glad you're all right. We were so worried..."

"Mom, you're rambling," Seth cut in. That was usually his father's territory.

She gave him a sheepish smile. "Sorry. Other than...not remembering everything, do you feel okay?"

He shrugged. "I guess so." He couldn't seem to get past the memory thing. "There's just this weird...blank in my head. Empty space. I can't explain it. It's kind of...scary, actually."

She placed an arm around him. "I know. I can't even imagine. But we'll get through this together. Just concentrate on getting your strength back. Then we can go home and maybe that will help."

He perked up at that thought. "Yeah, maybe being in my own room will help. Do we still live in Newport?"

She chuckled. "I'm afraid so. Not that much has..." Her voice trailed off, as she suddenly looked pensive.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing."

His mother couldn't lie to save her life. "You were going to say, not much has changed. But obviously something has. So spill it."

"We'll talk about it later."

Her voice was firm and had that 'end of discussion' tone to it. He could never win against that one, so he reluctantly dropped the subject. With curiosity, he looked down at his seventeen-year- old body. His legs were definitely longer. Holding up his hand, his gaze travelled down the length of his arm. Jeez, he could definitely use some pumping up with the muscles. He obviously hadn't spent his teenage years doing anything useful like working out. Wait a minute...

"How long was I in this coma?" he asked.

"About two weeks."

"Oh." For a moment, he'd thought maybe he'd been out of it for a few years and that would explain his scrawniness. No such luck. So he'd really lost five years worth of memories. Charming. "Do you have a mirror? I want to see what I look like. God, I hope I don't have acne."

She laughed and reached into her purse, handing him her compact. He perused his image closely. His skin was good, thankfully. A bit on the pale side. Long eyelashes. Even longer hair. "I look like a girl."

"You do not!" she protested. But she was laughing at him.

"I do too. How could you let me grow my hair this long?"

"Well, I haven't seen you in a month," she stated defensively. Her eyes widened, as if she'd let something slip that she hadn't meant to.

He was puzzled by that remark. "What, like I was at camp or something?" Hold on, seventeen-year-old guys didn't go to camp, did they?

She sighed and rubbed his shoulder. "We've got a lot of catching up to do, honey."

* * *

A/N: Once again, wow, thanks for the reviews! They really make my day. Keep reading and I'll keep writing. That's the deal :-)


	5. Home Sweet Home

Seth tried to fight down his nervousness but he wasn't succeeding very well. He was going home. He should be happy. What was he nervous about?

It had been a couple of days since he'd woken up. Dr. Singh had given him the all clear. Apart from his general weakened state, he was good to go. Oh, but there was the little fact that he couldn't remember practically the last third of his life. At least he could still do the math. Maybe he should be grateful for that. He hadn't become a vegetable. If you were a vegetable, what kind of vegetable would you be?

"Here we are," Sandy announced, pulling into the driveway. "Home sweet home."

Seth climbed out of the vehicle. He was still a little wobbly but he tried to hide it. Although they were talking in low voices, he could hear his parents' subdued discussion as they got out of the car.

"Isn't that...?" Sandy began.

"My father's car. Uh huh," Kirsten finished.

"Didn't you tell him...?"

"Not to come. Oh, yeah."

Seth stared at them with a mixture of annoyance and fascination. "How do you _do_ that?" With a shake of his head, he started walking up the path. When Sandy tried to assist him, he shook off the hand. "Don't, Dad. I'm fine."

Going through the front door, he heard a high-pitched voice floating from somewhere. "Oh, that must be them!" A group of people converged on him, but all he could see was a red-haired woman in heels and lots of make-up as she came flying towards him. A little frightened, he took a step backwards but that didn't stop the assault. She took hold of his head in both hands, kissed his cheek and strangled him in a hug. "Seth, welcome back!" She finally pulled away and continued to speak animatedly. "My God, you're just skin and bones. We'll have to fix that. You look confused, sweetie. You really don't remember me? It's Julie."

He took a good look at her face. Okay, he did remember her. Next-door neighbour. "Mrs. Cooper?"

"Right." She looked pleased. "Only it's Mrs. Nichols now."

Seth's gaze flickered to his grandfather, who gave him a small smile and patted his shoulder. "How are you, Seth?"

"Okay, I guess." He was having a hard time grasping this particular concept. "So you two are...?"

"Married, yes," Caleb filled in.

"Nobody told you?" Julie asked in an accusing tone, as she focused on Kirsten.

"We were going to, of course," Kirsten replied through narrowed eyes.

Seth was mildly surprised that daggers didn't come shooting out of her pupils, by the look she was giving her stepmother. Julie Nichols. Stepmom. He choked back a laugh at the thought. "But we didn't think you would be here," Kirsten continued. She now turned her pointed gaze towards her father.

"Julie thought it would be nice to welcome Seth back," he stated. "And I agreed."

"Hey, Seth."

The soft voice caught his attention and he turned to look at the tall, pretty girl that was smiling at him almost shyly. "Remember me?"

Mary. Marie. He snapped his fingers. "Marissa. Marissa Cooper."

She broke out into a grin. "That's right." Stepping closer, she gave him a quick hug. "I'm glad you're okay."

"You mean, except for the unfortunate memory loss?" He spoke without thinking and actually felt badly when she winced, looking embarrassed.

"Yeah, except for that," she said quietly.

Seth finally faced the last person that seemed to be hanging around the perimeter of the group. He looked terribly uncomfortable. Funny, that's exactly how Seth felt. "And correct me if I'm wrong, but you must be Ryan," he found himself saying.

"Yeah," Ryan confirmed. He came forward and made a move as if to hug Seth as well. Why not, almost everyone else had. But then he came to an awkward halt and held out his hand instead. Seth shook it, studying the guy. He did not remember Ryan Atwood at all. Zip. Nada. According to his parents, this was his best friend for the past year. His pseudo-brother. The main reason he'd taken off on some insane sailing trip. If he was all that important, why couldn't he recall a single thing about him?

"Okay," Sandy said, a little too loudly. "Now that we're all reacquainted, let's give Seth a chance to settle in." He hesitated and looked at his wife. "Should we...order some lunch, maybe?"

"Oh, I've already taken care of it," Julie spoke up brightly. "Everything's set up back there." Her gaze slid to Ryan. "We might be short one plate, though."

Seth didn't miss the biting iciness of her tone. Interesting.

"Thank you, Julie. You thought of everything." Kirsten flashed a fake smile. "Well, let's all relax, then."

Seth waved them on. "You go on ahead. I'm just gonna...check out my room."

"But you'll come down, won't you, Seth?" Julie asked.

"Yeah, later," he lied. He had no intention of being at the centre of this freakshow.

As everyone started moving off, he began to head for the stairs when his mother touched his arm. "Sorry, honey. Ryan was supposed to be the only one here."

"I know. It's not your fault."

"But you should eat something."

"Later."

"I could bring something to your room," she offered.

"Mom!" he exploded. "Stop fussing. I'm fine. Go have some brunch."

He ran for the stairs before she could have a chance to respond to his outburst. Safe in his room at last, he shut the door behind him. He stood there with his back against the door for a while, taking in the view and waiting for his memory to come whooshing back to him. But it didn't happen. Weird. Everything was just so damned weird. He slowly began to walk around, picking things up and putting them back down again. The funny thing was, he couldn't seem to remember exactly what his room had been like. It made everything strange yet familiar, like Alice down the rabbit hole. The posters on the wall were definitely different. He didn't recognize any of them. Comic books were strewn around haphazardly. Man, he still liked comics? He pressed 'play' on the stereo and jumped a foot in the air when the cacophony of sounds threatened to implode his eardrums. Fumbling for the 'stop' button, he was enveloped in silence once more, heart beating erratically. Nice. Released from the hospital, only to die of a heart attack at home.

He sat on the edge of his bed and finally spied something familiar on the bedside table. A plastic horse. Captain Oats. He still had _that_? And it wasn't like it was thrown in some dark corner of his closet; it was on prominent display right beside his bed. Like it was still important to him.

Closing his eyes, he flopped backwards and bounced slightly on the mattress. "Please, God. Don't let my life be as pathetic as I think it might be. Thank you."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Marissa was currently fighting a war with her emotions. Half of her was rejoicing the fact that Ryan was back with the Cohens and thus back in Newport. She wanted to throw her arms around him and kiss those amazing lips. The other half was warning her to calm down and play it cool. He had ignored her for far too long. She was still angry about that. She was, however, glad that she had chosen to wear a new dress. It was white, with tiny embroidered flowers and made of a soft material that made her feel feminine.

Julie had set up the food buffet-style. Marissa went along and filled up her plate. When she reached the end, she saw Ryan standing with a drink in one hand, plate in the other, looking as if he didn't know what to do next.

"Want to go sit outside?" she asked.

He smiled, looking a little relieved. "Sure."

"Marissa, where are you going?"

She halted at her mother's demanding voice. "We're just going outside to eat." Her back was to Julie, so she felt safe in rolling her eyes at Ryan. He pretended not to notice.

"But it's...too hot out today. You should stay inside."

Her mother was _so _transparent. She'd been giving Ryan the cold shoulder since they'd arrived. "I don't care. I want to get some air," she stated.

They went outside and found a shady spot to sit down. It really was quite warm today, but there was a nice breeze that kept it from being too stifling.

There was so much she wanted to say and ask but she didn't know where to start. She concentrated on eating her salad first and then buttered her roll before speaking. "So, do you think Seth is going to come down?"

"I doubt it," Ryan replied. "Would you?"

"No, I suppose not. My mother set up this whole ambush. Sorry." When he didn't comment, she went on. "That was pretty weird back there, huh. With Seth not remembering things."

"Very weird. He was looking at me like I was a stranger. I guess I was to him. He remembered you, though."

"Well, Caleb said it's the last few years he can't remember. I lived next door to him for practically forever. Funny, though. Until last year, I didn't even think he knew my name. I guess he did. We just never talked."

"So, uh, how are things with you and Caleb?"

She pushed around some pasta with her fork. "Fine, I guess. We pretty much just stay out of each other's way."

"And your dad?"

"He's good. Still with Hailey. I like her, actually. And she makes my dad happy." She chewed thoughtfully, trying not to rush ahead. But she couldn't stand it any longer. She just had to know what happened in Chino. "So, you said you've moved back here. Is it because of Seth?"

He put down his fork and sat up a little straighter. "No. It's over with Theresa. She's back with Eddie."

Easy, Marissa. Don't look too happy. "Oh. And the baby?"

"Not mine."

She watched his expression carefully. "You sound...upset. Are you sorry the baby's not yours?"

"Not exactly. I mean, I did kind of get used to the idea of being a father. I think I could be a good one." He gestured towards the pool and house. "I couldn't give the kid anything like this but I would have taken care of him. Or her. The kid would've had a better life than I did, anyway. But I guess I'm mostly relieved. It's, uh, it's good to be back."

His speech touched and softened her heart. But she still had to know. "Why didn't you ever call me, Ryan? Didn't you...wonder how I was?" she asked, her voice small.

"I did call you. Once."

"You did?"

"Yeah, about a week after I left. Your mom answered..."

"My mother!" she burst out, cutting him off. "I knew it! God, I _hate_ her."

He held out a hand towards her. "Whoa, Marissa, calm down. You weren't home, okay? Your mom and I talked, sort of, and we agreed it would be better if I didn't call at all. If the baby was mine, I was going to start a new life with Theresa. It wouldn't have been fair of me to keep you hanging on."

"But...you agreed with my mother, like it was some sort of arrangement?" She could feel herself getting angry again, no matter how hard she tried to push the emotion aside.

"I wouldn't say 'arrangement'. Okay, she suggested it, but I thought she was right too. I thought I was doing the right thing. Shit." He ran a hand over his face. "Every time I think I'm doing the right thing, it ends up blowing up in my face."

Great, now he was upset too. She made a decision. What she hoped was a mature decision. "Let's just stop right here. Let's call a truce and...and start with a clean slate. Can we do that?"

She held her breath and didn't let it go until he nodded. "Yeah," he agreed. "A fresh start."

"Right." She gave him a tentative smile. "We'll just take it slow and see what happens. We've got another month and a half of summer left." Her smile faded a little. "Poor Seth. We have to help him."

He gulped some lemonade. "How?"

"I don't know. We'll think of something." She paused. "Ryan?"

"Mmm hmm?"

"Welcome home."

* * *

A/N: Ryan's back where he belongs. Yea! Thank you for those reviews. I'm really thrilled you're all enjoying this so much.


	6. Summer Threads

Summer hugged the small, heart-shaped pillow closer to her chest. She was sitting on her bed and chatting on the phone with Marissa. She was currently listening to her friend's tale of what had happened at the Cohens' home several days ago.

"You're sure this whole amnesia thing is real and not some ploy to get a little sympathy?" she asked.

"What? Of course it's real. How could you say that?" Marissa shot back, sounding shocked.

"Well, come on! Who the hell gets amnesia? It's like some plot from 'The Valley' or something."

"It's real," Marissa assured her. "You should have seen him, Sum. It was pretty freaky. He looked so lost."

Summer gave it some more thought. "Yeah, it must be real. He so sucks at lying. He could never pull something like that off."

She had been relieved to know that Seth had emerged from the coma. Apparently, it had happened the same day she'd gone to visit him in the hospital. Not for hours later, mind you, but still. She secretly liked to think that she'd been the key to snapping him out of it. He must have heard her after all. But this memory loss twist had her baffled. "So he remembered you. And your mom. But not Chino."

"Right."

"And he didn't mention me?"

Summer heard an exasperated sound. "I told you, he barely said two words to everyone before he hid in his room. He never came down again. My mother was furious, of course, even though she tried to hide it."

"You don't think he's forgotten me, do you?"

"Um...probably not. I think he remembered me because we were neighbours for so long. But he's been in love with you since before he was born, right? So how could he forget you?"

"Yeah. 'Cause I'm unforgettable."

Summer knew that sounded smug but she needed the reassurance. It was bad enough that Seth had sailed off into the sunset. It was unthinkable that he wouldn't remember her.

"So when are you going to see him?" Marissa asked.

"Soon."

"When?"

"_Soon_."

"Why are you stalling?"

Summer was crushing the pillow so tightly against herself, she couldn't breathe properly. She loosened her grip slightly.

"I don't know," she finally replied.

But she did know. Right now, she had her anger and resentment to keep her going. Keep her strong. After seeing Seth in his hospital room, she'd totally lost it in the elevator. Bawled like a baby. She _never_ cried over boys. She made _them_ cry. So why was it that Seth Cohen had such power over her? She was afraid of breaking down again in front of him. That would hurt too much.

Especially if he had forgotten her.

"So what's happening with you and Chino?" she asked.

"You're changing the subject," Marissa pointed out wryly.

"Yeah, so? I know you want to tell me."

Summer listened patiently as Marissa told her all about Ryan's miraculous return to Newport. She was sincerely happy for Coop. As much as she hated to admit it, Chino had grown on her. Perhaps now, all would be right in her friend's universe.

Summer's universe, however, was severely screwed up. And it was all Cohen's fault.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Ryan tossed aside the book he'd been reading and answered his cell phone. "Hello?"

"Chino, hey!"

He was surprised to hear the familiar voice. "Summer?"

"Yeah, it's me. I just wanted to say howdy and welcome back."

He settled back into the chair again. "Right. What do you really want?"

"Can't a girl just call up a friend to say hi without the friend getting all suspicious?"

"Sure. So what do you want?"

"Fine. I want to know what Cohen's been up to. Has he mentioned me at all?"

"Nope. But then again, I've barely spoken to the guy. Or I should say, he's barely spoken to me."

"Really."

"Yeah. It's been kind of...awkward around here." That was the understatement of the year. But he didn't feel like hashing over all the details with her. "Why don't you come and see him for yourself?"

"I will. I _will_." She almost sounded like she was trying to convince herself. "You're sure he hasn't mentioned me?"

"Yes, I'm sure, Summer. Not to me, anyway."

She sounded truly disappointed. "Okay. Well, I have to go. Bye."

The connection was abruptly severed. With a shake of his head, he snapped the phone shut. Nice to know some things hadn't changed around here. Summer was as self-centered as always.

Seth had been avoiding him like the plague. Since coming home from the hospital, he'd basically shut himself in his room. The only time Ryan saw him was during meals and even then, Seth barely spoke. The mood was always strained, even though Sandy and Kirsten did their best to keep the discussions flowing. Ryan had to admit, he hadn't done much to keep up his end of the conversations. He simply didn't feel like talking either. Whenever Seth did venture to say something, it was usually brief and snappish. None of his memory was coming back and it was obviously weighing heavily on him. Ryan supposed he couldn't blame the guy for being in a foul mood. But unless the memories started coming back soon, it was going to be a long summer.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Seth stood on the deck, looking over at the pool house. What was he waiting for? He should just go over to Ryan and ask him. But still, he hesitated. He didn't know Ryan. He didn't even like Ryan. Well, that wasn't quite true. Since he didn't know the guy, he couldn't really make any claim to not liking him.

Then he had a different idea. He'd rather talk to someone he actually knew. Sort of knew, anyway. Sitting down on one of the deck chairs, he got out his cell phone. This handy gadget was an example of the daily bewilderments he faced. He knew what it was. He knew how to use it. He did not, however, remember how he'd come to possess it. Had it been a gift? Had he bought it himself? No clue.

Out of curiosity, he scrolled past the name he'd been looking for to see if another would come up. And look, there it was.

Summer Roberts.

She was just a phone call away.

He stared at the name for a few seconds more before hastily scrolling back up again to safer territory. He just wasn't ready for that yet.

"Hello?"

"Hi, Marissa? It's Seth."

"Hi! How are you?"

"Oh, you know. Just trying to figure out who the heck I am, that's all. Listen, are you still friends with Summer Roberts?"

"Yeah. She's my best friend. Why?"

He tried to sound casual but knew he was failing miserably. "Oh, I've been going through some stuff in my room and I found her picture. And she's programmed in my cell phone. I'm not, like, stalking her, am I?"

Marissa laughed loudly. "No, silly. You're going out with her. At least, you were until you took off sailing." She stopped suddenly, sounding cautious. "Hey, um, I don't know how much I should be saying, here. Did you even know about going sailing?"

"Yeah, yeah, my parents told me about that. They never mentioned Summer, though." What Marissa had just told him finally sunk in. "You mean, Summer's my girlfriend?"

"Yeah."

Seth took a deep breath to avoid fainting onto the deck. This was mind-boggling. The planets must have been misaligned for something this staggering to have happened.

"Seth? Are you still there?"

"Uh huh."

"So you remember her, right?"

"Sure. I've only been in love with her since before I was born." He heard Marissa giggle. "What?"

"Nothing. Go on."

"Well, I need you to explain everything to me. I never even _talked_ to Summer before. How did she end up being my girlfriend?"

"You know, I don't think I should be the one telling you about this. You should call her."

Just the thought of it scared him to death. "No way. Besides, I'm the one who miraculously survived a life and death situation, right? Why doesn't she call me?" He mulled that over for a moment. "Hey, yeah, why hasn't she called me?"

"She went to see you at the hospital," Marissa informed him.

"Really?" Huh. No one had mentioned that to him either. What else had his parents neglected to tell him? No mention of Summer. No mention of the former Mrs. Cooper being his new grandmother. They had, however, filled him in all about Ryan. It seemed like all he'd heard was how wonderful it was that Ryan had come into their lives. How thrilled they were to have him back where he belongs. They encouraged Seth to spend time with Ryan and get to know him again. The harder they pushed, the more he resisted. It was, perhaps, not the most mature way to be acting. But right now, he couldn't give a flying fuck about trying to be mature.

He turned his head, seeing movement out of the corner of his eye. The man himself was coming towards him. "I have to go," he said quickly. "Thanks, Marissa."

"Hey," Ryan greeted him.

Seth nodded. "Hey."

"So, uh, I was wondering if you want to go down to the pier? Maybe grab some lunch?"

"Nah. I'm not up for that." He was actually being truthful. Although he was gaining his strength back, the process was taking longer than he'd like.

"A round of video games then?"

"You don't strike me as the games kind of guy."

Ryan laughed softly. "It's grown on me. I actually missed it in Chino. I've gotten pretty good, you know. I learned from the best."

Seth stood up, only one destination in mind. His room. "I'm not exactly into fun and games right now. Some other time." He turned to go, only to find Ryan back in his face.

"Hey, would you cut me some slack here? I know I'm this complete stranger to you but I'd like to change that. We used to be really good friends, man. Won't you at least talk to me?"

Seth hesitated, feeling torn. Part of him appreciated Ryan's efforts. He really did. But he just wasn't up to it. Not yet. "Look, apparently you're this great guy and I know we were best buddies. But I'm just trying to figure things out for myself right now, okay? My parents are happy that you're here, so I'm happy that they're happy. Just...just give me some space."

"Okay," Ryan said simply.

Seth strode past him and retreated back to his room. He glanced at the photo of Summer that he'd found. Summer, his girlfriend. It didn't seem real. It defied comprehension. It was perhaps the scariest revelation that he'd had since waking from the coma. Thrilling, but scary. Like the roller coaster at Disneyland. He could only pray that when he finally came face-to-face with her, he wouldn't have the same physical reaction that he'd had to the roller coaster. Somehow, he didn't think Summer would find that very impressive.

* * *

A/N: Okay, it seems I need to ease some readers' concerns. First, let me try to explain Seth's memory loss the way I see it. He remembers everything that's happened the first twelve or so years of his life (that would explain his thought about Kirsten's rambling as "usually his father's territory"). He does NOT have the mental capacity of a twelve-year-old. So, for example, he will speak as the Seth we know today and still has the ability to carry on as normal in high school.

Now, on to the question of 'where is Summer'. This is most definitely a major S/S fic while R/M will play supporting roles. I don't know exactly how many chapters there will be but at this point, we're probably about one quarter of the way through the whole story. So please, I ask for your patience. I hope you're in this with me for the long haul. This is not an instant gratification fic and there won't be much fluff. Don't get me wrong...I love fluff too but that's not the tone of this story. There is actually a point to each chapter and hopefully you'll decide to see it through to the end. I do promise that the **next chapter** will feature S/S interaction.

Oh, and whoever wrote "Next Chapter"...that was actually pretty good! There, that's my review of your review. LOL! But alas, that's not exactly how it's going to pan out.

As always, thanks for the reviews and now, I'm going to stop my rambling. :-)


	7. A Boxed Life

Maybe no one was home. Summer stabbed the doorbell again with her index finger. She could hear the chimes reverberating inside the house. Just as she was about to give up, the door was flung open.

"Hi!" she exclaimed, a little too brightly.

Seth stared at her, his mouth slightly agape. He didn't say a word.

Oh my God, Coop somehow had it wrong. He didn't remember her at all. She felt her heart plunging while her stomach twisted into knots. "Uh...you got your hair cut. Wow, it's really...short," she stated nervously. He continued to regard her through wide brown eyes. She couldn't stand it. "Cohen. Speak!" she demanded.

He finally snapped out of his stupor. "Yeah, Summer, sorry...um, just a brain-dead moment there. I mean, I'm not really brain-dead from the coma or anything. I'm still relatively intelligent and apparently like to spew out big words to show off my fantastic vocabulary range. Not that I remember learning these gargantuan words but they must somehow still be stored in my brain so I can access them..."

Now it was her turn to stare at him, as she cut him off in mid-speech. "What the hell are you talking about?"

He attempted a laugh but it sounded like a cross between a whine and the braying of a donkey. "I have no idea."

He had said her name. That gave her renewed hope. "So, you do remember me?" she asked.

Seth seemed to have regained control of his senses, speaking a little more coherently. "Yeah. Nothing recent, but...you're Summer Roberts. I definitely remember you."

"Good." She felt herself relaxing a little. "Are you going to invite me in?"

He stepped back a bit. "Sorry, of course. Come in."

She walked by several large boxes on the floor, just to the right of the door. They were all overflowing with items. She only gave them a passing glance, but she noticed some CDs and books.

"Spring cleaning?" she commented.

"Something like that."

She automatically headed upstairs, with Seth trailing at her heels. Marching inside, she marvelled at the state of his room. It was a complete and utter mess. Clothes, CDs, comics, books and an assortment of other items were scattered all around. The walls looked odd and it took her a few seconds to realize why. They were bare of any posters.

As she surveyed the chaos, Seth was hastily clearing off a portion of his bed and a chair.

She would ask him what was going on here in a minute. There was something else she had to get out of the way first. "So, Cohen, other than the amnesia thing, is everything else okay? Physically, I mean."

He turned around to face her. "Yeah. I'm still a little tired but that's about it. Everything else is fine."

"Good."

Coming to stand within an inch of him, she tipped up on her toes and reached up with both hands, pulling his head down for a long, open-mouthed kiss. The kiss encompassed all her pent up emotions from the time he'd left town until this very moment. Thus, it was a slightly wild, bruising, and furious kiss. It was, perhaps, the hottest meeting of lips she'd ever experienced. Although he'd reacted stiffly at first, he'd soon started kissing her back, wrapping his arms around her. For all his lack of experience, he'd always been a great kisser. She finally disengaged herself and opened her eyes with a slight sigh. "That's for coming out of the coma okay."

She smiled sweetly. "And this..." With a dramatic pause, she smacked him across the face with the palm of her hand, feeling the skin itch with the sting of it. "...is for leaving town without having the guts to tell me to my face and just leaving a stupid note for me to read."

Cradling his cheek with one hand, he regarded her with a decidedly shocked expression. "Summer..."

She backed away and continued ranting. "Not only that, you didn't even call me. Not once! Do you know how worried I was about you? Do you get that? If anyone else had done that to me, he _so_ would have been history. We wouldn't be having this conversation. We most definitely would not be kissing. But you had to go and lose your memory. Now I can't even have the satisfaction of you grovelling at my feet and begging for my forgiveness because you don't remember any of this. Am I right?"

His mouth kept opening and closing like a wounded fish. "Uh."

Hands on hips, she tapped her foot. "Speak!"

He finally managed to string some words together. Barely. "Summer, I...I..."

That was about all he sputtered out before she noticed the tears welling in his eyes. Instant regret hit her over the head like a club. "Oh God. Don't do that. I'm sorry. Here, sit." She led him by the arm to the bed and they both sat down. "I didn't actually hurt you, did I?" His cheek was flushed pink, but then she realized that both sides were a rosy colour.

"No, just give me a second," he muttered. "I think I'm in shock or something. This is all very...intense."

"Sorry," she apologized again. "I did come on kind of strong. I can't help it."

She was relieved to see his tears had receded without actually falling. He now spoke in a relatively normal tone of voice. "Yeah, I seem to recall you were always into the drama. I guess I deserved that, even though I don't remember doing what I did. For what it's worth, I'm sorry anyway. I'm just, uh, a little overwhelmed with everything. Not just you. Everything. My life is so...so..."

"Fucked up?" she supplied helpfully.

He actually smiled at that, albeit weakly. "That about sums it up." Reaching out with one hand, he touched her hair, letting the silky strands slip through his fingers. "I can't believe you're really here. I know this sounds corny as hell but it's like some dream to me. In my scrambled brain, I've never even talked to you before. You were always this unattainable princess that I admired from afar. I don't know what happened to change all that and frankly, I don't even care right now. I could just sit here and look at you all day, but I guess that would be pretty boring for you."

Oh no. Now she felt a liquid fullness in her own eyes that threatened to spill over. She'd been so afraid of crying in front of him but for all the wrong reasons. She ducked her head slightly, blinking madly. "Allergies," she mumbled.

"Can I ask you something?"

She hesitated for a beat until she was sure she was in control of herself once more. "Shoot," she responded.

"It's been a couple of weeks since I've been home. Marissa told me you visited me at the hospital but...why haven't you called me or come to see me until now?"

Think fast. "Partly because I was still pissed off about the way you left. And partly because...I figured you needed some space. You know, to settle back in." Not bad. A white lie with some partial truth.

He was nodding thoughtfully and seemed to buy it. "I did need some space. I probably wouldn't have handled seeing you right away very well. Actually, I could have handled the kiss. The smacking thing would have landed me on my ass."

"I didn't hit you that hard," she protested, wishing she could curb her impulses sometimes.

But he was chuckling. "Kidding. Kidding!"

"So nothing is coming back to you at all?"

"Nope."

Behind that one simple word, she heard the ache of his frustration. Seth stood up and held out both arms. "That's why I'm clearing out this stuff. I can't stand to look at this crap that means nothing to me."

That didn't seem very logical to her. "But it's your stuff. It might help you remember..."

"That's just it, Summer! I've been going through everything for the last two weeks and it's not helping. I'm not remembering anything. It's like being in a stranger's room. I mean, some things are familiar, thank God, but I'm driving myself crazy."

"You're pushing yourself too hard," Summer told him gently. "I'm sure it seems like a long time to you but it's _only_ been two weeks. Give yourself a break."

"You sound like my mother."

"Usually, I would find a comment like that highly offensive. But since your mom's pretty cool, I'll forgive you," she retorted.

"I'm going to be a senior in high school and apparently I'm still enamoured with comics and video games. Doesn't that strike you as being somewhat pathetic?"

She spoke carefully, a trait that wasn't her usual style. "Um, I think pathetic might be too strong a word."

"What would you call it then?" he challenged.

"Cute?"

Rolling his eyes, he snapped, "I don't want to be cute."

She rose from the bed and cupped his face beneath the jaw with one hand, squeezing his cheeks. "It's too late for that. You're damned cute and there's nothing you can do about it."

He swatted her hand away. "I'm being serious here.

She was starting to get exasperated. "So am I. So you still like comics. Video games. Whatever. Who cares? We're teenagers. As long as you're not still sucking your thumb, I don't see what the big deal is."

"I guess." His tone was sullen as he looked around, his brow furrowed with some other emotion that she couldn't quite identify.

"Is there something else bothering you?" she had to ask. When he didn't reply, she thought back to the boxes she'd seen downstairs. "What are you planning to do with this stuff? Throw it out?"

He shrugged. "Toss it. Give it to charity. It doesn't matter."

"There were a lot of CDs in those boxes. Posters. There's nothing pathetic about liking music."

He didn't respond and the silence stretched out, unnerving her. A silent Seth seemed terribly unnatural and strange. "What's wrong?" she asked softly.

He finally began to talk slowly, as if he was still feeling his way, like a blind man through a maze. "It's like I've entered some alternate universe. Judging by all the CDs, posters...music should be important to me, right? But I've listened to every one of those CDs and they don't do anything for me. Same thing with the comics. Even the ones I remember. I've read through most of them but they're just pictures and words on a page. I'm not getting any joy out of anything. The most emotion I've felt since waking from this nightmare is when you kissed me. Even when you slapped me. I don't know what I like anymore. I don't know who I am. And it's scaring the shit out of me."

Summer didn't know what to say. The only thing she could think of to do was hold him. So she did. He hugged her back and the embrace felt crushing and desperate but she didn't complain. She simply waited until he started to pull away.

Looking up at him, she said solemnly, "We'll get through this. You'll see."

"We?" he questioned.

"Yes. We."

A door slammed downstairs and Summer heard voices. "Your parents?"

"Yeah. They went shopping. Groceries, I think."

"I guess this would be my cue to leave, huh?"

"You don't have to," he told her quickly. "Maybe you can stay for dinner?"

"Can't. My dad's having this big, important dinner at home with a bunch of other doctors or something. I promised to be there."

"Oh." His disappointment was obvious. "Okay."

They went downstairs and were greeted by Kirsten and Sandy. The Cohens were standing around the boxes by the door and perusing their contents.

Kirsten gestured towards the floor. "What's all this?" she asked her son.

"I'm just getting rid of some stuff."

"_Some_ stuff? This is a lot," she observed.

"Well, there's more to come," he informed her. "I don't care what you do with it. I'm sure you'll find some underprivileged children that are worthy enough for the collection."

Sandy's eyebrows were knitted together so closely, they formed a solid, winged line. "I don't get it. You've spent years amassing this stuff. You want to just give it away?"

"Yes! It's mine so I can do with it what I will, right? And my will is to have it gone. All of it."

"Seth, I think you're being a little hasty," Kirsten started to say.

But Seth interrupted her, his voice agitated. "No, Mom, I'm not being hasty. I'm being very rational and I've thought about it for a while. Have I asked you for one thing since I came home? No. Well, there was the tapioca but that doesn't count. I just want this stuff out of the house. I don't want to look at it anymore. Okay?"

He looked at Summer for the first time since they'd come downstairs. "Thanks for coming." Giving her a quick peck on the lips, he turned and ran for the stairs.

"Summer, do you know what's going on with him?" Sandy asked.

Unsure of how much she should reveal, she hesitated. She didn't want to betray his confidence but, she reasoned, he hadn't specifically asked her not to relay their conversation. Besides, his parents were worried about his strange behaviour and she couldn't blame them for that. "He told me that he's gone through all of this stuff. The music, the books. And basically he doesn't like any of it anymore. I think he, um, doesn't want the reminders around, you know? Like wanting a clean start."

"But to just throw it all away..." Kirsten's voice trailed off without finishing the thought.

Sandy regarded his wife. "Maybe this is what Dr. Singh was warning us about."

The look Kirsten gave him was filled with concern. "You think?"

"Yeah. Maybe that would explain the other things we've noticed too."

Summer's gaze flickered from one parent to the other, feeling her own concern growing. "What do you mean?"

Sandy launched into an explanation. "Dr. Singh, the neurologist at the hospital, told us that sometimes after head injuries, there could be changes in personality. It's a form of brain damage. Some people have problems with speech or mental abilities. Some lose sensations like hearing or smell. And, of course, there's memory loss. We already know about that one. Other than the amnesia, I'd really hoped that none of these other problems had affected Seth. Now I'm not so sure."

"Maybe he's just frustrated because he can't remember things," Summer suggested. "I'm sure it's not...brain damage."

"Maybe. I hope you're right," Sandy stated. "Even if it is, it's not always permanent."

It was too horrible to even consider. But she had to ask one more question. "You mentioned that you've noticed other things?"

"Well, he's been moody. Doesn't talk much. Not interested in watching TV or movies. I'm sure some of it is just a natural result of the accident. I didn't expect him to come home and be cheerful. But after what you told us and his wanting to toss all these boxes..." Sandy shook his head, his expression perplexed.

"I wish he would talk to Ryan," Kirsten said abruptly.

Her statement seemed to come out of nowhere and both Sandy and Summer gave her a bewildered look. "No, really," she stated defensively. "Sandy, don't you remember what it was like before you brought Ryan home?" She ticked off a list with her fingers. "Seth was moody. He wouldn't talk to us. He acted depressed. We were always worried about him because he didn't have any friends. Then Ryan came and Seth just...blossomed. They need to find each other again."

"I have to go," Summer blurted out. As she turned, her gaze downcast, she spotted a familiar brown hoof sticking out of the corner of one box. Bending down, she extracted one Captain Oats. She couldn't believe it had been abandoned too. "Do you mind if I keep this?"

"Not at all." Kirsten smiled, though her eyes were sad. "I'm glad he's going to a good home."

Before Summer could escape through the door, Sandy stopped her. "Hey, Summer." She swung back around to face him. "I'm sorry I didn't call you after the accident. I happened to speak to Marissa and she mentioned that she'd already told you about it."

"That's right."

"I didn't want you to think I was ignoring you."

"It's fine, Mr. Cohen," she assured him. "Don't worry about it."

"Okay. Come by and see Seth anytime. I'm glad he has someone to talk to."

He opened the door for her and she walked quickly to her car. Captain Oats was placed on the passenger seat and she leaned forward, resting her arms on the steering wheel, breathing deeply. She had managed to get out of there before saying something she would have regretted. About Ryan. Although she'd thought she'd made peace with it, she obviously hadn't. Not when the mention of his name on Kirsten's lips had sent a stab of resentment through her heart.

She'd tried to consider it logically. Seth and Ryan had been best friends. Just as she was with Marissa. The day of Julie's wedding, when Seth had told her how upset he was about Ryan returning to Chino, she'd understood. She would be devastated if Marissa ever moved away. And yet, when she'd gently reminded Seth that he still had her, he'd only replied that it wasn't the same. Her brain understood that logic but it still hurt. She wasn't enough. Even though she'd publicly declared for all to see at school that she chose him. Even though she'd defied her father's wishes and continued to see him. Not enough. Not enough to make him stay.

She didn't want to think about this anymore. She had to get her energy up to make an appearance at her father's dinner. Turning the ignition key, the engine roared to life and she found herself talking to the plastic horse. "Don't worry, Captain. I won't let some strange kid get his grubby hands on you. You're staying with me for a while."

* * *

A/N: So there you have it, the long awaited S/S interaction! I know I can't please everyone so I'm curious to know your thoughts. Don't be shy :-) Yes, I'm going to mess around with Seth a little bit. I can't have everything be A-okay just yet or the story would end right here.

Thank you again for those reviews. I appreciate each and every one.


	8. Parental Guidance

There was a sharp double rap on his door. Seth seriously considered ignoring it but he knew that would be useless. He recognized the knock. It belonged to his father. His mother's knock was always softer and she tended to knock in threes. "Come in," he said finally, before the second round of louder rapping could begin.

Sandy appeared and closed the door behind him. "Am I interrupting anything?" he asked.

Continuing to pick a few things off the floor, Seth said, "No, just cleaning up a bit."

"You're done with the purge, then?"

"Yeah, I think so. What's up?"

Sandy pulled up a chair for himself. "Sit down, Seth. We need to talk."

With great will power, Seth managed not to sigh out loud. Since more than an hour had passed after dinner, he thought he might have avoided it this time, but no such luck. It was down to The Talk. He dumped an armload of stuff onto his desk and plunked himself down on the bed. "Okay. I'm sitting."

"Your mother and I are worried about you." Sandy held up a hand when Seth opened his mouth to protest. "And don't say you're fine. It's obvious you're not. There's nothing wrong with that." He now placed the same hand against his own chest. "Frankly, I don't know how well I'd be handling this if I were in your shoes. I know this can't be easy for you. I can't even imagine. But we're a little concerned that you won't talk to either of us. We don't know what's going on with you. The last two weeks, you've just holed yourself up in your room. If Summer hadn't been here today, maybe we still wouldn't know what's been eating you. I know you've wanted your space and we've both tried to respect that but you need to start letting us in."

Seth gripped the edge of the bed, bunching the fabric between his fingers. "Can I say something here or is this a one-way conversation?"

Sandy gave him a tired look. "You know the answer to that. Go ahead."

"Why didn't you tell me about Summer? Since we're all about the talking and being open with each other, I find it exceedingly interesting that you neglected to tell me she's my girlfriend."

Sandy seemed to consider the question carefully. "It wasn't really a deliberate choice _not_ to tell you. In fact, I wasn't really sure if she was still your girlfriend. After we gave your letter to her, we never heard from Summer again. And she never came to the hospital, so I thought maybe things weren't so great between you."

Seth had to correct him on that. "She _did_ come to the hospital. Marissa told me."

"Oh." With a surprised look, Sandy tilted his head slightly. "I suppose that's possible. Anyway, the point is, I just wasn't sure what to say. I know you've liked her for a long time. If there was the possibility that you'd broken up, whether you'd done it in the letter or she'd decided after you'd left, I...I guess I just didn't know how to broach the subject. I'm sorry, maybe I should have said something."

Seth had to grudgingly admit that it would be tough to hold this one against his father. He could see the awkwardness of that situation. And while he was still dying to know exactly what had happened this past year to bring him and Summer together, he actually hoped his father didn't know all the details. "Point taken on that one," he conceded.

Sandy leaned forward, forearms resting on his thighs. "I want to preface what I'm going to say next with a warning. You may not like the idea, but give it a chance."

"Why not forget the whole thing?" Seth cut in hopefully. "Much more efficient."

But of course, his father pressed on. "We want you to consider seeing the therapist that Dr. Singh recommended."

"No."

"Seth, would you hear me out, please? This therapist has dealt with a lot of patients with memory loss. It might help you to talk to someone that has so much experience with this."

"No."

Sandy was visibly trying to hold his frustration in check. "You can't just give me a one-word answer. Come on, tell me what you're thinking."

"I'm thinking that I don't want to talk to a shrink. Talking to some weirdo isn't going to help me get my memory back. We already know it might come back or it might not. Either way, I'm gonna have to deal with it. And I'm doing just fine on my own."

"Okay, first of all, a therapist is not a weirdo. Second, I don't know if you're doing so fine."

Sandy got up from the chair and sat down next to him. Although Seth considered walking away, he wisely decided to stay put. "Why are you throwing your stuff away?" Sandy asked quietly.

Seth uncrossed the arms that he hadn't even realized had been crossed. He reverted back to gripping the edge of the bed cover. "It sounds like you talked to Summer today. What did she tell you?" he countered.

"Only that you've gone through your stuff and you don't like it anymore. You don't want the reminders around."

Bobbing his head, Seth stated, "Yeah, that's basically it." Giving his father a sidelong glance, he could see that more of an explanation was expected. "I don't know how to explain it, Dad."

"Just try."

Seth finally expelled that heavy sigh. "I can't. I'm just not liking this stuff anymore and I don't want to keep seeing it everyday. I figure this way, I can start clean. Maybe I'll find some other interests. Cooking, maybe. Or kung fu."

"Surfing?" Sandy piped up.

"Why not," Seth agreed. "What could be more Newport than surfing?"

His father snorted a little at that comment. "I'm not sure if I should be insulted by that or not. Are you sure you won't consider the therapist? Would it be so terrible?"

Seth rolled his eyes upwards, as if contemplating the question. "Hmmm, let me think. Why yes, I think it would be so terrible."

"You're still a minor, you know. We could insist on it."

"Dad!"

"But," Sandy said loudly. "We won't do that. Yet. You just have to promise to keep talking to us like you have right now. Don't shut us out. Is it a deal?"

Seth felt thoroughly backed into a corner but he supposed it wasn't all that bad. He could live with this compromise. "Deal," he muttered.

Sandy patted his knee. "Good man."

Seth expected the parental talk to be over at this point, but his father was making no move to leave. "There's one more thing," Sandy stated, sounding rather hesitant. "Your mother isn't so sure we should be telling you this, but in the interest of being so open with each other, I think you have a right to know. It might help to explain some of the things you've been going through. Or it may have nothing to do with it at all. It's hard to say, I think."

Seth regarded him through narrowed eyes. "So, yeah, I think we can safely say which side of the family I inherited my rambling gene from. Could you possibly say this in a more roundabout way?"

"Sorry. Well, you remember the tests that you went through after you came out of the coma. All of your senses are intact. You don't have any speech or language problems. Other than the amnesia, everything seems okay, right?"

"Right." Seth had no clue where this was leading but this wasn't a promising start.

"One thing we haven't mentioned to you is a discussion that Dr. Singh had with us. He advised that we should watch for changes in your personality. It happens sometimes after head injuries."

Starting to read between the lines, Seth slowly said, "Sooo...you think that's what's happening to me? My personality is changing?"

"Maybe. I don't know if anyone would have a cut and dried answer on that one. But I just wanted you to know it's a possibility. And if that's the case, it could be permanent or you could regain it back. Maybe somewhere in between."

Seth found himself embraced by one warm, strong arm. "I know this must be confusing as hell for you," his father continued. "But hang in there. Whatever happens, memory back or no, personality change or not, we love you anyway."

"Please, no mush," Seth mumbled. "I already had dessert."

Sandy laughed as he got to his feet. "Okay, the talk is over. Why don't you come down and watch some TV with us?"

"Maybe later."

The door was gently shut and Seth was left alone once more. Jeez, this had been some eventful day. Calling Summer crossed his mind but then he remembered her father's dinner. He didn't want to take the chance of interrupting.

Summer. That had been quite the whirlwind encounter today. In his mind, he recalled a bright, courageous, and fiery young girl with a zest for life that he'd always envied. It seemed she'd lost none of that spark.

Unconsciously, his fingers touched the curve of his lip. He could still feel the kiss. The memory of that moment alone would last him for quite a while.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Reality show. Reality show. Hey, another reality show.

Ryan flipped through a couple more stations before finally settling on one. At least for as long as it could hold his attention.

"Ryan?"

Startled, his head snapped up to meet Kirsten's gaze. "Sorry," she apologized. "Didn't mean to scare you."

He picked up the remote and hastily turned down the volume. "No, it's okay. Was it too loud?"

She waved a hand. "No, not at all. But I did want to talk to you for a minute."

His brain immediately went into high gear, going over things he'd done recently. Things he hadn't done. Before he could delve too far, he forced himself to stop. Old habits died hard. Wasn't that the saying? He reminded himself he was in the Cohen household.

After pressing the mute button on the remote, he slid over on the couch to make room. Kirsten sat gingerly beside him. "I was wondering if Seth has started talking to you yet?"

"No."

"Have you tried talking to him?"

"Yeah, a few times. But he asked me to give him space."

She nodded. "And I'm sure you've been respectful of that." She said this quietly, almost to herself.

"Shouldn't I be?" he asked, a little confused.

"Yes, of course. Just...Sandy and I have been worried about him. I think it would be helpful for Seth to get to know you again but I guess he has to do it on his own. When he's ready."

Ryan wasn't sure how to respond to that, so he said nothing and waited for her to continue. When she did, it wasn't what he'd been expecting. "You know, in all the fuss over Seth, I haven't talked to you lately. You've been quiet." She chuckled softly. "More quiet than usual, I mean. Is everything okay?"

"I'm fine," Ryan replied, hoping she'd take that at face value.

She regarded him closely. He felt an urge to start squirming but managed to keep still, all the while maintaining her steady gaze.

After an uncomfortable pause, she said, "You know you can talk to me or Sandy anytime. About anything. Right?"

"Yeah, sure."

"Okay."

She started to get up but he stopped her, surprising himself. "Kirsten?"

"Yes?"

He'd been thinking about this for the last few days. "Do you think it would help Seth if I left?"

Looking truly horrified, she stared at him. "What? No, I don't. Why would you think that?"

He shrugged, trying to act as if this was unimportant. Somehow, he didn't think he was fooling her one bit. "I just thought...I don't know. He kind of seems to resent me being here. I thought it might be easier for him."

"No." Her tone was firm and held no room for doubt. "You are family, Ryan. You belong here as much as Seth does. It will not help for you to leave." She was speaking crisply, enunciating each word. "Am I making myself clear?"

Her intensity was making him nervous. "Yeah, it's...it's clear."

"Promise me you're not going to...take off or something. Because it was really...really..." She turned her head slightly, as if she didn't want him to see such emotion. But it was plainly obvious in her voice. She got herself back under control and met his eyes again. "It was just hard for me when both you and Seth were gone. I have both of you back now and I want to keep it that way." She cleared her throat. "So, do I have that promise? No taking off."

"I promise."

"Good." She patted his hand lightly, three times. "Don't give up on him, Ryan. He'll come around."

She got up from the couch and left him in the semi-darkness of the room. Jesus. For a second, he had been sure she was going to start crying. He wouldn't have been able to handle that. So, it looked like he was staying. So much for that idea. And in all honesty, he was greatly relieved. He didn't want to leave. But he would have. For Seth.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Lounging on top of her bed, Summer idly flipped through the magazine. Hmmm, very cute skirt. She scanned the fine print to find out who the designer was.

"Summer?"

Her door was open and she looked up to see her father leaning on the doorframe. "I just wanted to say thank you for coming to dinner. I think it was a great success."

"Sure. No problem."

"Where were you earlier?" he asked casually. "You were almost late."

Lying was her first impulse but she saw no reason to. Yet. "At the Cohens."

He raised an eyebrow. "Oh? And how is the boy doing? What was his name again?"

"You know his name, Daddy," she murmured. "And he's doing okay, considering the amnesia."

"I see." Pause. "I assume you went to visit him as a concerned friend only."

Her index and middle fingers crossed of their own volition, unseen behind her magazine. "Concerned friend," she parroted.

"That's all?"

"That's all." The fingers remained tightly crossed.

"Good."

With her doorway empty once more, Summer tried to get back into the glossy pages in hand. Now, what had she been looking at? Oh yes, cute skirt. But instead, her gaze fell on Captain Oats. He was now standing proudly beside Princess Sparkles on her bedside table. An unlikely but striking couple.

When Seth had left on his solo sailing trip, she'd told her father that it was over between them. It had helped to ease her humiliation. He had never liked Seth and while she knew it wasn't fair of him to have formed that opinion over one disastrous lunch, it was a fact. She saw no reason to let him know it might not be so over yet. Mainly because even she didn't know where all this was leading. She hadn't lied to Seth today. She did intend to help him through this ordeal. She just wanted to be careful, that's all. Maybe everything would be wonderful and she would get a fairy tale ending with her prince. It could happen. But the cynical side of her warned her to take this slowly. Less chance of getting hurt that way.

Closing her eyes, she could still taste the intensity of the kiss. Damn, Cohen, anyway. Why did he have to be such a great kisser?

* * *

A/N: Sorry this update has taken so long. I swear, I have some valid excuses. This chapter, with the parental talks, wasn't going to originally exist. I thought I could work around it and just make reference to it. But it wasn't working so I had to back up and write this one out. Hope you like the result. In case you're thinking the next chapter should be really quick since it's partially written, that may not be the case. Hopefully I can salvage some of it, but it may very well be entirely tossed out. Oh, and I was also sick for several days with a lovely fever and, well, you don't want to know the details. Yes, I'm just asking for your sympathy now :-) One more thing. I promise to continue to update as quickly as possible but I think Real Life is going to start getting in the way. I don't think I can maintain the 2 or 3 days between updates that I had going in earlier chapters. Sorry for that in advance.

So, before this becomes the longest A/N in history, thanks for every review. A special thank you to the group from TWoP for their especially thoughtful and balanced reviews. Now, if someone could kindly tell me what TWoP is, I would be grateful. Really. I have no clue. LOL! Also, has the first name of Summer's father been revealed? I don't think it has but maybe I'm wrong.


	9. Circle Of Friends

Hand in hand with Summer, Seth strolled out through the theatre doors. Sometimes, he still got the urge to pinch himself. He was going out with Summer Roberts. He, Seth Cohen. With Summer Roberts. Seth and Summer. Summer and Seth. He never dreamed their names could be linked within the same phrase. Well, actually, he _had_ dreamed about it. But he'd never believed it could come true. When he thought about it too much, it made him nervous and slightly wigged out. So he tried to be nonchalant about the whole thing.

This was their first real date. They had spent most of the last few weeks simply talking. Mainly at his house but a couple times at the pier. He'd learned all about his first kiss with Summer. The fact that he had initiated the kiss still surprised him sometimes. That was way cool. And then he'd learned that at one point, he'd had _two_ girls fighting for his attention. It was so unfair that he couldn't remember any of it. More than a month had gone by now and he still had no sign of any memories returning. With school starting soon, he was slowly coming to the realization that he had no choice but to try to move forward with his life. Talking about the past was all well and good but he had to start living in the present. At least physically, he was feeling a lot stronger now and he'd gained some weight back. He didn't have to keep hiking his jeans up anymore.

They were making their way through the crowded lobby when Summer started waving to someone. "Oh look! It's Coop."

And Ryan too. Summer was calling her name and pulling Seth along. The other couple turned around, surprised to see them.

"Hi guys!" Marissa exclaimed. "Did you just come out of a movie?"

"Yeah," Summer replied. "What about you?"

"Just a few minutes ago. We were trying to decide what to do next. Hey, maybe you could join us." Marissa glanced at Ryan. "Would that be okay?"

"Yeah, if he...they want to," Ryan said, his gaze flickering quickly to Seth, then looking away.

Seth caught the uncertain look and felt a pang of guilt. "That would be great," he said. The enthusiasm was a little forced but only a little. It was, perhaps, time to get to know his friends.

"So what were you thinking of doing?" Summer asked.

"Well, there's Jamba Juice. Or the coffee place down the block," Marissa suggested.

Summer's eyes practically lit up. "Oooh yeah! The coffee place. They have a really yummy café mocha. Let's go there."

"Like you need caffeine," Seth teased her. "You're jumpy enough from the movie."

She hit his arm lightly. "Shut up."

Marissa laughed. "Why, what did you see?"

"The Village. It was _sooo_ moronic," Summer moaned dramatically. "I wanted to see The Notebook."

"That's what we saw." Marissa placed a hand on her chest, seeming to fight back tears. "God, it was so sad, Sum. I'm going to start crying again."

"Shouldn't we get going?" Ryan spoke up, with a semi roll of his eyes.

They started heading for the doors. The girls went on ahead, chattering about the respective films they'd seen. That left Seth and Ryan to bring up the rear.

"Chick flick?" Seth asked.

"Oh yeah," Ryan replied. "Marissa was all weepy but at least she was quiet. There was one woman who, I swear, was sobbing hysterically. You could hear her through the whole theatre. People were yelling at her to shut up but she just kept going."

Seth chuckled, amused. They were outside on the sidewalk now and he was strangely conscious of the fact that he was having a real conversation with Ryan. One that didn't start and end with, 'pass the salt, please.' He was an only child and hadn't liked the idea of sharing his home turf with someone else. But to his credit, Ryan had been nothing but quiet and unobtrusive. And he had abided with Seth's plea to give him some space, which he wholly appreciated. Unlike his parents, who were watching over him with an eagle eye.

They were parents. That was their job. He realized this but their constant hovering was not helping him. For once in his life, he was actually looking forward to the start of school. He had somehow fallen into this new circle of friends and while he still had the sense to be cautious, he knew he had to start making an effort to let them in. He had never made friends easily so this experience was all new to him.

He decided to start by telling Ryan about his Summer movie experience. "The Village was actually pretty good. Summer's just covering up for the fact that it scared her and she doesn't want to admit it. She had her face buried in my shirt a few times."

"Ahh," Ryan stated, in a voice of understanding. "Good choice of movie, then."

Seth grinned, his strategy revealed. "I like to think so."

"So you've been spending a lot of time with Summer. Everything's good?"

"Yeah, I think so. We're just getting, you know, caught up on things." He gave Ryan a glance from the corner of his eye. "How are things with you and Marissa?"

"Good. We're taking it slow. But it's good."

"Good."

Not exactly a whopping, in-depth conversation, but it was a beginning. They reached the café and went inside. It was busy and the aroma of coffee and desserts was a warm, inviting smell.

"Summer and I should save a table," Marissa said, perusing the menu on the chalkboard. "Can you order for us?"

"Sure," Ryan responded. "What do you want?"

"Um, I think I'll have a café mocha too."

"Any dessert?"

"I'm full from the popcorn. How about you, Sum?"

Summer was already at the counter, peering at the cakes and pastries inside the display case. "Everything looks good," she mused. She looked back at Marissa. "Want to share with me?"

Her friend shook her head. "No, I really am full."

"Cohen?"

He and Summer had shared a medium bag of popcorn too but he could eat a little cake. "Sure," he said. "Which one?"

"I can't decide. You pick." She started walking away with Marissa but then threw a final request over her shoulder. "Something with chocolate."

As Seth dug out his wallet, Ryan ordered for himself and Marissa. Then it was Seth's turn and he chose a decadent looking chocolate concoction, along with Summer's drink. In a spaced-out moment, he suddenly realized he wasn't sure if he liked coffee. It at least smelled good to him. His parents and sometimes Ryan had a cup of the java in the morning but he had never bothered.

"Hey Ryan. Do I even like coffee?"

"Yeah, but not flavoured. And not the fancy latté stuff. You should get decaf, though, or you'll be up all night," Ryan advised.

Seth ignored the look he was getting from the older woman behind the cash register. "So I'll have a medium decaf coffee with...um..."

"Two cream, two sugar," Ryan filled in.

"Right. What he said."

They moved down to the far end of the counter to wait for their order. "Thanks, man," Seth said gratefully. "I never know when this brain of mine is going to fail me."

After a few minutes, with trays in hand, they found the girls in a booth near the back. Summer's eyebrows shot up at the sight of the dessert. "Whoa, that's a freakishly huge piece!"

"I know." Seth put down the tray. "That's why I brought four forks."

Even Marissa, who had claimed to be full, happily plucked the shiny utensil from his hand. While sipping their coffees, they all dug into the cake. They chatted some more about the films they'd seen and lamented the fact that school was just around the corner.

"Any memories coming back yet, Seth?" Marissa ventured to ask.

"That's a big N-O on that front," he replied ruefully.

"I'm sorry." She gave him a sympathetic look, chewing slowly. "That must be so weird for you."

"Yeah. It's not as freaky as it was in the beginning. But it's still plenty weird."

"Is there something we can do to help you? I know you've been talking with Summer. And I thought about calling you sometimes but..." She hesitated, with a quick glance to Ryan. "I know you wanted some space so I wasn't sure. Maybe if we all hang out like we used to, something will come back to you."

Seth considered it, licking frosting from the tines of his fork. "Honestly? I doubt it. But yeah, I'm all for hanging out. So what did we usually do? Party central? Club hopping?"

"We mostly hung out in your living room and played video games," Summer deadpanned.

He stared at her, mouth agape in disbelief. "No. Seriously?"

She laughed. "You should see the look on your face, Cohen. I'm kidding. Well, actually, we did do that a lot, didn't we?" An expression of growing horror crept onto her face. "Ew, we _are _losers!"

"That's not all we did," Marissa interjected. "We went to parties. Sometimes. Not as much as we used to, but so what? I liked just hanging out at the beach."

"Or watching movies," Ryan spoke up.

"Yeah." Marissa nodded firmly. "Don't worry, Seth. We had fun and we will again. Right, Summer?"

"Whatever." Summer still seemed to be recovering from the fact that she'd spent so much time exercising her hand-eye coordination. "But we should party more this year. It's our senior year."

"It's the year before college," Ryan pointed out.

Seth almost laughed at how prim and proper that statement sounded but he managed to hold back. Apparently, he wasn't the only one with that thought as Ryan looked around the table and tried to defend himself. "What? I'm just saying it probably shouldn't be party hearty all the time."

"Dr. Kim would be so proud," Summer said, her voice dripping sarcasm. Ryan chose not to respond to her dig, other than flashing her a dirty look.

Seth had a sudden thought. "Hey, what about the last weekend before school? Did we hit the ol' TJ? I wouldn't mind doing that this year."

He was answered by a round of complete silence. Looking from one uncomfortable face to the other, he wondered what nerve he had hit. "What? It's still there, isn't it? Don't tell me it was obliterated by some massive hurricane in the last five years."

Summer found her voice first. "We went last year but, uh..."

Marissa completed her friend's sentence. "I accidentally overdosed on some pills. It kind of put a damper on things."

"Oh, crap," Seth said quietly. "Sorry." He didn't know what else to say.

"You don't have to apologize." She mostly looked embarrassed as she tried to explain herself. "I was pretty messed up about stuff that was happening then. But it was an accident," she stressed. "Anyway, there's no way my mom would let me go back again. I might be able to convince my dad, but..."

Seth held up a hand. "It was a just a suggestion. We can think of something else."

"I don't think Sandy and Kirsten would let you go anyway," Ryan said.

"Why not?" Seth shot back, instantly annoyed. "I still know how to drive. I can read a map. I can't remember things that happened but I'm not helpless."

Ryan regarded him, looking calm and cool. "I know you're not helpless. And I agree that you're perfectly capable of going. I'm just saying your parents won't let you." As if suddenly aware that he'd been leaning forward attentively, he sat back against the vinyl cushion. "You know I'm right," he added.

Seth let out a breath of hot air and frustration. "You're right. They won't let me go." Apparently, Ryan knew his parents just as well as Seth did. It was a realization that bugged him but he didn't care to analyse why.

Summer nudged against him briefly. "I don't want to go anyway. Let's do something else."

He gazed down at her and could see that she was serious, as if her friend's plight still haunted her. "Yeah, that's fine." Hating to see her look so troubled, he tried to lighten the mood. "Here, one last bite of cake." He fed it to her with his fork. As she enjoyed the last bit of dessert, he was distracted by a small dab of icing near the corner of her lip. "You've got something...right there..." He tried to point it out but then gave up and used a napkin to wipe it clean.

"You're supposed to kiss it off," Summer chastised him, pulling his head down to demonstrate exactly how it was to be done.

Closing his eyes, he savoured the warmth and sweetness of her mouth, momentarily forgetting where he was. That is, until he heard a not-so-discreet cough from across the table. They broke apart to face a giggling Marissa and a Ryan who was pretending not to look.

"Bad Summer," Seth scolded. "Not in front of the children."

As everyone laughed, he was pleasantly surprised by the fact that this was the happiest he'd been in a long time.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

The remainder of August and the first few days of September flew by in a blur. Kirsten took her boys shopping for new school clothes even though they all knew it was unnecessary. Even Kirsten. But shop they did and she was absolutely thrilled that Seth and Ryan were on speaking terms again. There were still moments of awkwardness but she didn't care and though she tried not to be overly enthusiastic, it ultimately didn't matter. Seth had always been wise enough to see through any act she tried to put on. She was just content that the communication lines in her family were open again.

After the shopping spree on Saturday, Seth and Ryan spent the evening at the pier with Summer and Marissa. They had bantered around some ideas for other places to go on the weekend but in the end, decided to simply hang out together in town. They hadn't done it all summer and now that Seth was feeling more sociable, it seemed the right thing to do. No one, not even Summer, felt like doing anything wild and crazy.

It was quiet on the beach. Most of the people their age were now partying it up in Tijuana. The sun was sinking lower on the horizon, an array of glorious pinks and purples splashing across the sky.

Marissa's head was nestled comfortably on Ryan's shoulder. They shared a blanket on the sand, while Seth and Summer claimed another blanket a few feet away.

As was usually the case, Ryan hadn't said much this evening. But she could sense an ease about him that hadn't existed since he'd returned to Newport. Although they hadn't discussed it in any detail, she knew he was on better terms with Seth now. That had to be the reason and she was happy for both of them.

Wordlessly, she found his hand and entwined her fingers around his. She raised her head a little and smiled as he glanced down at her. He rewarded her with the tiniest of smiles in return and she caught her breath in surprise as his head tilted downwards. They really had been taking things slowly and neither one had made a move to kiss the other. Until now. Her eyes fluttered closed in anticipation. His lips were as soft and inviting as she remembered in her dreams. The moment didn't last long. But it was perfect.

Summer shivered a little as the cool wind swept over her bare legs and arms. Now that the sun was disappearing, the warmth of the day was going with it.

"Cold?" Seth asked, nudging closer to her and rubbing a warm hand down her arm.

"No, I'm okay."

"You're quiet tonight," he observed. "Something wrong?"

"No."

There was something bothering her but she didn't want to admit it to him. She was sad that summer was coming to an end. The last month, they'd spent so much time talking to each other and simply being together. It was the first time that she hadn't been fighting for his attention, whether her competition was Ryan, video games or the hottest comic book. While she appreciated how horrible the amnesia was for Seth, it had actually brought them closer together. Or at least she felt closer to him. From his perspective, he was just getting to know her. Now school would be starting and they would get back to their normal routines. It just wouldn't be the same.

"What is it?" he persisted, obviously aware that her mood was off.

"Nothing." She pressed herself even closer to him. "Let's stay all night," she murmured against his chest.

"Wouldn't your father hunt me down?"

"He'll never find us. We'll disappear."

"You're just kidding. Right?" He sounded like he wasn't quite sure what was going on.

She sighed. "Forget it, Cohen. Just watch the sun set."

As she spoke, the last sliver of the distant orb dipped below the horizon, vanishing entirely from view. They sat in silence and continued to watch the shifting, darkening sky.

* * *

A/N: So the consensus for the name of Summer's father seems to be Neil. Thanks for that. And I will have to check out TWoP sometime.

This chapter isn't the strongest but it was nice to have Seth happy for a change. He's been so angsty lately! This was the transition before the start of school when more fun begins.

I know it's sounding redundant but thank you, thank you for the wonderful reviews. It makes the writing that much more worthwhile.


	10. First Day Blues

As he ambled across the campus, Seth consulted his schedule again and surreptitiously studied a map at the same time. Harbor High consisted of several buildings and he'd gotten lost on more than one occasion this morning. He'd finally given in and picked up a map at the registration desk. History in Room 210 was next.

Not paying as much attention to his surroundings as he should have, he collided shoulders with someone. "Sorry," he uttered automatically.

"Watch it!" an annoyed male voice barked at him.

Seth stopped and turned to see three pairs of eyes glaring at him. They looked like triplets, with their sandy blonde hair, tanned skin, and button-down shirts. The one who had spoken to him looked vaguely familiar but Seth couldn't place his name. He was, however, feeling a prickly sense of déjà vu with this whole scenario.

"I said I was sorry," Seth reiterated, starting to turn away. But he found himself surrounded by three solidly built bodies.

"Not good enough, Cohen. You need to be sorrier than that."

It looked like only the one guy was capable of speech. The other two just mimicked the ringleader's actions. "If I tried to act more sorry, it would be totally insincere," Seth informed him, with a bravado he couldn't believe he was conjuring up. "But I'm sure that subtlety would be lost on you."

With a comically wrinkled brow, it seemed the thug couldn't decide if he'd been insulted or not. "You always were a freak with your stupid babbling. What have we got here?" He ripped the papers from Seth's hand. "A schedule and a _map_?" Laughing loudly, he tore the sheets in two.

Seth launched himself forward, his arm stretching out furiously, but the silent partners held him back. Well, they weren't totally silent. Apparently they were capable of joining in the laughter as well. He could only watch as the papers were wadded into a ball and tossed into a nearby trashcan. "Bet you're sorry now," the guy taunted with a sneer.

"Fuck you, asshole." The words popped out of his mouth without thinking but Seth was fuming and didn't care.

"What did you just say?" The guy took three steps forward until he was inches from Seth's face.

"I thought I was speaking English but maybe the words were echoing so loudly in the cavernous space between your ears that you couldn't hear me properly," Seth spat out. "I said, fuck you ass-"

"That's what I thought you said." Four fat fingers and one thumb clenched into a fist and drew back for what would assuredly be a painful punch. Seth's arms were still pinned, rendering him pathetically helpless. All he could do was brace himself for the impact. But it never came.

"Hey Andy! Lay off," commanded a new voice. "Let him go."

As the vice-like grips on his upper arms were released, Seth regarded the new guy. He looked like he could join the trio to round it out to the fab four with his preppy, designer threads but his hair was a darker shade of brown. And he didn't appear to want Seth's nose in the dirt.

"Come on, he had it coming," Andy whined.

"The guy just came out of a coma. You want to put him in another one?"

"Wouldn't be a bad idea," Andy muttered. He pointed a finger between Seth's eyes. "Watch your step, freak." With that warning, the three amigos went on their way.

Although his arms were throbbing, Seth resisted trying to rub away the discomfort. Pride wouldn't allow it. "Thanks," he said.

"Sure. Do you remember me?"

Seth glanced over his features. He did look familiar. "I feel like I should know you," he said slowly. "But sorry, it's not coming to me."

"Justin Voss." They shook hands and Justin continued. "We've been in some of the same classes since junior high, in case you're wondering. We're not exactly friends but acquaintances, I guess. Anyway, I heard about what happened to you. The coma and everything. Tough break, man."

"Yeah. Sorry, but I've gotta run. I'm late for class."

"Sure. See you around."

Seth walked quickly but he didn't bother running; he was already late anyway. He kept his head down, ignoring the stares and whispers of people who had stopped to watch his predicament. Now he would have to think of some grand reason to obtain another schedule from the registration desk. He supposed he could have reached into the garbage can to retrieve the crumpled wad but he didn't want to give the crowd any more reason to gawk at him. Thankfully, he'd had time to scan the map so he knew where he was going.

At the very least, he was proud of the fact that he'd stood up for himself. Being bullied was something that he was no stranger to but the response that he'd displayed just now had surprised him. He was usually more passive than that. Chalk it up to another personality change? Or perhaps he was tired of being pushed around and had just snapped. Whatever.

How ironic that he'd actually been looking forward to the start of school. Fucking irony. Never a fun ride.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Finally. School was over for the day.

Summer had a spare last period so she headed for the lounge to wait for Seth. They didn't have any classes together today but had compared schedules at lunch. They shared a few classes scattered sporadically across the week but not as many as they would've liked.

Grabbing a bottle of Diet Coke, she found a corner table and dragged out a couple of books. The first day of school and she already had homework. Sucky. Maybe she could get a head start on some reading.

"Hey beautiful."

She only wanted to hear one voice calling her that these days, but this wasn't the voice. Lifting her head with disdain, she met the eyes of Justin Voss. "Get lost," she said icily.

He made a clicking sound with his tongue and plunked himself down on the chair next to her. "Is that any way to greet me? After the night we shared together?"

"In your dreams, jerko," she hissed, scowling at him.

He backed off, wiping the silly grin from his face to regard her seriously. "You're right, I am being a jerk. Sorry. Forgive me?"

"What do you want?"

"Just to talk to you. I hear you're back with Cohen. True?"

"Yeah. That's right." Her tone was challenging, as if daring him to make an issue of it. Which, of course, he did.

"Didn't you tell me you didn't care if you ever saw the guy again? Come to think of it, I think you called him a jerk too. Or was it 'that bastard, son of a bitch'?"

Wonderful, her own words coming back to haunt her. Justin was referring to the night that she'd gone to a party soon after Seth's disappearing act. A couple of days after, in fact. She'd still been in the midst of her rage at that point and determined to act as though she couldn't care less that he'd gone. Justin had struck up a conversation with her and they'd spent most of the night talking.

She'd known him casually since they were kids. His father was a doctor too. Besides being in some classes together, they often ran in the same social circles. He was a nice enough guy from the little she knew of him. Never seemed to lack a girlfriend, though it wasn't like a madly revolving door or anything. Every year or so she noticed someone new on his arm. In fact, he'd never shown any interest in her until this recent party. They'd shared a few drinks. Even a few laughs.

Then he'd kissed her. The move had come out of nowhere and she'd been too surprised to react. When he'd leaned in for the second kiss, however, she'd stopped him with one hand. The night had ceased being fun at that point, for some inexplicable reason. She'd made her excuses and slunk home, cursing Cohen all the way.

Justin was snapping his fingers in front of her nose. "Summer? Hello?"

She made her irritation very plain to see. "Go away."

"You know, I'm still hurt that you never returned my calls. I thought we had a real connection that night. The talking. The laughing. The kissing."

On the last word, he wiggled his eyebrows in such an exaggerated manner that she almost laughed before catching herself. "_You_ kissed _me_. Once. And I never kissed you back," she reminded him.

He looked unconcerned with her point. "A mere technicality. Things might have turned out differently if you hadn't taken off."

She decided the time had come for brutal honesty. "Look, Justin, you're a nice guy. Go find yourself a nice girl. You don't want me. I'm anything but nice. Even though I ranted and raved to you about Cohen, we're back together. Pretty screwed up, right? But that's me. So do yourself a favour and run."

Bursting out with laughter, he shook his head. "You're something else, you know that? I'm going. For now."

He left her alone at the table once more, while she glared after his retreating back. 'For now', he'd said. Couldn't the guy take a hint? Grabbing her drink, she twisted the cap off fiercely, imagining that it was Justin's neck.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

The blessed bell rang and everyone scrambled to toss notebooks and pencils into their bags, fighting to be the first one out the door. Most of the kids grumbled about having their Advanced Math class scheduled at the end of the day, but Ryan quite liked it. He found it both logical and methodical work that helped his scrambled brain relax after the day's rigours. Zipping up his bag, he found Seth ready and waiting beside him.

"You don't have soccer practice today, do you?" Seth asked, sounding hopeful.

"No. It doesn't start up until next week. Why?"

"You want to catch a ride home with me?"

"Sure. Thanks."

They stepped outside into the sunshine and headed for the parking lot. "So how did you find classes today?" Ryan asked. "I mean, do you remember stuff you learned before?"

"Yeah, it's okay. Like in Math. I know how to do those formulas but I don't remember _learning_ how to do it. And I don't remember any of the teachers. I even got lost today," Seth admitted.

Ryan felt badly for him. But he had one solution he could offer. "We'll get you a map."

"I had one."

"_Had_ one? Don't tell me you lost it already," he joked. But seeing the look on Seth's face, the attempt at humour fell flat. "What's wrong?"

Seth stopped walking and his head jerked around, as if he wanted to make sure no one was eavesdropping. "Listen," he said quietly, his voice full of urgency. "You've gotta help me. You need to teach me how to fight. Or at least how to defend my sorry ass so I don't get it kicked into the next state."

Ryan's trouble radar started buzzing and beeping in full force. "Is someone harassing you? Who is it? Those water polo assholes?"

"I have no idea. The big guy...well, they're all big guys, but the mother of them all is Andy. That's all I know."

Ryan regarded Seth's lean frame up and down with a critical, trained eye. "Are you okay? Did they hurt you? Just tell me and I'll beat the living..."

"Ryan, dude, take it easy," Seth advised. "It's nice to know you care but don't go ballistic on me." He cracked a small smile. "I guess I underestimated the value of brotherly love. It's kind of nice. But I digress. Some guy named Justin came by and stopped the madness before my nose got bloodied. So everything's cool. I just want to be a little more prepared next time. That's where you come in. Dad told me you've been in a few scrapes so I figure you're the kind of the guy that can handle himself. Am I right? I know I'm right. So please, just say you'll help me out here."

All of Ryan's protective instincts were kicking in and though he wasn't sure if this was the right way to handle things, it was certainly something he had a lot of experience in. He found himself nodding in agreement. "Yes!" Seth rejoiced. "Come on, let's boot it home before the folks get in. We can practise outside."

Seth was so eager to make it home in record time, Ryan had to yell at him several times to slow down. A speeding ticket would not have helped matters. Once at home, they tossed their bags inside the house and went to a grassy area of the back yard.

Seth immediately started bouncing up and down on his heels, arms bent at the elbow and fists clenched. He jabbed some mock punches and emitted some snarly sounding growls. Ryan couldn't help it. Even though he tried to cover his mouth, he shook with laughter at the ridiculous sight.

"Laugh it up, man. We'll see if you're laughing when I crawl home one day with all of my limbs missing." Seth stopped his bouncing, as if reflecting on that interesting mental image. "Okay, not the best example, but you know what I mean. Come on, let's go," he ordered impatiently.

Ryan forced himself to get serious. "Okay. Let's say someone has your arms pinned." He walked behind Seth and took hold of his upper arms in a firm grip, but not hard enough to be hurtful. "Like this," he continued. "You could..._OW_!"

Letting him go, Ryan cradled his right foot. "Jesus, Seth!" he shouted, gasping from the pain of having his toes crunched by a merciless stomping action.

"I'm sorry!" Seth exclaimed. But despite his apology, he sounded suspiciously excited. "It was instinct. Is that what you were going to suggest?"

"Something like," Ryan muttered, limping around and shaking out his foot.

"Funny I never thought to do that today," Seth mused out loud. "I guess those guys were more intimidating than you."

"Gee, thanks."

"Okay, what's next?"

He'd never been a praying man but Ryan took a few seconds to silently recite a prayer for his safety. "Let's try the art of dodging a punch. It's called ducking."

"I really have to practise that?" Seth gave him a doubtful look.

"There's actually timing involved. You don't want to duck too late, for obvious reasons. But if you do it too early, the guy doing the punching will have time to readjust his swing and you're gonna get plowed. Make sense?"

"I guess."

"So we'll just do it in slow motion first."

Ryan explained what he would do and in turn, what he wanted Seth to do. They would start slowly so no one would get hurt. He drew back his arm and stopped, counting to five in his head. "Seth? You're ducking already."

"No I'm not."

"Yes you are! I didn't even start the swing yet and you're ducking. Don't move until I tell you to. Okay?"

Seth nodded, his face a study of concentration. They tried it again but he still flinched and ducked his head too early. Ryan sighed, trying to hold onto his patience. "This isn't working. Let's try this. You do the punching and I'll duck. Then you'll see what the timing should be like."

"Are you sure this is a good idea?"

"You want to learn, right? So we have to do this. Come on, Seth, swing like you're gonna knock my lights out. Forget the slow mo right now. I've had plenty of practice. I know when to duck."

Once again, Seth sounded rather dubious. "Okay." But he obligingly formed a solid fist, focused on Ryan's face, and swung with all his might.

Ryan braced himself, saw the fist flying, and then got distracted by movement in the corner of his eye. It was Sandy, coming straight towards them. Within a split second, he thought to duck but it was too late. Seth's fist cracked against his jaw and he staggered sideways, somehow managing not to fall over.

"_Seth_!" Sandy roared with a frightening intensity. "What the _hell_ is the matter with you? Ryan, are you all right?"

Neither one was capable of answering right away. They were both groaning and cradling their respective injured body parts. Ryan tried to mumble that he was fine but the words were incoherent. So much for praying. He gave a thumbs up sign instead.

"You were supposed to duck!" Seth cried accusingly. "I think my thumb is broken," he whined.

Sandy faced them with hands on his hips, in his best parental stance. "Okay, 'fess up. I want to know what's going on here. Since Ryan seems incapable of speech at the moment, you go first," he directed his son.

"I just asked Ryan to give me some pointers on how to fight." At the bugged-out look of his father's eyes, Seth quickly added," Well, more like how to defend myself. The school is full of predators, Dad. You don't want me to be vulnerable prey that can easily be picked off, do you? Think of what that would do to our evolutionary line. I have a right to defend myself."

"Yes," Sandy agreed, sounding very careful. "You do have a right to defend yourself if you're attacked in any way. Is that what happened today?"

"No. I just, you know, want to be ready," Seth replied, sounding wholly unconvincing.

Ryan timidly moved his jaw back and forth. Seemed to be in good working order. "Learning to defend yourself is important," he ventured to say, relieved that he sounded normal.

"Agreed." Sandy slipped a finger beneath his tie, loosening the knot. "Carry on then. But do me a favour. Don't let your mother catch you. I just talked to Kirsten and she's going to be home in twenty minutes."

"Why are you both home so early?" Seth asked.

"We just wanted to hear about the first day back at school. That's all." Before turning to go, Sandy had one last request. "Show me how you make a fist." Gazing at Seth's clenched fingers and thumb, he said, "No, it should be like this." He gently rearranged the positioning so the thumb was curved outside of the fingers, not underneath. "Less chance of hurting your thumb that way," he explained. "_Not_ that I'm condoning fighting or punching in any way. But every man should know how to make a proper fist."

Looking rather nonplussed, Seth watched his father walk away and then looked back at Ryan. "Have I mentioned he's from the Bronx?" he asked.

"Let's just call it a day," Ryan suggested hopefully.

"Oh, come on! Just twenty more minutes. I haven't learned that timing thing yet," Seth pleaded.

At this rate, Ryan wasn't sure if he'd live another twenty minutes. But he'd always found it difficult to refuse Seth. Especially now that they were starting to reconnect again. Quite literally, it seemed.

"All right," he grumbled. "But let's go back to slow mo."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Chewing on the end of his pen, Seth contemplated the next question. Homework, lovely homework. His mind started drifting and then a sudden thought made him drop the pen.

"Oh fuck!" he swore aloud. He might have set his own personal record for how many times he'd used the f-word today. "Oh my God, she's going to _kill_ me," he moaned, scrambling for the phone.

It was answered after the first ring. "This better be you, Cohen," snarled the angry voice.

"Summer, I am so, so, _so_ sorry. I am a complete ass."

"I sat in that lounge for almost two hours! Two hours of my life that I'll never get back. I can't believe you stood me up!"

"I can't believe it either. I had a lousy day and I just wanted to get the hell out of there. I completely forgot we were going to meet. I...I can't say enough how sorry I am." While he was talking, he was frantically thinking of a way to appease her. "I'll make it up to you."

"You better think of something good," she grumbled.

"How about, uh, you get to pick the next five movies we see?"

"Ten."

He winced silently, squeezing his eyes shut and clenching a properly formed fist, visions of chick flicks dancing across his closed lids. "Yeah, sure. Ten is a good round number," he forced himself to say brightly. "Am I forgiven now?"

But she was on a roll. "And you have to come shopping with me."

"Shopping," he repeated dully, forgetting to sound cheerful. He tried to sound more upbeat with his next words. "I can do that. Sure. Yup."

"Okay, you're forgiven. Just don't ever, _ever_ stand me up again," she warned.

He placed a hand over his heart, as if she had x-ray vision through the phone. "I won't. I swear."

"Good. So why was your day so lousy?"

He flopped back on the bed, twirling the phone cord with his finger. "Everything was just weird. People kept staring at me and I was trying to figure out if they knew me or if I had my fly undone or something. I guess everyone knows what happened to me, huh."

"Pretty much. Everyone knows everyone's business."

"Guess that's Newport's charm. How was your day?"

"Okay, I guess." She sounded less than enthusiastic with that vague answer. "At least we get English together tomorrow," she added, sounding happier with that prospect.

He was pleased about that too. They chatted for a few more minutes but since neither one of them seemed anxious to go into much more detail about the first day of school, they soon said goodnight.

Tomorrow morning, he would have to leave a little early so he could get another copy of his schedule. And another map. He wasn't sure what he would do the next time he had an encounter with Andy and his sidekicks. Ryan's lesson today made him feel a little less helpless but he just wasn't sure how he would react. While there was the slim possibility that there wouldn't be a next time, he doubted he would get so lucky. Such good fortune just never seemed to be in the cards for him.

But hey, he did have Summer now. That had to count for something. It was about the only good thing he had going right now. He just had to be sure not to blow it.

* * *

A/N: I think I just had way too much fun writing this chapter. I hope you enjoyed reading it just as much! And, as always, thanks for those reviews. I appreciate the time you put into telling me what you think.


	11. Discover Me Discovering You

Impressed, Seth watched as Summer polished off the very last french fry with gusto. The portions at the Crab Shack were not shabby by any means. The heap of fries alone could probably feed several children of a starving nation. Ditto for the oversized burger. She emitted an unladylike burp, giggled, and primly excused herself.

He chuckled, pushing away his own plate. The burger had been devoured but there were scatterings of a few stray fries. He'd been amused to discover she could match him bite for bite in any meal and sometimes, as she had tonight, even surpass him. She wasn't one to pick at her food, as other girls seemed to do. It was just one of the fascinating things that he'd been discovering about her for more than a month now.

He'd admired Summer from afar since elementary school and liked to think he knew her better than anyone else. While he had never gathered the nerve to actually talk to her, he'd kept himself busy studying her every move. Even then, she'd been a bundle of contradictions. Loud and obnoxious in a group, but shy and unsure of herself when speaking in front of the class. She'd spent most of her free time gossiping with her little clique but he'd often found her alone too, reading a book or on the swing, flying higher and higher. When boys had teased her, pulling her shiny hair or snatching her book away, she'd never ran tattling to the teacher. Instead, she'd chased after the culprit and made him sorry and afraid for his life, often pummelling him into the ground. Seth had sometimes considered charging in and saving the day but she'd never needed to be saved.

He had numerous memories of her and though he'd once tried to pinpoint the last thing he could remember her doing or saying, nothing concrete had come to him. The memories seemed to blend into each other and he simply couldn't distinguish any timeframes. So fast-forward to present day. She still intrigued him and as they spent more time together, new facets of her personality were revealed to him. While she was very frank and outspoken about most things, he sensed that she kept some things hidden and private. Whether it was a deliberate choice or an unconscious one, he wasn't sure. But he supposed everyone was entitled to their secrets. It certainly added to her air of mystery and made him that much more determined to know her. All of her.

"So what next?" he asked, taking a brief glance at his watch. "It's still early."

"It's Friday night. I'm sure there's some party we can crash," Summer suggested. "Or we could go to my place. My dad's away at a conference. And my step mom's at some spa retreat with her friends."

"You mean we'd be all alone in your big house?" Seth asked.

She smiled, arching an eyebrow at him. "That's what I'm saying."

He put up his hand, waving at their waitress. "Excuse me? Could we get the cheque?"

Fifteen minutes later, after having trailed Summer's car, he was pulling into her driveway. As the house came into view, he realized that this was the first time he'd been here. At least since the accident, anyway. He wondered why she hadn't invited him over until now but then put the thought aside, deciding to concentrate on the present. She led the way and he followed, through the front door, the foyer, and up the staircase to the second floor. He took a cursory look at his surroundings but it didn't interest him much. Neither did she offer to give him the grand tour.

Once in her bedroom, she switched on a lamp and kicked aside her shoes, dropping her purse to the floor. She sat down on the bed and he took a moment to absorb the vibe from her room. Now this was more interesting than the expensive, pristine furniture and décor he'd seen downstairs. He could see a lot of Summer in the room. Pinks and frills and lace. Teddy bears and God, was that a purple pony? Nuzzling up to one Captain Oats, no less.

With a pointed index finger, Seth asked, "Is that what I think it is?"

Summer glanced at her bedside table. When she answered, her tone was defensive. "Yeah, I took him. You were going to throw him out, right? You didn't want him so he's staying with me. You have a problem with that?"

"No. No problem. He's probably been lonely for some female company anyway." He changed topics with haste. "So this is your room. Nice. Kind of girly."

She tossed her hair and leaned back, the movement thrusting her chest out ever so slightly. "I am a girl, in case you haven't noticed."

Was it his imagination or was she coming on to him? His nerve impulses starting zinging madly, as he forced his gaze up from the enticing area below her neck to look into her come-hither eyes. He swallowed, his mouth suddenly so dry he had to unglue his tongue. "I noticed. Definitely noticed," he finally said, somewhat hoarsely.

She patted the bed. "Sit down. And stop looking so nervous."

"Who's nervous?" His attempt to sound flip was failing miserably. But he gingerly sat beside her and eyed the pink bedspread. "Summer, have we...uh, you know, done the deed? Danced the horizontal mambo?"

"Had sex?" she translated bluntly.

"Yeah, that," he acknowledged in a faint voice.

"Yup."

"More than once?"

"I've lost count."

"Oh my God." He almost started laughing but realized that probably wouldn't go over so well. There were two things that he tended to do when nervous – ramble and laugh. It was against his very nature but he managed to curb both impulses. "That's very...interesting."

She frowned at that under whelming statement. "Interesting? That's the best you can come up with?"

"I'm trying to play it cool," he said honestly. "But actually, there are better words like staggering, mind-blowing, and hot damn."

"Damn straight," she agreed, reaching up with one hand to guide his head down for a staggeringly hot, mind-blowing kiss.

As their lips met and melded, Seth stopped thinking and focused on feeling. She felt wonderful in his arms. Warm and sensuous. All curves and satiny skin. He realized they were now lying on the bed or rather, he was lying on top of Summer. But she didn't seem to mind, continuing to kiss him as her fingers began tugging at his shirt. There was a lot of yanking but no progress in the shirt removal. She wrenched her lips from his with a sound of frustration, looking down to work at his buttons. "What is it with you and these freaking shirts?" she muttered.

He had no clue what she meant by that but at the moment, also couldn't care less. Since his mouth was currently idle, he started kissing her forehead, pausing to inhale the scent of her hair. It smelled clean with a hint of citrus, like a refreshing sip of lemonade. He trailed more kisses down the side of her face and zeroed in on her ear lobe, nibbling on the tantalizing pink shell.

She froze, suddenly stiff in his arms. Whoops, guess that move wasn't appreciated. He backed off but she placed a hand on his cheek. "No, don't stop," she murmured. "You remembered, didn't you?"

"What?"

She was practically purring. "One of my hot spots, Cohen. Bonus points for you if you remember the other one."

He could win bonus points? Wondering what his prize would be, he felt the coolness of the air against his bare chest. It seemed she had figured out the complexities of unbuttoning his shirt. "Have you been working out?" she asked abruptly.

He coughed, almost choked, and tried to recover gracefully. "No. Why?"

"You look a little more buff than I remember. I mean, not all freakish muscles that are kind of ew, but there's definitely something more."

He had been continuing his lessons with Ryan for the past couple of weeks and they'd even graduated to a punching bag. But he couldn't believe that had made a difference in such a short time. Still, he looked down at his own chest and arms with curiosity. Well, he wasn't scrawny but he wouldn't exactly describe himself as buff either.

"Unzip me. Quick," Summer demanded. She had turned around, presenting him with the back of her dress.

"Your wish is my command." As he guided the zipper downwards, he leaned forward and tasted her ear lobe again, adding a whisper of hot breath just for fun. This time, she melted against him with a sigh of pleasure.

As they fell back on the bed, he prayed for guidance in finding hot spot number two.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

They lay side-by-side, shoulders brushing against each other. The glow was starting to fade and Summer tried to hang onto its warmth for as long as possible.

"So that was sex." Seth spoke in a slightly dazed voice.

She gave him a sidelong glance, almost positive that's exactly what he had said the first time. Of course, _this_ time seemed like the first time to him. Except this had been a hundred times better. "Not that I have anything to compare it to that I remember," he continued. "But that was pretty good. Wasn't it?"

"Yeah," she stated shortly. She wasn't about to start gushing over it. She could only imagine what that would do to bloat his ego. It would probably end up as dinner conversation at the Cohen household's next meal. "It was better than the first time," she conceded.

He gave her a concerned look. "Why? Was it that bad?"

"It totally sucked. For both of us."

"Really? Even with all your experience?"

Glowering at him, she punched his arm. "Ow! What did I say?" he protested.

"You can be such an ass."

She knew it was the amnesia talking but sometimes she found it frustrating to have to explain things that were over and done with. She hadn't wanted to tell him about Anna but she'd done it, reasoning that he had a right to know what had happened. But she hadn't enjoyed reliving the insecurities that she'd been plagued with during that time. And now she would have to talk about the excruciatingly embarrassing moment of first time sex. She gritted her teeth and plunged ahead. "Why would you assume I have experience?" she asked.

"Well, you're popular and gorgeous and I...I don't know," he stammered, looking like he wanted to hide under a rock. "I guess I just figured you've gone out with a lot of guys."

"Gone out with, yes. Had sex with, no." She softened her tone a little with her next words. "You were my first one too."

He looked thunderstruck with that revelation. "God. Summer. Wow."

Other than that string of words, he seemed speechless. As she tugged the sheet up a little higher, feeling stupidly self-conscious, she was caught off-guard by his sudden kiss. She closed her eyes and enjoyed it, lids fluttering upwards when he finally pulled back.

"What was that for?" she asked, hoping she didn't sound as breathless as she felt.

"I love you."

She wasn't sure if it was humanly possible but she was sure her heart skipped a beat. Just like those dumb old love songs with the syrupy lyrics.

"Cohen," she murmured.

"You don't have to say anything," he said hastily. "I mean, I've loved you forever so it's nothing new to me. I just wanted to say it out loud." He forced a shaky laugh. "Who knows, I could get hit by a bus tomorrow. Or in Newport's case, a speeding Porsche. But anyway, you've been honest with me so it just felt right for me to say it. Don't freak out or anything, okay?"

"I'm not freaked out," she tried to assure him. But truthfully, she was. A little. She thought she loved him to but she couldn't bring herself to say it. Once the words were verbalized, they would be out there for good, leaving her vulnerable. And that was a position she never put herself in. She'd never said those three little words to anyone before. Except her father.

She found herself wracked by a wave of guilt. She still hadn't told her father that she was seeing Seth again.

"I have freaked you out, haven't I," he stated, sounding stressed. "Man, I knew I shouldn't have said anything! I'm sorry."

This was going all wrong. The lovely glow had definitely faded and turned to a dull shade of grey. "Don't apologize, for God's sakes," she told him, almost snappishly. "For the last time, I'm not freaked out. But I haven't been honest." She couldn't believe what was coming out of her mouth but Seth's openness had touched her and she felt she had to give something back. Perhaps she couldn't return his declaration of love just yet but she could try to live up to his perception of her honesty.

He was giving her a puzzled look. "What do you mean?"

"Didn't you think it was weird that I never invited you over until now?"

"Actually, I never thought about it until tonight. But yeah, the thought crossed my mind," he admitted.

She'd come this far so she saw no point in beating around the bush. "I haven't told my father about us. When you took off sailing, I told him it was over between us. He doesn't know that we're back together."

"Oh."

She waited for him to expand on that singular sound but nothing seemed forthcoming.

"That's all you have to say? 'Oh'?"

"Well, I assume you're going to tell him sometime soon. Right?"

Now it was her turn to become silent as he waited for her answer. "Right, Summer?" he asked again.

"I don't know."

"You don't know?"

"That's what I said."

She could plainly see him struggling to make sense of what she was saying.

"I don't get it," he said at last. "What's the big secret? Are you ashamed of me or something?"

"No, not ashamed, exactly. But..." She chewed on her lip for a second. "You kind of made a bad impression on him the last time you met him. Basically he hates you."

Seth's eyes widened and he looked totally distressed. "_Hates_ me? Hate is a pretty strong word. Extremely strong, actually. Are you sure you wouldn't classify it as a mild dislike?"

"Would that make you feel better?"

"Yeah, I think it would."

"Fine. But I would put it in the category of a strong dislike."

He blew out a dejected breath. "Great. So tell me what happened."

Summer relayed the basics of what had occurred during that fateful lunch, including Seth's nonsensical, non-stop babbling and her father's stony silence. When she finished the sorry tale, he gave her a pleading look. "Give me another chance. I don't even read comics anymore."

"Yeah, but you'll just ramble about something else. It's what you do when you're nervous."

"I know but I can control myself when I put my mind to it. Honest."

She sighed, not sure what to do. "I don't know."

He suddenly switched tactics on her. "So, what, you're just going to pretend I don't exist? You and me, that's what's important, right? Maybe you shouldn't care so much what Daddy thinks," he challenged.

Glaring and pouting, she clammed up and turned on her side, with her back to him. She didn't want to acknowledge that he was right. "Hey, would you talk to me?" he called out from behind her shoulder. When he touched her arm, she slid off the bed and began getting dressed. After a belated moment, she heard Seth start to do the same, slowly slipping back into his clothes. "So that's it?" he asked, breaking the tense silence.

"Guess so," she replied dully.

Finished dressing, they stood in the room facing each other. But while she felt his gaze on her, she studied the fascinating collection of reading material on her bookshelf.

"I don't want to end the night this way," Seth said softly. "We may have done this countless times, like you said, but for me, it was the first time. That makes it special. So it can't end like this, with both of us being upset. Just help me understand. Why is your dad's opinion so important to you?"

"Because he's the only guy I've ever known who hasn't let me down," she burst out, both sorry and relieved that the truth was finally emerging. Crossing her arms in front of her chest, she turned around and sat down heavily on the bed. She began to speak in a more controlled voice. "If he makes me a promise, I know he's going to keep it. It's that simple. Unlike any other man I've ever met. And yeah, I've gone out with a lot of guys. Not many of them made it as far as meeting my father but out of all the ones that did, do you know how many he actually liked? Zero. He thought they were all losers. And he was right. I have a knack for picking out prime jerks. So imagine how I felt when surprise, surprise, Daddy thought you were a loser too." She looked up from the floor to meet Seth's gaze. "I know you're different, Cohen. Or at least I thought you were until you took off. Then I started thinking that maybe he was right about you. That you were just another jerk in the long line of jerks I've known."

Seth slowly shuffled over to the bed and sat down beside her. "Okay, that definitely helps me understand. I don't exactly know all these other guys you've been with but if they're anything like the asses I've had the pleasure of meeting at Harbor, I'm pretty sure we shouldn't be lumped into the same jerk subheading. As for me leaving the way I did, I can't even offer a defense because I don't remember what I was thinking. I mean, sure, my parents showed me the letter I wrote and the fact that I was all boo hoo over Ryan going back to Chino, but that's just what they're telling me. I can't tell you how I really felt. So, what am I really trying to say here? I guess I'm saying that you have to put some faith in me and in us. And part of that means telling your dad about us." He paused to glance at her. "What do you think?"

Seth was right. She knew he was right. But she dreaded her father's reaction to the news. He would not be pleased. "I know you're right," she said at last. "But it's just not going to be easy."

"Nothing's ever easy."

She nodded. They sat for a while in a semi-truce until Seth placed an arm around her shoulder, giving it a gentle squeeze. "You know, I never did find that second hot spot, did I?"

Summer couldn't help cracking a smile. "Nope. Better luck next time."

He shrugged and returned her smile. "The thrill is in the chase anyway."

While they hadn't managed to resolve all their issues in one night, they'd at least made a start. And when Summer thought back to Seth's utterance of those three little words, she was able to regain a small portion of that warm, inner glow.

* * *

A/N: I'm afraid Real Life has reared its ugly head. Sorry for the slow update. But I am determined to see this story through to the end as long as you keep reading :-) Thanks one and all for the reviews. They truly make my day!

I'm not sure if I need to give credit for this, but what the hey. The title of this chapter is from a line from the lyrics of John Mayer's "Your Body Is A Wonderland".


	12. Crash And Burn

The next couple of weeks were uneventful ones for Seth. He went to school, did his homework and assignments, and when time permitted, he squeezed in some 'Prevention of Ass Kicking' classes with Ryan. His foster brother was busier now with his own schedule of school, soccer, and Marissa but he was always conscientious of making time for Seth. A fact that didn't go unnoticed and was appreciated by his student. There had been no sign of Andy and his gang since the first day of school. That was just fine by Seth. He had no desire to go looking for them to test out his shaky skills.

Other than their classes together, he only saw Summer a couple of times. They saw movies over the last two weekends – her choice of film, of course. Before saying goodnight at the end of each evening, he'd asked if she'd spoken to her father about their relationship yet. The answer was no. She continued to make excuses and it was truly starting to irritate him. He kept his temper in check, however, and decided to give her some more time. But in actual fact, she'd had two months to tell him and had chosen not to. He wasn't sure how much longer this could go unresolved before things would come to a head. It was an unwelcome thought and one that he pushed to a far corner of his mind.

While his memory loss continued to plague him, it had become quite second nature. He hated it but had gotten used to it. His lack of interest in things was starting to wear him down, though. He hadn't touched a comic since the day of the big purging of his room. Occasionally, he played some video games with Ryan or his dad. Admittedly, it was fun but nothing to get excited about. Whenever he was in his car or his room, he turned on the radio to listen to the newest tunes. There were a few catchy songs out there but nothing special. Then again, judging by his former CD collection, he hadn't exactly been into the Top 40 countdown. His tastes had certainly not been mainstream.

He didn't even care much about school, although it was his senior year. Translation – the most important year before college. It wasn't like his parents had brought up the subject yet but he was sure they expected him to go. After all, his father was a lawyer and his mother a brainiac executive. He was mildly surprised that Grandpa wasn't trying to mould him to take over the family business. Perhaps he figured there was too much of the Cohen blood running through his veins to be up to snuff. While he wasn't entirely against the idea of college, there was really no subject that grabbed his interest. He liked English well enough and History was okay but he didn't see the point in majoring in those kinds of subjects. People did it, of course, but it just didn't seem very practical. The largest part of the problem was that he felt like he'd missed the first three years of high school. Now he was just thrown into the tail end of things and expected to go on as usual. It was frustrating, confusing, and he chose to deal with it by not thinking about it.

Another day of school had ended. Thankfully, it was Friday. Seth stood in front of his locker, unloading some items from his bag that he wouldn't need this weekend. Every little bit helped. His bag usually felt like a ton of bricks. Textbooks were evilly heavy.

"Hey, Seth. How's it going?" called out a voice above his head.

Straightening up, Seth found Justin at his side with a friendly smile on his face.

"Going good. How're you?"

"Excellent. Listen, man, I'm having a little party at my place tomorrow night. You and Summer should come." His smile widened into a grin, revealing startling white and perfectly aligned teeth. "In fact, invite everyone you know and help me spread the word. It should be a blast. What do you say?"

Perfect timing. Seth had talked to Summer on the phone last night and she'd been complaining that they hadn't gone to one party since the start of school. The last party that he could remember was some lame ass gathering for a kid's twelfth birthday. Wait, that had been his own twelfth birthday.

"Yeah, I'll pass it on," Seth replied. "Sounds good."

"Great. Later."

As Justin walked further down the hall, he stopped to chat with another guy, no doubt continuing to spread the open invitation. Seth spotted Marissa and Ryan coming his way. Just as they were about to pass by Justin, he called out, "Hey, Marissa! Party at my place tomorrow night. You can't miss it."

She glanced over at him and gave a half wave of acknowledgement but she didn't reply. The couple came to a halt in front of Seth.

"What do you think?" Seth asked, directing his question to Marissa.

"About what?" Oh, that party?"

"Yeah." He slammed the locker door shut and slung his bag across his shoulder. "We should go. What happened to the fun we all were supposed to be having? I haven't experienced any of it yet."

Marissa shrugged. "I don't have any plans. Sure, we could go."

"Ryan?" Seth asked.

"I've got an assignment due Monday..."

Seth exhaled with exasperation. "Come on, bro, are you kidding me? Knowing you, it's probably halfway done already. That's what Sunday night is for. Don't bail on me."

That's all the coaxing it took for Ryan to give in.

"Okay," he said simply.

Later that night on the phone, Summer was ecstatic about the party. She mused aloud about what she'd wear and wondered if the occasion called for a new outfit.

"Whose party is it, anyway?" she asked.

"Justin." Seth paused for a moment. "Um, his last name is Voss, I think."

The abrupt silence on the line struck him as odd after the endless stream of chatter he'd had in his ear. "Summer?"

"Yeah, I'm here." She sounded strange, as if she was tense.

"Something wrong?" he questioned.

She spoke quickly. "No, it's nothing. It doesn't matter anyway. So what time should we go?"

His curfew on a Saturday night was midnight. But he had no idea when these things tended to get going. "Anytime. You decide."

"Eight o'clock, then?"

"Sure. Should I pick you up?"

"No, don't bother. I know where Justin lives. He's out in your direction anyway. I'll just meet you there, okay?"

"Fine. See you there."

They hung up soon after. Seth was disappointed but not surprised that she hadn't passed his little test. Her refusal of his offer to pick her up wasn't out of concern in inconveniencing him. It meant that she still hadn't had that little chat with her father. Patience, he told himself. He needed to be patient.

But that line of reasoning was starting to wear thin and pretty soon, it was going to snap.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Following Marissa's directions, Seth turned right and slowed as they drove down a street that was lined with cars on both sides.

"Looks like he invited the whole school," Seth said dryly.

Ryan's head kept swivelling, scanning through the window. "I don't see any empty spots," he reported.

"Well maybe if a certain someone hadn't been almost an hour late, we wouldn't have to park a mile away."

"How many times do I have to say sorry?" Marissa snapped from the back seat.

"Guys, just give it a rest," Ryan said, sounding exasperated.

Tired of arguing, Seth shut his mouth and turned down the next block, only to encounter more cars.

Marissa suddenly shot her arm out over Seth's shoulder. "There's a spot!" She pointed off to the left. It was a little tight but he managed to parallel park with success on the first try. They all jumped out and made their way to the party zone.

Other than the street having become a parking lot, one would never know there was a hopping event going on inside the imposingly large, lit up house. Not from the front, anyway. As they got to within a few feet of the front door, music could be heard only faintly. Not bothering to knock, Marissa opened the door and let herself in, with Ryan and Seth following close behind.

It was like being plunged into another world. All of Seth's senses were simultaneously walloped as he looked around with wide eyes. Blaring music and loud, overlapping voices filled his ears. He could smell pot mixed with a rainbow of various perfumes and colognes. The resulting fragrance was not pleasant and made him slightly nauseous. In this corner, a group was happily snorting cocaine. In that corner, a couple was making out on the floor and practically going horizontal. And everywhere in between, people were drinking, laughing and dancing. Well, maybe flailing was a better term. And this was just the foyer to the house. Extra chairs, tables and a stereo had been thoughtfully set up by the host.

Marissa had already found a friend to catch up with, leaving Ryan with Seth. He practically had to shout in Ryan's ear to be heard. "Have we been to other parties like this?"

"Some," Ryan replied, also raising his voice. "They're all pretty much the same."

This sure beat his twelfth birthday bash. "Cool," Seth commented quietly, mostly to himself.

"What?"

"Nothing. Who's Marissa talking to?"

"I have no idea. Want to go out back? I can't think in here," Ryan complained.

Although this seemed to be the hub of the action, Seth shrugged. "Sure."

"I'll just tell her where we're going."

As Ryan left his side, the host himself made an appearance in front of Seth.

"Hey, man!" Justin greeted him. "Did you just get here?"

"Yeah. Had some parking trouble. I was expecting valet service."

Justin laughed. "Well, the beer's flowing freely so help yourself. I saw Summer on the patio. She looks amazing. Have fun!"

With that, he moved off to mingle some more. Ryan came back and they started heading to the rear of the house, dodging and weaving through the crowd. Once they stepped through the sliding glass doors to the outside air, Seth breathed in deeply. Okay, maybe it was better out here. His lungs certainly appreciated it and the atmosphere was less frantic.

Some people had come prepared with bathing suits, so the pool was being put to good use. Hold on, now. He squinted, unable to believe his eyes. Apparently, some people didn't care if they had proper suits or not. Naked skin was all the fashion nowadays anyway.

He tapped Ryan on the shoulder with one finger. "Ryan, check out the..."

"Where have you guys been?" demanded a familiar voice. "You're, like, an hour late."

Seth turned to see that Summer had snuck up on his blind spot, staring daggers at him.

"Sorry," he apologized quickly. "Man, you look amazing." He was aware he was repeating Justin's words but they happened to be true.

"I saw you ogling the bare breasted bimbo over there, Cohen. Nice try."

Ryan's eyebrows shot up at that statement and he instinctively glanced over at the pool area, checking out the sight for himself. "Chino! Would you be doing that if Coop was here?"

He dragged his gaze back to Summer, lip curled in amusement. "I plead the fifth."

Summer snorted with derision. "Guys and boobs. I just don't get it."

"Hey, that could be a great new musical." Seth laughed at his own joke and Ryan cracked up too. They both stood there, laughing themselves silly. Summer didn't get the reference and simply glared at them.

"Have you two been smoking something?"

Seth got himself under control but made the mistake of looking at Ryan. That set them both off again and she shook her head at them. "Sad. Both of you are just sad. So where is Coop?"

Composing himself with some difficulty, Seth was able to answer. "She's talking to someone inside. And she's the reason we're late, by the way," he added.

But Summer didn't seem to care about that anymore. "I've been saving us some chairs. Come on." She led them over to a corner of the deck. The largest cooler that Seth had ever seen was just a couple of feet away, filled to the brim with ice and beer. Summer already had one in her hand. He wondered if he should. Hell, why not? He bent down and plucked one out. Ryan hesitated but he finally reached down as well.

As they settled in, Seth glanced over at his girlfriend. "I was serious, by the way. You do look amazing. I like your hair like that."

She smiled, obviously pleased. "Thanks."

Her hair had been upswept somehow, though he didn't see any evidence of pins. Her hair was so smooth and silky, it was a mystery to him how the style managed to hold. But it exposed her neck, making it seem longer and more alluring. Her skirt was flowered and flirty, with a matching sleeveless top. Flowers weren't her usual thing but tonight, she looked the picture of charming femininity.

She had been watching the patio doors and suddenly stood up, waving. "Coop! Over here," she called out. Marissa waved back and made her way over. "Want a beer?" Summer asked, already getting to her feet.

"Uh. No thanks."

Her friend looked startled. "Why not?"

"I haven't been drinking much lately." Marissa sat down, crossing her long legs and bobbing one sandaled foot up and down.

"Since when?"

"A while. What's the big deal?"

Shrugging one shoulder, Summer took her seat again. "No biggie. Just wondering."

"Sorry we're late. It's my fault, as I'm sure Seth already told you." Marissa cast him a sidelong glance and he made a face at her. "My hair wasn't cooperating and then I found out Caitlin stole the dress I was going to wear, along with two others. She was playing dress-up with a couple of friends so I had to chase them down. I wouldn't have minded so much if they hadn't picked out three of my favourite outfits." She chuckled lightly. "At least they have taste."

Seth sipped at his beer as the four of them caught up on what had been happening the last few weeks. Now that the routine of school had started, they each had their own schedules and busy lives to attend to. It was nice to be together in one place other than school. The beer went down Seth's throat oh so smoothly and tasted great. He wasn't sure how much time had passed but when he went to take another gulp, it was all gone. It just so happened that the cooler was conveniently within arm's reach. He leaned over and grabbed another can.

"You sure that's a good idea?" Ryan asked, his voice soft and tinged with a hint of disapproval.

"Sure I'm sure. Why wouldn't I be?"

"You're not great at holding your liquor."

Seth made a dismissive sound. "That's the old me. The new me can handle it just fine. Okay, dad?"

Though his eyes narrowed, Ryan said nothing more, continuing to sip at his own drink.

Marissa and Summer had taken off on their own tangent, gabbing about some TV show they were both obsessed with. Seth found himself drifting, gazing around at what other people were doing. He looked longingly over at the pool but the topless babes had moved elsewhere. He was fuzzily aware of the fact that a nice buzz was overtaking his brain. This was the happiest he'd felt in quite a while. Who would've thought something as simple as beer could have this great of an effect? Tilting the can up to his lips, he was surprised to find it empty. Well, guess that was that. He thought about reaching for another but Ryan's warning came up like a red flag. The last thing he wanted to do was puke. Maybe it would be wiser to play it safe tonight.

Beer had another sure effect on the human body. Seth stood up, grateful that he wasn't wobbly or dizzy. "I've gotta pee."

As he turned towards the house, he heard Summer's sarcastic voice behind him. "Thanks for that enlightening announcement."

Once inside, he tried asking a couple of people where the nearest washroom was but they were totally clueless. He wandered aimlessly for a long minute or two, poking his head into a few rooms that were inhabited by more partygoers. Not the kind of room he was looking for, though. This was not good. He was beginning to feel a little desperate.

"You need some help?"

He looked down into a pair of clear green eyes. The girl had a friendly face and was smiling up at him.

"Washroom?" he squeaked.

"This way." She grabbed his hand and led him quickly down another hall. Opening the door for him, she stepped aside as he ran in without even thanking her.

A few minutes later, he emerged to find her waiting for him.

"Thanks. You saved my life."

"Glad I could help. I just got myself another beer and thought you might like one." She held out the can towards him. It glistened enticingly with droplets of cold water.

He paused, tempted. "I probably shouldn't."

"Why? Not a big drinker?"

"Something like that."

"Well, it is a party, after all. If you can't enjoy it now, when can you?"

Now, that was an excellent point. Though there was plenty of alcohol at home, he would never dare to touch it. That would just be too risky. Here, however, was the perfect opportunity. Who knew when the next party would come along? Well, in actual fact, there was probably a party going on every weekend but he didn't exactly have his mailbox filling up with invitations.

He accepted the beer. "Thanks."

She grinned approvingly. "You're welcome."

Seth moved to the side as someone came dashing down the hall, making a beeline for the washroom. It was obviously a popular destination.

"You're Seth Cohen, right?"

Taking a gulp of liquid, he nodded. She continued on. "I'm Tanya Bradshaw." Noticing that she had her hand extended, he shook it.

"Nice to meet you," he said.

"We're actually in one class together. History."

Now that she mentioned it, he did recognize her. "That's right. You sit by the window."

"Right." She lowered her voice, as if speaking conspiratorially. "When Jenkins gets particularly boring, I can look outside."

Chuckling, he found himself drawn into conversation with her. She was bright and bubbly, but not in an airhead sort of way. She spoke with intelligence and had an engaging personality. They talked mostly about school and bemoaned the amount of homework and assignments they'd been given lately. He hadn't realized it but somehow in the last few minutes, she had moved closer to him. Close enough that he could see specks of gold in her green irises. Though one hand remained curled around her can of beer, the other reached up to touch the ends of his hair. "You know, I'm totally envious of your hair. I've always wanted curly hair but mine is stick straight."

He regarded her shiny blonde locks. "You're, uh, hair is nice," he said lamely.

"Thank you." As she pressed herself even closer, he took a step back until he was against the wall. "Not afraid, are you?" she teased.

"I just don't think this is a good idea."

"You think too much." With that gentle rebuke, she threw an arm around his neck and launched herself upwards, kissing him full on the mouth.

While one half of his brain was screaming that this was definitely not a good idea, the other half was guiltily enjoying it. Wasn't this every teenage guy's dream? It was a wild and crazy party and he was acting the part.

But common sense soon ruled out and he yanked himself away. "I'm flattered," he said a little breathlessly. "But this is wrong."

She was ever persistent. "You're awfully cute when you blush. I don't remember the last time I saw a guy blush."

She managed to lock onto his mouth one more time before he disengaged himself again. But before he could speak, a shrill voice cut through the air.

"_Cohen!_"

Oh, good Lord. His stomach dropped to the floor as Summer marched down the hall towards them, eyes blazing. "What the fuck?" she spat.

"Um, I think I'll just leave you two alone," Tanya mumbled, suddenly the meek mouse.

"I never took you for a slut, Tanya," Summer said bitingly. "Why don't you carry on and hit on someone else's boyfriend?"

"I didn't know you two were going out."

"Yeah right. Do I have 'fool' written on my forehead? Take off before I pull your dyed, fake blonde hair out by the roots."

Looking positively fearful, Tanya wisely scampered away before Summer could wreak her revenge. Dark, stormy eyes focused on Seth next. "Are you going to say something or just stand there with your mouth open?"

"She...she kissed me. I didn't come on to her, I swear."

She pursed her lips, scrutinizing him carefully. "It looked like you were kissing her back."

Admittedly, he had the first time, but not the second. Summer didn't need to know about the first kiss.

"I wasn't. She kissed me and I was trying to stop her when you showed up."

"I can't believe this. How many times do I have to see you kissing someone else? First Anna, then that chick in Vegas, now Tanya. I need a freakin' score card to keep track!"

He was distracted by an unknown factor in her statement. "What chick in Vegas? I was in Vegas? When was this?"

Summer rolled her eyes in obvious frustration. "It was...a while back. There were these women that turned out to be..." She trailed off and didn't finish the sentence. When she finally continued, she sounded tired. "Just forget Vegas. I don't want to talk about it."

"Why?"

"I just don't! This is too hard."

Now he was confused. "What's too hard?"

"I know it's not your fault you don't remember but I hate going over and over things with you. Some of the stuff is embarrassing and I don't ever want to think about it again but if I have to explain it to you, it's like I'm reliving everything all over."

He couldn't believe what he was hearing. "How is this suddenly about you? I'm the one that lost my fucking memory!"

"Don't yell at me, Cohen!"

Had he been yelling? He didn't think so but he wasn't sure. Realizing he was still gripping the beer can – practically crushing it between his fingers – he tossed it aside. It was almost empty anyway.

When he spoke again, it was in a calm, measured tone. "Have you told your father about us?"

She was caught off-balance by the question from left field. "I...you're changing the subject."

"Sure am. So have you?"

Her admission was quiet. "No."

"Thought so. What happened to the faith you were going to have in us?"

"What happened to you not being a jerk?" she countered acidly. "I haven't even heard an apology yet."

"You want an apology? Fine. I'm sorry I kissed Tanya. In fact, I lied to you before. I did kiss her back the first time. And for that, I really am sorry. But I'm also sorry that you care more about what your father thinks about me than standing up for us. That's really shitty of you, Summer. And I think you know it."

Her cheeks were stained pink to match the flowers on her skirt. "Well, that is just a glowing apology. You're acting like that kiss doesn't even matter! Sure, you said the words 'I'm sorry' but you're really not, are you," she accused. "You probably even enjoyed it. Not that you would admit it to me. Let's face it, Cohen. You and me just don't work. I should have broken off with you months ago when I first thought about it."

Her eyes widened slightly with surprise, as if she hadn't meant for that last sentence to slip through. But it had.

"So let me get this straight. You were insanely pissed off about the way I took off sailing, even though I wrote you that letter that said it had nothing to do with you. But you were going to break up with me because your dad doesn't like me. Is that pretty much the gist of things?"

She seemed to struggle with her reply, as if not sure what to say. She finally resorted to a one-word answer. "Yes."

"Well, that just sucks. Thanks for laying the guilt trip on me for months now. You said it first. Maybe we don't work together."

She gazed at him with miserable, tear-filled eyes. "So that's it then? It's over?"

He swallowed, fighting back his own misery. God, he couldn't believe he was saying this. "I think so."

"But you...I...you said you love me."

"I do. But maybe all this time, I've been in love with the idea of you. Sometimes, I feel like I don't even know you. Maybe the love is just an illusion. I don't know anymore."

He knew the words were hurtful but they were raw and honest. Before the tears could actually spill over, Summer fled down the hall and out of sight.

Forming a proper fist, he punched the opposing wall, disappointed when it didn't crumble to pieces.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

The door lock on the Ranger popped open obligingly with the handy remote key. Yanking the door open, Seth attempted to crawl in.

"Seth! Wait a minute!" called out a voice from behind. Sounding out of breath, Ryan opened the door a little further and stood with his back against the inside panel. "Are you okay?"

"Just splendid. Why, what have you heard?" Despite his best efforts, Seth could not seem to manage the task of getting into the vehicle. Why was the seat so damn high?

"Summer came running out of the house, crying. She basically dragged Marissa away so I guess the night's over." He paused to watch as Seth finally hoisted himself into the driver's seat. "How much have you had to drink?"

"Not much." Seth cursed as he dropped the keys onto the floor mat. When he tried to lean forward to pick them up, his forehead smacked the horn. Startled by the blaring honk, he jerked back and almost fell out the open door. Ryan's steady hand guided his shoulder until he was upright again.

"Not much to drink, huh?" Ryan said, sounding somewhat amused. "How many beers?"

"Three," Seth muttered.

"That's a lot for you." Reaching down by Seth's feet, Ryan retrieved the keys. "Shove over. I'm driving."

In a terribly ungraceful move, Seth contorted his long limbs and plopped himself down into the passenger's seat. He waited for Ryan to utter the next logical question. It didn't take long. "So what happened?" Ryan asked, as he pulled out onto the street.

"Give you one guess."

"You broke up?"

"Ding, ding, ding."

"Wow. I thought you guys were doing okay."

"We were. But Summer wouldn't tell her dad about us so that pissed me off."

"Okay. I can see your point there."

"And then Summer caught me kissing someone."

Ryan winced sympathetically. "Ouch. Just now at the party?"

"Yeah."

"Who?"

"Tanya Bradshaw."

Ryan seemed to recognize the name. "Oh yeah? She's in my English class. Cute."

Seth shot him a look. "That's so not the point. So then we had a huge fight and it's now officially over." His stomach nearly revolted as Ryan came to a sudden, jarring stop. "Would you take it easy?" he implored. "I'm in a delicate condition, here."

"It's a red light. What do you want me to do?"

"Just try not to stomp on the brake."

They rode in silence for the next several minutes. And as each minute ticked by, Seth felt more and more queasy. He wasn't going to make it. "Ryan, pull over. I'm gonna hurl."

As Ryan hastily pulled over to the curb, Seth pushed open the door and retched, emptying his stomach. Once that pleasantry was over, he took a quick glance up and down the sidewalk, relieved to find it void of any witnesses. He felt something prodding his arm and found it was a box of Kleenex that Ryan must have retrieved from the back seat. He wordlessly took the offered tissue and wiped at his mouth, then slammed the door shut. "Thanks. Proceed."

He glanced at the clock on the dashboard. Good. They would make it home in plenty of time to meet their curfew. With luck, his parents would be asleep already and he'd escape any questions. At least something had to go his way tonight.

Had Summer broken up with him or the other way around? She'd said it first. 'You and me don't work.' Those had been her exact words. And she'd been ready to break it off with him months before. Even before he'd left home. So although the decision had been mutual, she'd stepped towards it first.

Great. He didn't know if that made him feel better or worse.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Summer hadn't cried like this since the day she'd seen Seth at the hospital. It had taken her a while to get herself under control so she could speak coherently. Marissa had kept patting her on the back and making consoling noises as they'd walked to her car. Marissa had offered to drive and Summer had thankfully handed her the keys. She probably would have driven straight into the nearest tree.

During the drive, Summer relayed the whole story, starting from the point where she'd seen the kiss. "So first he tells me that she came on to him and kissed him and that he never kissed her back. Then he says that was a lie and that he _did_ kiss her back. I mean, he said he was sorry but he really didn't sound like he meant it."

"That's so crummy," Marissa sympathized. "I can't believe him. So you broke up with him because of that?"

"Well..." Though it would be so easy to say yes, Summer didn't want to lie to her friend. "I did some stuff too so Cohen was mad at me. We started fighting about everything and it was just horrible." She sighed. "Can I ask you a question?"

"Sure."

"Do you love Ryan?"

Marissa hesitated but she answered the question softly. "Yeah."

"Have you told him?"

"Mmm hmm. Why are you asking me this?"

"Just wondering."

"Do you love Seth?"

Summer felt the sting of hot tears again but she blinked them back, determined not to start crying again. "I don't know. Sometimes I think I do but I wish I didn't. I wish I didn't care!"

She wished a lot of things. She even wished she'd talked to her father about Cohen. But it was too late now. Besides, Cohen had proven himself to be just another prime jerk. She was better off without him.

And if that was the case, why did she feel so heart broken?

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

The party continued on in full swing at Justin's house. The host made his rounds, making sure his guests had enough food, liquor and fun. He caught up to one of his best friends out on the patio. "Can I refresh your drink?" he asked.

Tanya glanced up at him and smiled. "No thanks. I'm good."

He took a seat beside her. "I saw Summer running out of here, crying her eyes out. You wouldn't have had anything to do with that, would you?"

She batted her eyelashes at him playfully. "A lady never divulges her secrets."

He laughed. "Well, things worked out even better than I planned. I don't know yet for sure but I think they actually broke up. You must have really done a number on him."

"It wasn't anything drastic. Just a couple of kisses. And even though it was a favour to you, I honestly didn't mind. He's actually pretty cute."

He snorted with disbelief. "Cohen?"

"Yeah. He's got the sweetest brown eyes."

Justin shook his head and reached into the cooler for another beer. Yes, indeed. Even better than he'd planned.

* * *

A/N: All right, go ahead and throw stuff at me. I know you want to. There, feel better? Good. Now that you got that out of your system, I'll gently remind you that every good drama needs some conflict before it gets all better by the end. Okay? Okay. I almost feel like I should apologize for this exceedingly long chapter. I considered breaking it into two parts but it read better as one whole.

I forgot to mention last time a thank you to AshNight2 for letting me know the tidbit about Seth being found in Portland. I found that very interesting indeed.

To those who have been asking about Seth's memory: As much as it pains me to say this, I will not confirm if or when he will regain his memory. You don't really want me to ruin the story outcome, do you? I appreciate the curiosity and in some cases, the quite impassioned pleas, but you'll just have to keep reading to find out (insert evil laugh).

And finally, as always, thanks for your reviews. I especially appreciate the ones that mention certain lines that stood out or any other specifics. Not that you have to mention those things...I just find it especially thoughtful. In any case, I love all my reviewers. You guys are the best!


	13. Of Thoughts And Feelings

On Mondays, Marissa and Ryan shared the same lunch period. He ordered himself a hamburger and fries while she grabbed a tuna salad sandwich. They took their trays outside and found an empty table. This was the first time they'd seen or talked to each other since Saturday night. Marissa was curious about what had happened after she'd left with Summer.

"So, what did you do after Summer and I left the party?" she asked, taking a bite of her sandwich.

"I drove Seth home. He was pretty wasted."

"Can you believe they broke up? It still doesn't seem real."

"Yeah." Ryan pushed the small plate of fries to the far corner of his tray, a silent indication that she should help herself.

She grabbed one and munched thoughtfully. "So how is he doing? Does he remember everything that happened?"

"He had a helluva hangover the next morning but yeah, he remembers everything. He feels bad about what happened. With that Tanya girl, I mean."

"Well, good. He should feel bad," Marissa stated firmly. "That was pretty low."

"He was drunk."

"Like that's supposed to be an excuse?"

As Ryan finished swallowing, he fixed her with a level gaze. "I think we've all done things we've regretted after having too much to drink. Including you. I know I have."

Grudgingly, Marissa conceded his point. In fact, it was partially why she'd decided to drastically cut down on her drinking. She was no stranger to acting like a fool when she was drunk. And while it eased her troubles temporarily, that was the problem. It was only ever temporary. All the problems still remained once she'd sobered up. So perhaps she shouldn't be one to judge Seth so harshly.

"That may be true. But it doesn't make Summer feel any better," she added.

"Did you know Summer's been keeping their relationship a secret from her father?"

"Yeah, she told me."

She understood her friend's reasoning. In fact, things would be a whole lot easier for Marissa if her mother didn't know about Ryan. She still liked to pretend that her daughter's boyfriend didn't exist or that Marissa would miraculously fall in love with one of Newport's own. But no matter how difficult the circumstances, Marissa continued to defend Ryan, ever hopeful that one day her mother would understand. And now, she felt obligated to defend her best friend. "Summer is really close to her dad. Like the way I am with mine. Luckily, my dad likes you. But her dad's never liked Seth. That just makes it hard for her."

Ryan didn't speak right away, as if he was carefully gauging what to say next. But at last, he said, "Put yourself in Seth's place. He basically thinks Summer is embarrassed to be with him. That he's not good enough for her."

Marissa frowned. "But that's not true."

"Maybe not. But I'm just telling you how Seth feels. And he'd probably kill me for telling you this, so don't spread it around, okay?"

She spoke rather indignantly. "Of course not. But Summer should know. It might make a difference."

"But you didn't hear it from me."

"Fine," she said, sounding exasperated. But in truth, she admired his loyalty to Seth. It was an endearing character trait. "Can I have some more fries?"

With a chuckle, he moved the plate of french fries to her tray.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Usually, Seth enjoyed History class. He liked learning about the past and found it interesting to trace the events that led up to today. Sometimes, he imagined that he'd taken the place of one of the global leaders they were discussing. What decisions would he have made? The same or something different? How would that have changed things?

Sometimes, he tended to over analyse things. History couldn't be re-written. Just like he couldn't change what had happened Saturday night.

Thankfully, he'd managed to have a dose of luck when Ryan had driven him home. His parents had already gone to bed and he'd stumbled into his room unseen. He'd spent the better part of the next day recovering in the pool house. Ryan had covered for him, saying they were working on an assignment together.

Seth had come to the conclusion that there were definitely some advantages in having a brother.

Today, he found his mind wandering. He sat near the back of the room, three rows over from the window. There wasn't much to see besides blue sky but nonetheless, it held his gaze. A blonde head turned around and the movement caught his eye. It was Tanya, looking back at him. She smiled and Seth looked away, returning his attention to Mr. Jenkins' monologue.

Twenty minutes later, the bell sounded and everyone sprang out of their seats. As Seth collected his things, he felt Tanya's presence before he saw her.

"Hi Seth."

"Hi."

"I want to apologize for what happened the other night. I didn't know about you and Summer."

Zipping his bag shut, he said, "Forget about it." He took one step forward but she didn't move. "I have another class," he told her.

She nodded, hugging her binder to her chest. "Me too. I just wanted to let you know, I'm planning to have a party at my place next weekend. Saturday. I would love it if you could come. Just thought I'd extend the invite."

"Maybe," he answered noncommittally. Rather than having to brush past her, he cut across the row down the next empty aisle and walked out.

He headed for the stairwell and followed the flow of students down the steps. His heart jumped into his throat when he spotted Summer coming up. He started raising his hand out of pure habit before realizing what he was doing. The arm came back down, fingers sliding along the handrail. Keeping his eyes focused on the top of her head, he hoped he wouldn't trip. It wasn't the smartest thing to do but he wanted to know if she'd see him. Just as she was about to pass him, her eyes found his. They locked stares for a second and then her gaze flickered away. The moment was gone and he continued on to class.

Well, what did he expect? What did he even want? It's not like she was going to flash him a smile and everything would be okay. They'd broken up. They didn't work together. He was a jerk and she didn't have faith in him. She was too good for him. Too popular. Too beautiful. He had to forget they'd ever been together and get on with his life.

Standing just off to the side of the doorway to the classroom, he watched the others rushing in. It would be so easy to skip this class. If he did rebel, what would he do with his time? Sailing wasn't an option, since his boat had apparently been smashed and unsalvageable, hauled to some waste site in Seattle. He wasn't even sure if he'd ever want to go sailing again anyway. There was always skateboarding. But that seemed kind of lame. If he skipped, his parents would be called and there would be a whole interrogation. Would it be worth it?

With a sigh, he dutifully entered the classroom like a good little boy.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Summer stared into her locker, as if it held all the secrets to sweeping away her woes. She couldn't seem to remember why she'd opened it.

"A dollar for your thoughts," stated a familiar voice.

She knew whom it was before turning around. His presence galvanized her into action again and she crouched down to burrow through the bottom of her locker. "What happened to a penny?" she asked.

"Everything's more expensive in Newport," Justin replied jokingly.

Although she'd quickly found what she'd needed, she pretended to keep searching. But he didn't seem to be going away. Standing upright again, she shut her locker and spoke in a rush. "Can I help you with something? I don't like people hovering."

"I just feel bad about what happened on Saturday. I mean, I don't exactly know what happened but I saw you crying. Then you left pretty quickly with Marissa. Just wanted to make sure you're okay."

"As you can see, I'm perfectly fine," she stated, keeping her tone cool. Although he looked sincere enough, she knew he was a smooth talker. She couldn't yet gauge if he was simply trying to be nice or wanted something more.

He tilted his head slightly. "I'm not sure if I believe you, but okay. Did you and Seth break up?"

She thought about lying. She thought about not answering at all. But there was no valid reason to evade the question, so she answered with a short, "Yeah."

"Sorry. I know how that feels. Look, I like you Summer, and I guess I haven't made that a secret. That night we kissed...I thought we might have something. I liked talking to you that night. If you ever want to talk again...about anything, you know where to find me."

And with that, he went on his way. Left alone once more, she hoisted her bag and headed out too.

At least Justin hadn't been pushy about things. Maybe he really was trying to be a friend. She didn't have many of those. Sure, she never lacked for company at school or social events. Everyone wanted to be Summer Roberts' friend. But Summer's definition of a true friend meant one thing – trust. She knew she could trust Marissa. She had thought she could trust Cohen. Looked like she was down to only one friend now.

No one was perfect, least of all her. She understood that. But honestly, Cohen hadn't sounded very sorry about his wandering lips. And then he'd confessed that maybe he wasn't really in love with her. That maybe he was in love with the "idea" of her. What the hell did that even mean? It gave her a headache just attempting to analyse that one. She'd long ago accepted that Cohen was smarter than her. He liked abstract thinking. She liked to deal with cold, hard facts. And the number one fact was that he had screwed up big time.

Outside in the sun, she found herself standing in front of the lounge entrance. For a moment, she was bewildered. Then she realized what she'd done. She'd switched to automatic pilot mode and come here, just as she had every Monday during her spare period. To wait for Cohen.

Annoyed with herself, she spun on her heel and headed for her car.

Earlier, she'd only seen him on the stairs for a second. Maybe two. But in that drawn out space of time, he'd had an almost hopeful expression on his face. As if he'd expected her to acknowledge him somehow. At least, that's the thought that had sped through her brain before she'd forced herself to look away.

She didn't just miss her boyfriend. She missed her friend.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

A lot could change in seven days. Here it was, Saturday again. He had another invitation to a party, just as had last week. Unlike a week ago, however, he was minus one girlfriend.

Seth debated whether to go to this party or not. On the one hand, it might take his mind off things if he could let go and just have a good time. On the other, he might be reminded of the fact that he was there alone, minus said girlfriend, and he'd just spend the night feeling sorry for himself. The second option wasn't particularly enticing.

He then had a brilliant thought. Maybe Ryan would go with him.

Seth went downstairs to search him out. Not in the kitchen. But he could faintly hear the beeps and whistles of a video game in progress.

"Hey," he greeted, sitting himself down on the couch.

Ryan looked over at him. "Hey. Want to play?"

In answer, Seth picked up the other controller. They played for a while. In fact, Ryan beat him four games out of five. In earlier days, Seth would have found that unforgivably humiliating. He really was out of practice. These days, however, he had more pressing issues to deal with.

"Have any plans tonight?" Seth asked.

"Yeah. I'm seeing a movie with Marissa."

"Oh."

"Why?"

"Tanya invited me to her party. I thought we could both go. You know, a guy's night out."

Ryan lifted an eyebrow at him. "Tanya. The girl you kissed?"

Seth felt himself flushing. "Yeah, so? The place will probably be packed. I probably won't even see her. She's not the reason I want to go, okay?"

Holding out a placating hand, Ryan quickly said, "Okay. Down, Seth. I'll talk to Marissa but I make no promises. We uh, haven't had much alone time lately."

All hopes deflated with that last statement, as Seth nodded. "Right. Three's a crowd. Gotcha."

"Come on, I didn't mean it like that."

"Sorry. That came out wrong. It's fine, Ryan. You and Marissa deserve your alone time." He tried a wan smile. "At least one of us should be having some fun, right?"

Although Ryan asked him to play a couple more games, Seth declined and went back to his room. He tried to go back to working on his essay but he pushed it aside. It was mostly complete anyway. He'd wanted to try to improve it, put a little more thought into it, but that was as good as it was going to get. At least today.

In the evening, he sat down for dinner with everyone. Everything was peachy until his father started asking about their plans for the night.

"Movie with Marissa," Ryan answered.

"Oh yeah? What are you seeing?" Sandy asked.

"Don't know. It's her choice tonight."

Ryan shared a look with Seth and they announced, "Chick flick," in unison.

Kirsten looked up from her plate to regard them both. "Speaking as the lone chick at this table, I tend to find that remark derogatory."

Seth jumped to their defense. "It's not derogatory. It's a well-known phrase these days. It means a sappy romance that mostly chicks appreciate."

"I know what it means, Seth." She paused to consider. "Maybe I just don't like women being referred to as 'chicks'."

"Would you prefer 'hot stuff'?" Sandy asked innocently. He chuckled when Kirsten shot him a mock scowl. "So how about you, Seth? Hot date with that chick otherwise known as Summer?"

Placing his fork down, Seth slowly said, "Yeah, about that. Guess I didn't mention it to you guys? We kind of broke up."

"Oh honey," Kirsten said immediately.

Sandy looked surprised. "No, you didn't mention it. When did this happen?"

"Last week."

"Well, I'm sorry to hear that. I know...how much she meant to you."

For the next thirty seconds or so, nothing could be heard except for the scrape of cutlery against china. No one seemed to know what to say. At last, Sandy was the one to break the void. "So are you just taking it easy tonight, Seth?"

"Actually, I was thinking about going to a party."

"By yourself?"

Seth's radar started picking up some parental control signals. "Yeah," he replied, aware of his father studying him carefully.

"Whose party?"

"Just a girl from school. Dad, what's with the twenty questions? You didn't ask whose party it was last weekend."

"Last weekend, you were all going as a group. If you're going by yourself, I'm a little more concerned."

"I don't have to be chaperoned," Seth complained. "I'm perfectly capable of going by myself." He watched with bated breath as his parents looked at one another, not speaking but conversing in a silent mind meld.

When Sandy spoke, it was to lay down some ground rules. "Curfew is still midnight."

Seth nodded, emitting a slight sigh of relief. "Check."

"Do I even have to mention drinking or drugs?"

"I know. Just say no."

"There's one more thing," Kirsten added.

"Yeah Mom?"

She smiled, managing to look both worried and encouraging. "Have fun."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Ryan checked his watch. They had gone to the seven o'clock show so it was still relatively early. As they walked back to Marissa's car, he said, "Seth mentioned a party tonight. Do you want to check it out?"

"Not really." She gave him a flirtatious smile. "I wanted to check out your pool house. Like we planned."

He gnawed at his lower lip, wondering how best to phrase this. "Could we maybe just stop over real quick? Seth went by himself and I just, uh, want to make sure he's okay."

"Why wouldn't he be?"

Instead of addressing the question, he resorted to saying, "Please?"

They had reached her car and got in. Turning the ignition key, she agreed, "Okay. Just a quick look. So where are we going?"

"I was hoping you'd know. Tanya Bradshaw's house."

Marissa's expression turned to one of disbelief. "He went to _her_ house?"

Ryan couldn't help trying to defend Seth. "It's just a party. I don't think he cares whose house it is."

"But still..."

"Yeah, I know. So do you know where she lives?"

Marissa pulled out of the parking lot and turned right. "Luckily, I do. I've been there before. She always throws a good one."

Once they arrived, just as it had last weekend, it took a little while to find a parking spot. They let themselves in through the front door and concentrated on the task of finding Seth. The crush of bodies made it difficult but they slowly made their way through the bottom floor. Then they went out back to the patio. No sign of him.

"Maybe he's upstairs," Marissa suggested.

"Maybe."

As Ryan was about to turn around, something made him look past the patio to the stretch of beach just beyond. A lone figure sat on the sand, facing the water and the darkened sky. It was only a hunch, but he was sure it was Seth. "Wait here a minute."

Ryan approached the hunched silhouette cautiously. "Seth?" he called out. But there was no answer. Perhaps he was wrong. Still, he moved closer. "Seth, is that you?"

At last, the figure began speaking. "You know, tonight could've gone one of two ways. Either I let loose and have a good time. Or alienate myself and wallow in self-pity. Which way do you think it went?"

Relieved to have found him, Ryan replied, "I'll take door number two."

"Give the man a prize."

Seth looked up at him. "What are you doing here?"

Several possible answers flitted through Ryan's mind but he decided to go for honesty. "Checking up on you."

"Ahhh. And what have you found?"

"I'm not sure yet. Do any drugs?"

"Right. I wouldn't know coke from baking powder. I've always wanted to try pot, though. But don't worry, no inhaling, snorting or shooting up tonight. Next question."

"Drinking?"

Seth bobbed his head up and down. "Caught me there. Two beers. Gonna arrest me now?"

"No. But your parents are gonna flip. Seriously, Seth, didn't you hear Sandy tonight?"

"I'm not drunk."

"Maybe not fall on your ass drunk, but you won't be able to hide it. I can smell your breath from here. He's going to wait up for you this time. It won't be like last week when we just got lucky."

"You're really annoying when you're smart, you know that?"

Ryan opened his mouth to respond but was startled by a feminine voice. He hadn't noticed Marissa coming towards them.

"Everything okay?" she asked tentatively.

"Hey Marissa." Seth waved a hand. "Sorry you got dragged into this."

"That's okay. Are you ready to go home?"

"I don't know. I kind of like it here."

Ryan glanced around at the surrounding blackness of night. "It's dark," he pointed out.

"Yeah," Seth acknowledged.

"It's cold," Marissa added.

"Yup."

"So let's go," Ryan finished firmly.

Seth said nothing and Ryan thought he was going to put up an argument. But eventually, he got to his feet and followed his friends towards the house.

Ryan grimaced when he saw Tanya on the patio, moving quickly to intercept them.

"Hi guys," she said brightly, taking in Marissa and Ryan. "Glad you could make it."

"Actually, we were just leaving," Marissa informed her, her tone frosty.

"What? But it's not even nine thirty." She gazed at Seth. "You're not going too, are you? I thought maybe we could talk some more."

"Nah, I'm all talked out," Seth responded, indeed sounding tired. "Thanks for the ear, though."

"Sure." Tanya didn't disguise her disappointment. "Well, see you at school then."

As they left the house, Ryan was trying to come up with a plan. They went to the Range Rover first and without even being told, Seth climbed into the passenger seat.

"I'll drive Seth home," Ryan told Marissa, as they stood beside the vehicle. "Why don't you follow us?"

"Why? Won't you have your hands full?" Her tone wasn't petulant but more matter-of-fact.

"Maybe Seth can sleep it off in my room. I'll just make sure he's okay, then we can still do something."

She sighed. "Fine. I'll follow you."

During the drive home, Seth remained locked in silence. It was as if he'd regressed to how he'd acted when he'd first come home from the hospital. As one who often resisted people's insistence on engaging in conversation, however, Ryan didn't try to pry open the clam.

Marissa managed to tail him all the way home and they arrived at the same time. Into the pool house they went and Seth immediately crashed onto the bed.

"You want some coffee?" Ryan asked, thinking it might help to sober him up.

Seth closed his eyes, one hand resting on his stomach. "No thanks. Not feeling so hot right now. Alcohol and car rides aren't a good combo for me."

A knock on the door startled all of them. Sandy first poked his head around the door, then stepped in.

"Sorry to interrupt. Hi Marissa. I just happened to see you pull up. Kind of early for a Saturday night, isn't it?"

Marissa spoke first. "We just came back from a movie."

"Oh. All of you?" Sandy looked directly at Seth, who had moved into a sitting position.

"Yeah. I changed my mind about the party," his son lied through his teeth.

"And then we came back here to hang out," Marissa said.

The tale was apparently believable enough for Sandy. "Okay, I'll let you get back to hanging, then. Goodnight."

Seth flopped back onto the bed. "Thanks, Marissa. I owe you one," he mumbled.

"Good cover up," Ryan conceded. "But now we're stuck here."

She sat down on the bed. "I know. But now Seth can talk to us."

"Talk?" Seth repeated.

"Yeah. Drinking's not going to solve anything. I know I sound like some commercial but it almost killed me, Seth. It was an accident but it happened."

Ryan was surprised to hear her bring up the subject. It was something she never wanted to talk about.

"I'm not trying to kill myself," Seth protested.

"I know. But you're starting to get in deeper. Trust me, it'll be easier to stop now than waiting until you've gone over the edge."

"I almost remembered something tonight," Seth confessed.

Marissa's eyes widened. "That's great!"

"I said almost. It wasn't a memory. More like...feelings. I was going through some CDs at Tanya's house and got some really strong feelings. Basically, I hated most of them. Pop crap. But then I found a couple that I loved. They seemed special somehow, like maybe I had liked them when I was a kid. I don't know, I can't explain it."

"Maybe it's a sign that you'll start getting real memories back soon," Ryan put in hopefully.

"Maybe." Seth screwed his eyes shut and rubbed at his temples. "I've really blown it with Summer, haven't I. She hates me."

"She doesn't hate you," Marissa said softly. "She's just hurt."

"She's too good for me."

"That's not true," Marissa said emphatically. "Don't talk like that. You two are great together. You just need to work things out."

Once again, Ryan found himself surprised by what he was hearing. Surprised and pleased.

Seth yawned and rolled over onto his side. "You don't mind if I nap here, do you Ryan?"

"Knock yourself out," Ryan said dryly.

It didn't take long before Seth's deep, even breathing signalled that he was sound asleep. Ryan pulled Marissa by the hand to a far corner of the room and kissed her gently. "Thanks for being so nice to Seth. I've been worried about him. And I wasn't sure how much longer I should cover for him. Maybe you really got through to him."

"I hope so. He needs a friend. I know what he's going through. Well, not the amnesia. But the drinking and...screwing something up so badly, you were afraid the person you loved would never forgive you again."

He cupped her cheek with one hand, stroking the fine skin. "I forgave you a long time ago. And God knows I'm not perfect."

"Does this count as alone time?" she whispered.

In answer, he kissed her again, then hugged her close.

* * *

A/N: Thanks again for those reviews. I'm always interested in what you think, good or bad. I'm pleasantly surprised that most of the reviews were positive for the last chapter. And to Silverweaver: you must be psychic with your comment on parental interaction being due. Just a little dose in this chapter.

There's still more to come so stay tuned.


	14. Truth

Seth took his time, idly browsing through the CDs in the racks. The last time he'd been to the mall was with his mom and Ryan before the start of school. It wasn't a place that he otherwise frequented. He picked up a few cases and read over the song selections on the back. There was one CD in particular that he'd seen at Tanya's party. It hadn't seemed to jive with the rest of her collection – he'd actually found it beside one of the portable players set up on the patio – so he was pretty sure someone else had brought it along. Searching out the alternative section of the store, he found it. Yeah, this was the one.

Just as it had hit him during the party, looking at the shrink-wrapped cover filled him with a sense of excitement. He knew he loved this particular CD. Maybe Ryan was right. Maybe it was a sign that he'd start getting his memory back. Closing his eyes, he tried to will it to happen. Of course, it was a wasted effort. Nothing miraculously sprang out of the darkness at him. But he wanted this CD. Acting on impulse, he went up to the cashier and bought it.

Walking through the mall with his new possession, he wondered if he'd previously owned it. He certainly didn't have it at home now and he couldn't remember if it had been part of the stash that he'd thrown away. In hindsight, perhaps he had been a little hasty with the purging. Oh well.

A couple of giggling teenage girls passed by him, their arms loaded down with bags from various designer stores. It made him think of Summer and the fact that he never did make good on his promise to take her shopping.

During school this past week, every time he'd seen her, he'd thought of trying to talk to her. But frankly, he hadn't had the courage to do it. He'd been afraid of how she would react. Perhaps yell at him. Turn her nose up at him. Even ignore him completely. He wasn't sure which imagined reaction was worse.

One thing he did know for sure. No more parties. Or at the very least, no more drinking. He'd had his rebellious fun at Justin's party. The initial buzz had been awesome but the hangover the next day had been hell on wheels. He'd felt like a herd of elephants had merrily danced on his head. Since that night, he'd had a lot of time to analyse his behaviour. Specifically, why he'd kissed Tanya back, and the alcoholic stupor had definitely played a part in it. If he could find the guts to talk to Summer, he'd like to explain it to her. He owed her that much.

At Tanya's party, he had drunk a little less and had managed not to throw up. But the resulting buzz hadn't been as fun as the first overindulgence. And while he appreciated Marissa's pep talk that night, things weren't anything as dramatic as she'd made it out to be. At least, he didn't think so. But he did intend on heeding her advice and quitting before he got in over his head.

Right now, he couldn't wait to get home and play his new CD. Good thing he hadn't tossed his stereo.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Monday proved to be grey and rainy. Like everyone else, Seth chose to eat lunch inside the cafeteria. Yesterday, he'd gone online and downloaded some songs onto his iPOD. Chewing on his sandwich, he unconsciously bobbed his head lightly as the music piped into his earbuds.

He jerked his head back in surprise as the tiny earphones were suddenly yanked away. Looking up, he grimaced with distaste. It was dandy Andy. He had grabbed a hold of the iPOD and was now clutching it in one beefy paw.

"Listening to your crap music again, Cohen?" he sneered.

Getting slowly to his feet, Seth stared at him coldly. "If you want to debate music with me, fine. But put it down." He mentally added the endearment of 'asshole' to the end of the sentence, but didn't actually say it aloud this time.

"You know, sometimes I get real clumsy. Like this." Andy drew his arm back and hurled the fragile device across the room.

"Son of a..." Seth started to shout. They both watched as it arced through the air, Andy with undisguised glee and Seth with helpless dread. With Seth's luck, it would crack someone on the head and as the owner of the missile, he'd be sued for millions. His dad would have a fit. He couldn't believe his eyes when a small pair of feminine hands actually caught it. "Yes!" he whooped.

"Aw, shit," Andy mumbled, in obvious disappointment.

Even more miraculous than the catch itself? The hands belonged to Summer. She looked up with a bewildered expression before finding Seth's wide-eyed gaze. As she walked up the aisle, she continued to keep her hands busy, wrapping the cord of the earphones around the unit.

"Nice catch, babe," Andy spoke first, holding out his palm. "Give it here."

"It's mine," Seth said, with a glare in Andy's direction. "But that was a nice catch."

Quick to comprehend the situation, Summer handed the iPOD to Seth, their fingers touching briefly. "What are you, like, in grade three?" she said to Andy in a condescending tone.

"I can see you two deserve each other," Andy muttered under his breath, looking increasingly uncomfortable.

With one hand on her hip, Summer's eyes glittered dangerously. "That's right. And if you ever call me 'babe' again, I'll gouge out your eyeball with one fingernail and eat it for lunch. Now take off, assface."

Though going slightly red, Andy said nothing further, walking away a little more quickly than his usual ambling gait.

Seth couldn't help chortling at her fierceness. "Wow, I'm really impressed. I was going to say, remind me never to get on your bad side but I guess it's too late for that, huh?"

She shrugged. "I hate mean bullies."

"Thanks, Summer," he started to say, when he felt a sudden rush to his head. A weird sense of déjà vu seemed to envelope him from head to toe.

_He's zooming along the pier on his brand new skateboard, the wind rippling at his clothes. Concentrating wholly on his balance, he doesn't notice the pair of boys coming up behind him. He doesn't even know what has happened. Suddenly he's falling, tumbling onto the unforgiving ground, rolling over several times. Only then does he hear raucous laughter up ahead. Looking up, he sees them high-fiving each other and starting to take off. With his skateboard._

"_Daddy! Those boys stole his skateboard!"_

_He would recognize that voice anywhere. It's Summer Roberts. She's practically jumping up and down to get her father's attention._

"_Hey! You boys!" roars a booming, authoritative voice. Mr. Roberts can sound downright scary._

_Apparently thinking the same thing, the young culprits drop the board and run away. Summer retrieves it and walks back toward him. By now, he is standing shakily, trying his best not to show how humiliated he feels._

"_Are you okay?" she asks._

_He nods, hopelessly tongue-tied and feeling the heat of his flushed cheeks._

_She points to his leg. "You're bleeding."_

_He can only nod again, the sting of the abrasion making him wince a little. His elbow hurts too but he holds it awkwardly, hoping she won't notice._

"_Well. Here." She hands him the skateboard._

_Accepting it, he thrills at the touch of her skin, as their fingers connect for a millisecond. With eyes downcast, he can finally breathe one word. "Thanks."_

"_Welcome. Bye!"_

_Glancing up again, he watches as she races back to her waiting father, long dark hair streaming behind her. Just when he's convinced she's a spoiled and selfish snob like everyone else in Newport, she does something amazing to melt his heart again. One day, he plans to get down on one knee and spill his guts. Tell her exactly how he feels about her. Yeah, right._

_With a disgusted snort, he turns around and limps home._

"Are you okay?"

Seth blinked, trying to shake himself out of the fog. "What?"

At the touch on his arm, he focused on her concerned face. "Are you okay?" Summer repeated. "Maybe you should sit down. You looked like you were going to pass out or something."

"That was either the weirdest daydream I've ever had or I actually remembered something." The more he thought about it, the more he was convinced it was an actual memory. "God, Summer, I think I just got a memory back!"

She beamed, looking genuinely happy for him. "That's great! What was it?"

"You were in it too. You were with your dad at the pier."

Her smile lost some of its lustre. "That must have been a long time ago. I don't remember the last time we did that."

"Yeah, I must have been twelve. No, wait, I think I was thirteen. That's right, I got a new skateboard on my birthday. I was at the pier and some jerks came along and pushed me off. Your dad scared them and then you gave the board back to me. Remember?"

He fervently hoped she would remember, otherwise he was afraid that he'd totally lost his mind. The memory had seemed so real. He could still feel the wind on his face as he sped down the boardwalk. The high-pitched laughter of his tormentors in his ears. The bittersweet ache in his heart as their fingers touched.

Standing here now, he watched the crinkles form on her brow as she swam her way back through her own memories.

"Did you say you were on your skateboard?" she asked, sounding uncertain.

"Yeah."

It took a few stretched out seconds but her brow gradually began to clear. "I think I do remember something. Yeah, I was at the pier with my father. It was probably the last time we ever did that together. I saw a boy on his skateboard and thought he was going way too fast. Then two other boys came out of nowhere and knocked him over." With wonder in her eyes, she looked up at Seth. "That was you?"

"Did you hand me back the skateboard? Tell me my leg was bleeding?"

"That's right. You were so shy and looked totally embarrassed. I felt so bad for you. I can't believe that was you."

It had been almost four months since the accident. Four months of feeling lost and vulnerable, tossed on the sea without a compass to guide him. And finally, he felt like maybe he was heading for home. Forget drinking. Forget wild teenage rebellion. This first concrete memory was like a super drug that shot him straight to cloud nine. Feeling like he would burst from happiness, he grabbed Summer in a bear hug and impulsively kissed her.

He had caught her completely by surprise but to his wonder, she responded to the kiss. He'd almost forgotten where they were until a few whistles and light applause reached his ears. Coming to his senses, he broke away first.

"Sorry," he sputtered nervously. He could see her struggling to maintain her composure.

"I'm happy for you, Cohen. I really am. But this doesn't make everything okay between us."

"I know." Well, it was now or never. "Listen, can we sit down and talk sometime? Hey, it's Monday. Maybe we can meet in the lounge after school?"

"I...I don't know."

"Please, Summer. I really need to talk to you."

She blew out a light breath and at last said, "Okay."

He breathed an internal sigh of relief. It was a start. "Thanks. I'll see you there."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

The bell rang, signalling the end of another class. Finally, just one more class to go and he'd be able to sit down with Summer.

As Seth collected his things, he saw Tanya making her way over to him.

She spoke in a rush. "I know you have a class next but can I talk to you? It's really important."

"You have a class too, don't you? We'll both be late."

"I've been meaning to talk to you all week but I hardly see you. I'll make it really quick, I promise."

Curious, despite himself, he relented. "Okay. What is it?"

"Not here."

He followed her into the hallway. There was less privacy out here but with the change between classes, the noise and activity gave them cover. She looked uncomfortable but determined and as promised, talked fast. "I like you, Seth. I didn't really know you until we talked at my party. You've been going through a really rough time with your amnesia and I feel like a total heel about something I've done. You deserve to know the truth." She paused, seeming to falter a little. "I...the night of Justin's party, when I kissed you? He asked me to do it."

Seth frowned, confused. "Why would he do that?"

"He, uh...he likes Summer. We sort of timed it so he would get Summer to go looking for you when I was coming on to you." Her fair skin was tinged pink as she confessed her sins, gazing at him guiltily.

"That's low, Tanya. I can't believe you would do that. I can't believe _Justin_. Pretending to be all friendly with me when all the while..." Seth trailed off, fuming. "That son of a bitch," he hissed through clenched teeth.

"I'm so sorry. Justin and I have been friends a long time. He's not a bad guy. He's just...persistent, I guess. When he wants something, he goes after it."

"Even when it's someone else's girlfriend."

Tanya put up no defense to that accusation. "I'm just as guilty for going along with it. Anyway, I just wanted you to know the truth. And that I really am sorry."

Although there was plenty more Seth could have said, he chose to remain silent. He wasn't about to say, 'apology accepted, let's be friends' either. Realizing her time was up, Tanya started edging away. "I better go. I hope you work things out with Summer."

After she'd gone, Seth stood there for another minute or so, his mind working furiously. He was angry with Tanya and Justin, but also with himself. For being a shmuck and falling right into their little web of deceit. Justin must have spent some time congratulating himself on how well his plan had worked. Had he already started hitting on Summer?

The halls were starting to thin out now. Just a few stragglers hurried to get to their next class. Seth started to head for the stairwell but stopped. Fuck it. He needed to talk to Summer first. He didn't care if he was late.

First, of course, he would have to find her.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

As others rushed around her, Summer took her time down the hallway. She'd been a little dazed ever since her encounter with Seth at lunch. At least school was over for her now and she just had to wait another hour or so before their talk. She really had mixed feelings about this. The childish side of her wanted to cling to her hurt and push Seth away. The more mature side of her understood that they needed to talk and get things out in the open. Their break up was a two-way street, which meant she would have to admit to her wrongs too. Was she ready to do that? She supposed she would find out.

Her locker was all the way down to the end of the corridor. It was deserted now. Everyone was behind closed classroom doors. Spinning the combination lock, she snapped it open.

"Hi there."

She nearly jumped out of her skin at the sound of the voice above her head. "Justin! You scared me."

He grinned at her. "Sorry. So how are you?"

"Fine," she stated shortly. "What do you want?" While he seemed a nice enough guy, he was starting to annoy her.

"Just stopping to chat and see how you're doing."

"I said I'm fine. Now go away." She quickly finished transferring her stuff and shut her locker.

"Don't be mad. I didn't mean to scare you. I was thinking, since we both have spares right now, would you like to have a drink and talk?"

"No thanks."

"Why not?"

Honestly, he just wasn't getting the hint. "Justin. Listen to what I'm saying. I am not interested in you. Comprende?"

For once, he dropped the charming smile. "You're still mooning over Seth, aren't you? I can't believe this," he exclaimed.

"It's none of your business," she snapped at him.

As she tried to step around him, he moved to block her path. "You know what your problem is, Summer? You've never had a real man."

Disgust curled her lower lip. "Oh, puh-lease! Did it take you all day to come up with that line?" She managed not to wince when he grabbed her arm. "Unless you want me to scream bloody murder, I suggest you take your hands off, dickhead!" Despite her brave words, her heart was thumping rapidly with a surge of adrenalin. If he tried to kiss her, she planned to place a well-aimed kick to a sensitive area. A few bloody scratches on his clean-shaven face wouldn't hurt either.

"Hey!"

The familiar voice echoed down the hall. At the sound, Justin immediately let go of her arm. Summer knew whom the voice belonged to but still, she watched in disbelief as Seth came barrelling towards them, looking angrier than she'd ever seen him.

"Cohen," she started to say.

But he wasn't even looking at her. The heated glare radiating from his eyes was directed solely at Justin.

Justin tried to recover from his surprise and held out a hand. "Seth..."

He never got a chance to finish the sentence. Seth's fist shot out and pummelled him in the jaw, sending him crashing into the row of lockers.

Summer gasped, one hand over her mouth, her ears ringing from the metallic sound. Justin didn't fall but he staggered a little, swiping at his bloody lip. He then launched himself at Seth with full bodily force. The impact sent them both careening against the lockers on the opposite wall. Locked in battle, they tumbled onto the floor, a tangle of punching fists and flailing limbs.

By this time, several nearby doors had opened and two teachers ran to the scene. Their students poured into the hallway with curious fascination, forming a large crowd. It didn't take long for the two offenders to be pulled apart.

One of the teachers, Mr. McKenzie, stood between the boys and clasped each one by the shoulder. "All right, you two. Down with me to the office." He directed his next words to his students. "Everyone else, back to the room. Start working on questions five to ten. There better be complete silence in there when I get back. I won't be long."

Summer trailed after him. "Mr. McKenzie? It wasn't Seth's fault. He was just trying to protect me."

He stopped and peered through his glasses at her. "What do you mean?"

"Well, Justin was, you know, bothering me. And Seth just tried to help me."

Although he hesitated, Mr. McKenzie started forward again. "Better come with me, Miss Roberts. I suppose you're the only witness to this."

He was walking at a clipped pace and she hurried to keep up. Although Seth still hadn't looked at her, she slipped her hand into his. He squeezed it gently, finally met her eyes, and gave her the tiniest hint of a smile.

She wasn't sure if he was thanking her for her gesture of support or simply pleased with himself. Although the fight had been brief, he'd literally come out on top. He was sure to have a few minor bruises but Justin would be the one to have a black eye and a very sore jaw tomorrow.

Although she was mostly shocked by Seth's act, she secretly had to admit, part of her had thrilled to see him jumping to her defense. He was just full of surprises these days.

* * *

A/N: My, my, Seth is getting rowdy these days, isn't he?  
  
To those who have to fight their gag-reflex when Marissa's on the scene: No apologies necessary. Your review is your opinion and I always respect that. No offense taken. Actually, I get quite a laugh out of the remarks (especially the Quaker/Christian/Soccer Mom! Hee!). I can understand why she's disliked by a large majority but for some reason, she just doesn't bother me. Good thing R/M are only playing a minor role in this fic though, hmm?  
  
A special shout out to benzbabidoll for her amazing run of reviews for 13 straight chapters. That must have been quite a marathon for you! As always, thanks to each and every one of my reviewers. I'm really thrilled so many of you are enjoying this story of mine.  



	15. Consequence

Kirsten stood in the parking lot, tired of pacing back and forth. Sandy should have been here by now. Reaching into her purse, she pulled out her cell phone and hit one of the speed dial buttons.

"Hi hon," rumbled her husband's voice in her ear.

"Where are you?" she asked.

He chuckled lightly. "Turn to your left. I'm just pulling up."

"Oh," she said, feeling a little foolish. "Sorry." She swung around, snapping the phone shut. Sandy's car pulled into the spot beside her and he stepped out, giving her a quick kiss. "So tell me again what Dr. Kim said on the phone."

"It wasn't Dr. Kim," he corrected, as they started walking towards the administration building. "It was her assistant. She just said that Seth had been in a fight and that Dr. Kim wanted to speak with us."

Almost an hour ago, Kirsten had been in her office, going over an agenda for a meeting tomorrow. That's when Sandy had called to say the school had contacted him about Seth. They had both dropped everything to come here. She couldn't seem to wrap her mind around the fact that her son had been fighting. When he was younger, he'd been bullied sometimes. She and Sandy had been to numerous parent-teacher conferences back then but as he'd gotten older, the problem seemed to have faded. Or at least, she'd stopped hearing about it, whether it was from Seth or his teachers. But they had never been asked to come in because he'd been in a fight. "This doesn't sound like Seth," she stated aloud.

Ever the practical one, Sandy urged, "Let's get our facts first before we make any conclusions."

They entered the office and Sandy stopped to speak with the woman at the front desk. Kirsten's eyes roamed through the room and she spotted Seth sitting in a row of chairs just outside of Dr. Kim's door. Walking up to him, she quickly scanned him for visible signs of injuries. Other than a little swelling on his cheek, he looked okay.

"Are you all right?" she asked.

He glanced up at her. "Yeah, Mom, I'm fine. Is Dad here?"

"Yes."

"Great," he mumbled.

Just as Sandy came to stand beside her, the door to Dr. Kim's office opened. A boy with a cut lip and a banged up eye came out, followed by a smaller woman – his mother, Kirsten presumed. Although the boy kept his head down, the older woman glared at Seth and shot Kirsten a dirty look as well. Kirsten stepped back to let them pass, a little shocked at the boy's bloody appearance. Seth had done that to him? Why?

Dr. Kim came into view in her doorway. "Mr. and Mrs. Cohen? Come inside, please. Seth, I'll have you join us in a few minutes."

They stepped into her office, the rich wood paneling and dark colours exuding all the wealth and prestige the school prided itself on. Kirsten planted herself in the leather chair, back ramrod straight. Sandy assumed his usual casual posture, looking mostly at ease. She noticed, however, that one of his hands clutched the armrest so tightly his knuckles were almost white. The only sign of any discomfort.

Dr. Kim was the picture of cool, poised perfection. She spoke first and cut straight to the point without conversational pleasantries. "Thank you for coming. I don't think I have to tell you, I'm dismayed and disappointed by Seth's behaviour. He's always been a model student."

"Why don't you start by telling us what happened?" Sandy suggested.

"Usually in cases like this, we have wildly differing stories between the parties involved. However, to the credit of Seth, Justin, and Summer, no one is disputing the facts of what happened."

"Summer was involved?" Kirsten couldn't help interrupting.

Dr. Kim nodded. "Indirectly, yes. This happened during the start of last period. Summer was at her locker and a fellow student, Justin, approached her. He made some inappropriate comments and got a little physical by grabbing her arm. Seth saw this happen and threw the first punch at Justin. Justin then retaliated and they started fighting until two teachers broke them apart. Those are the facts."

"So Seth was merely looking out for Summer. Trying to protect her," Sandy tried to reason.

Dr. Kim looked skeptical. "Given the circumstances, I think Seth overreacted. And even if that were the case, I wouldn't condone physical violence to solve the problem. However, because Justin fought back, I find them equally at fault."

"What about the fact that Justin was harassing Summer?" Kirsten pointed out. "Doesn't that matter?"

"Yes it does. And I've spoken to both Justin and Mrs. Voss about it. If the harassment had been more serious, it would weigh more heavily against him."

"Oh, so my son should have waited until the situation got out of hand and Justin actually hurt Summer?" Sandy said rather bitingly.

Kirsten shot her husband a warning look. She didn't think that line of argument was going to score points with Dr. Kim. And she was right.

The woman behind the desk narrowed her eyes at him. "Mr. Cohen, Seth could have chosen any number of means to deal with the situation. Talk to Justin. Get a teacher involved. But instead, he chose to punch Justin in the jaw and bloody his lip. I will not have that kind of behaviour in my school."

Sandy looked slightly aggrieved at the lecture but he wisely remained silent. Dr. Kim continued on. "But I do understand that Seth has had a difficult few months since his accident. In fact, I had been thinking about calling you in for a meeting anyway. A few teachers have come to me with concerns about him. Nothing overly serious but I'm wondering if you've noticed any changes in him at home?"

Sandy and Kirsten shared a glance before she answered. "Well, he's been more quiet than usual. Less hyper. We were more worried the first month or so after he came home from the hospital but lately, he seems to be doing a lot better. What are his teachers saying?"

"They've also noticed that he's more quiet in class. Doesn't participate as much as he used to. These are only teachers that he's had previously, of course. But perhaps a little more worrisome, his grades have been lower than we'd expect on recent tests and assignments. It's not by a significant amount but I'm afraid it may be a reflection of his apathy lately."

"We did notice they're a little lower," Kirsten admitted. "But he genuinely seems to be trying his best. He has so many other burdens right now, we haven't been pushing the academic end of things as much."

As the Dean of Harbor, Kirsten wasn't sure how Dr. Kim would take that admission. But she seemed to accept it in stride.

"I see. I'm also wondering if there's been any change in his temperament. Does he perhaps fly off the handle a little more quickly than he used to?"

Sandy replied this time, with a question of his own. "What are you trying to allude to, Dr. Kim?"

"I think we all agree that fighting is out of character for Seth. I'm trying to understand if it's perhaps related to the stress he's been under with his amnesia."

"It's possible," Sandy conceded. "He has been more moody. But as Kirsten pointed out, he's improved the last couple of months. He's been happier."

Kirsten decided to add a significant fact. "The neurologist did tell us that sometimes, personalities can change after head injuries."

Dr. Kim pursed her lips, looking thoughtful. "Well, perhaps we should bring Seth in now. I've only talked to him about the fighting. Not about school in general."

She got up from her chair and a few moments later, Kirsten found herself flanked by her husband and son on either side.

Dr. Kim took the reins again. "Seth, I've just been speaking to your parents about your performance in school so far. How do you think you've been doing?"

He looked a little surprised. Clearly, he hadn't expected this to be the topic of conversation. "Okay, I guess."

"Your grades are slipping a bit. Did you know that?"

He shifted in his seat uneasily. "Yeah, I know. I mean, that's what my parents tell me. But it's still early in the year, right? I can try to do better."

"Good. That's the response I was hoping for. I'll be keeping in closer contact with your parents and teachers. I know you can pull those grades up. I'm sure I don't have to tell you how important your senior year is."

"I know," Seth mumbled.

"All right. Now on to the real reason you're in here today. You must know that fighting is not acceptable under any circumstances. No matter how honourable your intentions may have been."

He resorted to nodding. "There will be consequences, of course," she went on. "Usually, there would be an automatic two days suspension from school, as well as a notation on your student record. This would not reflect well on any college application."

Kirsten's heart sank with those words, as Dr. Kim paused dramatically for a beat. "However..."

Now, a little flicker of hope shot through her. A 'however' at this point was a good sign.

"I feel there are extenuating circumstances to grant some leniency, for both you and Justin. It's a first offense for both of you and I know, Seth, that you've been going through an especially rough time. I've decided on one week's detention. This will not go on record. But..." Dr. Kim raised an eyebrow for emphasis. "I suggest you don't go looking for anymore fights. There won't be any leniency the second time around. Am I making myself clear?"

Seth looked up at her directly. "Yes, Dr. Kim. Thank you. And might I add, that blouse looks fetching on you. Red is definitely your colour."

"Seth!" Kirsten admonished.

Dr. Kim's lip twitched slightly; the only sign of any amusement. "So, that's enough from me. Is there anything anyone else would like to add before we call it a day?"

Kirsten shared one more glance with her husband before she spoke. "Just a thank you from us as well. You've been more than fair."

She stood up, relieved the session was over. After she and Sandy shook hands with the Dean, they left the office, Seth trailing behind them. Walking to the parking lot, no one said a word, though Sandy patted his son's shoulder a couple of times.

"Well," Kirsten said, as they reached their cars. "I have nothing planned for dinner. I'll stop for some take out on the way home. What does everyone feel like?"

"Chinese?" Seth suggested.

"That sounds good," Sandy agreed. "Nothing like Kung Pao Chicken to soothe the nerves."

Kirsten fished in her purse for her keys. "Chinese it is. Seth, we'll talk more later."

Sandy opened his car door and motioned for Seth to get in. "I just want a minute with your mother."

After the door was shut, the concerned parents faced each other. "So what do you think?" Kirsten asked.

"Looks like Dr. Kim has a heart after all. I thought suspension wouldn't be avoidable. Schools have zero tolerance for just about everything these days."

"I can't help feeling there's more going on here. I'm sure Seth was looking out for Summer but did you see that boy...Justin's face? Seth was angry. Really angry."

"Mother's intuition?" Sandy gently teased. When she gave him a look and crossed her arms, he said, "We'll eat dinner, then sit down for a talk. Find out what really happened. Okay?"

They went their separate ways. As Kirsten drove, she fretted about what was going on with her son. Distracted, she almost went through a red light and had to slam on the brakes. A little shaken, she decided to plan out the menu instead. Ryan's favourite was mushroom fried rice. She couldn't forget to order that.

And, of course, some Kung Pao Chicken to help Sandy's nerves.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Seth sat in the car, watching his parents converse. He'd been relieved by Dr. Kim's verdict. While punching Justin had felt great, he really hadn't considered the consequences. Regardless, he wasn't sorry. He was probably lucky that Dr. Kim hadn't demanded an apology. If she had, he really didn't know how he would have responded.

Sandy hopped in the car and they were on their way. "We'll have to get some ice on your face," he commented. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah. My hand hurts a little. But don't worry, I made a proper fist and everything."

They were soon caught in some rush hour traffic. Sandy drummed his fingers on the steering wheel. "Has Justin been bullying you?" he asked abruptly.

"No, Dad. It's nothing like that," Seth replied. "Can we save the big talk until after dinner? I'll come clean, I swear."

"Are you still having those lessons with Ryan?"

Seth suppressed a sigh. It didn't seem like his dad was going to let this drop. "No. I've graduated now. Top of my class."

"So it would seem. Okay, we'll talk later."

Once at home, Seth leaned against the kitchen counter while his father made up an ice pack. In the car, Seth had checked out his face in the visor mirror. Not bad at all. His left cheek was red and swollen but the throbbing had dissipated. Tomorrow, if the ice did the trick, it would hardly even be noticeable.

"Here." Sandy handed him the makeshift bundle, consisting of ice wrapped in a dishcloth.

While Seth pressed it to his face, Ryan walked in. His eyes widened at the obvious signs of post-fighting ice pack recovery.

"So it is true," Ryan stated, with a tone of wonderment.

"Maybe. Maybe not," Seth said cryptically. "What have you heard?"

"That you kicked Justin's ass. Sorry Sandy," Ryan added quickly.

Seth couldn't help the smile that spread across his face. "That, dude, is most definitely true. Is everyone talking about it already?"

"Yeah, pretty much."

"I thought you had practice today," Sandy commented.

"It was cancelled. The field was double booked or something, so I got a ride from one of the guys."

"Excellent," Seth said happily. "Then I can give you all the gory details now. Mi casa or su casa?"

Ryan quirked an eyebrow and stared at him. "What?"

Seth started backing towards the side door. "Let's just go out on the deck. We've got time before Mom brings home some grub."

Ryan followed him out and sat on one of the chairs. Seth remained standing, one hand continuing to cradle the soothing chill of the pack against his face, the other gesticulating wildly. "Man, you will not _believe_ the day I had today. Check this out. First, Andy comes by at lunch and swipes my iPOD. Then he flings it across the room. Guess who was there to catch it?"

Ryan shrugged one shoulder and didn't reply but his eyes followed Seth's every move. "Summer! It was unbelievable. So she gives it back to me, tells Andy off. She is so cool. Threatened to eat his eyeball." Seth laughed at Ryan's comical expression of disgust. "Gruesome, I know. Anyway, I'm standing there and lo and behold, I actually got a memory back."

"Hey, that's great!" Ryan grinned. "So I was right, huh? That was a sign, the other day."

"Guess so. It was really weird because it was so...vivid. You know how memories get fuzzier with age. Like, even though my last memories are when I was twelve, everything is still sort of vague. I can't remember details. Know what I mean?"

"Yeah."

"But this memory with Summer. I can tell you what she was wearing. How she smelled..." Seth trailed off, fully aware that he just might have a goofy smile pasted on his face but not caring.

"Was this an R-rated memory?" Ryan teased.

Seth rolled his eyes, though the smile remained. "Buddy, get your mind out of the gutter. We were thirteen."

"Your point?"

"Ha ha. This is my life we're talking about. Not yours. Now, where was I?"

Seth told Ryan everything. The kiss with Summer. Her agreement to meet with him to talk. Tanya's startling revelation. And of course, his fight with Justin. He was getting hyped up about the moment again, demonstrating some of the impressive moves he had made, when Kirsten popped her head out the door.

"Boys! Come inside for dinner."

At the table, Seth gave his parents a drastically edited version of the day's events. Basically, he only told them about the memory he'd regained. Thrilled, they pressed him for details and he gave them generalities about how Summer had helped him retrieve his skateboard. The good news seemed to bolster his parents' spirits and the mood at the table lightened considerably.

Finishing off the last bit of chicken on his plate, Seth got up from the table.

"Not so fast," Sandy advised. "We need to talk."

Ryan hastily shovelled a forkful of rice into his mouth. "I'm done anyway," he mumbled. Pushing his chair back, he took his plate and disappeared into the kitchen.

Seth sat back down, bracing himself for the lecture.

"Your mother and I talked things over while we were setting up dinner," Sandy informed him. "But before we get into all that, we want to know what really happened today."

Kirsten picked up the thread. "Fighting isn't like you, Seth. I know you must have been angry when you saw Justin harassing Summer but was there more to it? Or...do you think it has to do with your accident?"

Seth was confused for a moment. "My accident? Oh, you mean that change in personality thing?" He hadn't thought about that in a long time. "Huh. I never thought of that. Guess I don't really know. But yeah, there was more to it with Justin. He's the reason why Summer and I broke up. Well, most of the reason." His gaze flickered between his parents who were both waiting with curious looks on their faces. He had told his dad in the car that he would come clean so he supposed it was time to 'fess up. "Okay, remember that party I went to a few weeks ago? Summer caught me kissing a girl. We had a fight and broke up. You knew that already. Well, not the kissing part, but whatever. Anyway, today I found out from the girl – her name's Tanya – that it was all a set up. She's friends with Justin and he asked her to come on to me so he could get it on with Summer. Are you following me?"

He paused for breath and to gauge parental reactions again. His mom's eyes were drawn together, causing a deep furrow between her brows. His dad's mouth was parted slightly, a similar crease between his ginormous eyebrows. "Yeah, so, as you can well imagine, I was pretty pissed at Justin. I went looking for Summer and there was Justin, grabbing her arm. And he grabbed her pretty hard. I'm sure it hurt. And even though she was all brave and telling him off, she was probably a little scared. So I just saw red. I mean, I wasn't even thinking about anything. I just wanted to smash his face in. So, uh, that's kind of what I did. And you know what? I'm not sorry. Don't try to make me apologize for it because I won't. Even if you ground me for the next hundred years. I won't say I'm sorry when I'm not. Whether a personality change has anything to do with it, I really have no clue. But you know, if that's what's really been happening to me, maybe it's not such a bad thing. At least I have the guts now to stand up for myself. And I know fighting in school wasn't the smartest thing to do and I'm in deep crapola if it ever happens again. I know that. So don't worry. I don't exactly want to have a repeat meeting with the Dean so it's pretty safe to say, my fighting days are over." Running out of steam at last, he crossed his arms and sat back in the chair.

Silence ticked by for a few seconds before Sandy ventured to ask, "Are you done?"

"Why, you want more?"

"No," Sandy said quickly, with a wave of his hand. "That was very...eloquent."

"So no more fighting at school," Kirsten said.

"Agreed. Does that mean fighting outside of school is okay?" As his mother tilted her head and gave him a look, he smirked. "Kidding."

"You're lucky that Dr. Kim cut you some slack today," Sandy said, his tone grave. "You can't afford to get suspended."

"I know."

"And you need to start working harder at your schoolwork. Get those grades back up."

"Right."

"So you've got detention at school," his father went on. "In addition, you're grounded for two weeks. No allowance for two weeks. No driving privileges. No video games. No TV."

Seth felt that he had to protest a little. "No TV? Dad, isn't that a little harsh?"

"Want to make it three?" Sandy challenged.

"No TV. Gotcha." Seth closed his eyes for a moment. "Wait. Is the lock-down starting today?"

"Of course."

"Okay, I will totally abide by all your rules. I swear I'll even do it without my usual whining and complaining. You just have to grant me one teensy little thing."

"What's that?"

"You have to let me see Summer tonight."

"Are you planning to apologize to her?" Kirsten asked.

Seth nodded at his mother. "Yes. I might have redeemed myself a little today but ever since the party, she thinks I'm this massive jerk. Which, I guess I kinda was. Not that I want you to think this was totally one-sided, because it wasn't. I was mad at her for some stuff too. But she doesn't know about Justin's master plan and we were going to meet after school to talk. So you've gotta let me go over to her house. Then I'll come straight back here. Please?"

His parents exchanged glances as Seth literally held his breath.

"You know where the keys are," Kirsten said at last. "You can drive yourself over just this once."

Seth smiled in relief. "Thanks, Mom. Dad. Really, you guys are the best."

Remembering to take his plate and glass with him, he dumped them in the sink and grabbed the keys to the Range Rover off the hook. He wondered if he should call Summer first but chances were, she'd be home. After what had happened today, he didn't think even Summer would have gone shopping after school. She must have gone straight home.

As he drove, he tried to plan out what he was going to say but found his mind just running in circles. In the end, he decided to just wing it. Be honest and be himself. Whatever that meant these days.

* * *

A/N: A very talkative chapter that may have been boring after the last action-packed one, but oh well. Hope you liked it anyway.

To alexis: The CD Seth picked out will be revealed in a later chapter.

To orange-tide: Mr. McKenzie...yeah, of course that would sound familiar. Whoops. But I swear I picked that name at random. Maybe subconsciously, it wasn't as random as I thought.

To everyone else, thanks so much for the continued reviews. Guess you liked reading about Seth kicking Justin's butt, hmmm? It was fun to write. More to come, so keep reading.


	16. One Knee

Summer carried plates and glasses into the kitchen and her father followed behind, arms laden with containers of leftovers. He placed them on the counter.

"Should I save some...?" she started to ask.

"Yes," Neil Roberts cut in. "Hopefully she'll have dinner later."

Summer nodded, closing up the lids and storing the containers in the fridge. Her step-mom was holed up in her room, a cooling gel mask over her eyes and blinds tightly shut. She feigned a migraine but more likely, she had downed some new pill that didn't agree with her delicate, chemically imbalanced system.

The doorbell rang and she swung the refrigerator door shut. "I'll get it," Neil told her. "You can finish up in here."

It didn't take her long. She could hear voices floating from the front entrance. Curious, she quickly washed her hands and went down the hall. She stopped short at the sight that greeted her.

"Cohen?" she blurted out.

Seth raised his hand in greeting. "Hey Summer. Sorry I didn't call first. I thought we could have that talk now."

"Oh. Okay."

Neil shook the younger man's hand. "Thank you again, Seth. You and Summer should talk. Take your time."

Summer stared in wonder after her father's back as he left them alone. She then turned to Seth, who was still standing there with a grin on his face. "What did you say to him?" she demanded.

"Nothing! He opened the door, invited me in and started going on about how grateful he was that I had been there for you at school. I take it you told him what happened?"

"Uh huh. Well, come on. Let's go upstairs."

They went up to her room and she closed the door. Sitting on the edge of her bed, she patted the space beside her until he took the invitation and sat down next to her. Noting the swelling on his cheek, she brushed it ever so gently with her fingertip. "Does it hurt?" she asked softly.

"Nah. You should see the other guy."

"I did see the other guy, remember? I still can't believe the way you came charging at him. You were, like, my white knight."

"Saving the damsel in distress." He bobbed his head in agreement. "Yeah, I like that."

She had to add something, lest his head explode from self-inflated pride. "Just for the record, I was more than capable of taking care of myself."

"I have no doubt."

"Good. But it was still sweet of you anyway. No one's ever done that for me before."

They were both quiet for a moment, simply regarding each other. Then they both tried to speak at once.

"So I..."

"I wanted..."

They smiled at each other, almost shyly. "You go first," Seth said.

Summer took a breath. "Okay. I wanted you to know that I told my father everything. And not just what happened today. I told him we started seeing each other again after you came back. And that we kind of broke up again. But he was really impressed by what you did today."

He looked surprised but pleased. "So what was his reaction?"

She thought back to their dinner conversation. In a way, it had been like fate. Her father was never home this early. But he had surprised her with take out from one of her favourite restaurants and they'd had the chance to really talk. "Well, at first he was pretty upset. Maybe more about the fact that I hadn't been honest with him. Then when I told him we had a fight and broke up at the party, he was all, 'I never liked him anyway'. Then I told him what happened today with el creepo Justin and how you just slammed the guy and he said, 'Well, maybe I misjudged the boy'."

Seth grinned at her again. "Really? He said that? I actually scored points with your dad. That's awesome."

"Yeah. Except the fact that we're not together anymore," Summer reminded him.

"Right. Except for that."

"So you wanted to talk to me. I'm listening."

He nodded. "Yeah, about Justin. He's not just your average creep. He's more along the lines of Dr. Evil. You know, like in Austin Powers..."

She cut him off impatiently. "I get the reference, Cohen. Go on."

"The guy had a whole master plan involving you, me, him, and Tanya. Did you know they're good friends?"

"Tanya and Justin? No."

"Well, they are. Just before last period, she confessed her sins to me. Get this. Justin asked her to come on to me at that party. Kiss me and whatever. They actually timed it so you would catch us. He did it to cause trouble between us. Make us break up. Then he could have you in his evil clutches all to himself."

Though she'd unwillingly gone over that night's events in her head countless times now, she'd always started from the horrible moment when she'd seen Seth and Tanya in a lip lock. Now she traced her mind back to when she'd been on the patio. Justin had come over and said he was concerned about Seth. That he'd spotted her boyfriend in the house looking overly drunk and maybe she should go inside to look for him.

"You're right. He _is_ Dr. Evil!" she exclaimed, seething. All this time he'd been playing Mr. Nice Guy when he'd really been the villain. "He made it sound like you were in trouble so I'd go looking for you. Son of a bitch."

Seth smirked slightly. "Funny, that's exactly what I said."

She regarded him with some disbelief. "And Tanya told you this? Why?" Now she had to wonder if Tanya didn't have some ulterior motive.

He opened his mouth to speak then paused, as if uncomfortable with what he'd been about to reveal. "Listen. Let's make a pact here and now." Waving one hand back and forth, he proclaimed, "This talking between us is good. Let's go one step further and just spill our guts out to each other. I don't know what's going to happen when we're done but at least we'll be able to say we were honest with each other. No secrets. Can we do that?"

He looked very serious now and she gazed steadily into his dark eyes. "We can do that," she stated at last.

"Good. Okay. So yeah, I was telling you about Tanya. The weekend after Justin's party, I went to another one. At Tanya's house."

She arched an eyebrow as a surge of irritation shot through her. "Oh really."

"Don't freak out, Summer," he pleaded. "I just wanted to go to a party. Any party. I asked Ryan to go but he was doing something with Marissa. So I went by myself. Had a couple of drinks. I, uh, talked with Tanya for a while. But I swear on...on..." His eyes darted around and he pointed towards her bedside table. "On Captain Oats' honour. And you know that noble steed would never lie. Nothing else happened. All we did was talk."

Though she couldn't help being faintly amused, she was careful not to show it. "Uh huh. So what did you talk about?

"A little about school. But mostly about me, actually. The amnesia and everything."

"Did you talk about me?" she asked.

"We touched on that subject, yes," he admitted. "But mostly in the context of how I'd royally screwed up and hurt you and that I was afraid you'd never forgive me."

"Oh," was the only reaction she could muster.

"But it worked out in the end. She started getting to know me and then she started feeling guilty about what she'd done and voila, she confessed to me. But don't get me wrong. I'm not pinning all the blame on Dr. Evil and his sidekick. I'm the one that got drunk and let raging hormones get the better of me. I know I said it that night but you were right, it was a pretty lousy apology. So I'm gonna say it again. I am really sorry about what I did."

She could tell he was being sincere this time. "I accept your apology," she stated, with what she hoped sounded like dignity. Swallowing hard, she bit her lip. She had intended to keep her little secret but since they'd promised to be honest with each other, her conscience wouldn't seem to allow it. "I have to confess something to you now."

"Okay. The floor is yours."

"It goes back to when you took off on your boat. I went to a party a couple of days after. I just wanted to, like, get drunk and party my ass off. Forget you even existed. So I went and Justin was there. We started talking and he was really nice. Then he kissed me."

As she expected, Seth's expression darkened, though he didn't say a word. She rushed on. "I totally wasn't expecting it and I didn't kiss him back. I swear on..." She waved towards the small table. "Princess Sparkle. That's the truth. He even tried to kiss me a second time but I stopped him cold."

"Well, thanks for telling me."

Her eyes narrowed at him. "Was that sarcastic? I can't tell with you."

With a sigh, he briefly closed his eyes. "Sorry. That did sound sarcastic and I don't mean to be. It's good that you told me. I'm glad. It just makes me even more pissed off with Justin."

"I know. Anyway, I wanted you to hear it from me. I wouldn't be surprised if he blabbed about it to you one day, trying to make it seem more than it really was." She shifted a bit on the bed. "So, you next. Tell me something else."

He tapped his lip with one finger, searching for the next tidbit to share. "I bought a CD."

That surprised her. "Oh yeah? You've started listening to music again?"

"A little. Guess I'll have to start rebuilding my collection."

"What CD?"

"That's the thing. I totally love it and I get the feeling it's important somehow but I don't know why. It's by Death Cab for Cutie. 'Something About Airplanes'."

She smiled, shaking her head a little. "It's the first CD you ever bought. That's why it's important. I think you were thirteen or something.

He stared off into space, mouth slightly parted. "Yeah," he said softly. "Yeah, I think I remember! This is great. It's like every time I talk to you, I remember something." His eyes gleamed with excitement. "But how did you know?"

She snorted. "Do you know how many times you forced me to listen to that stupid music? I can probably name everyone in the band too. But I'm glad for you. I was kind of wondering why you had your iPOD today, so this explains it."

"Death Cab," he said again. "Yeah. Cool." Snapping out of it, he patted her knee. "Your turn."

Confession might be good for the soul but it sure wasn't easy. She felt like all the protective layers she had built up over the years were being peeled away, one by one. She spoke quickly, before she could change her mind. "I'm jealous of Ryan. I mean, I was, before. Not so much now."

He stared at her, evidently with confusion. "Ryan," he repeated. "Why?"

"He's the reason you left. I wasn't enough to make you stay."

"Oh. And I guess that made you feel..."

"Small. Insignificant. Not good enough," she filled in.

"Well, if it's any consolation," he said slowly. "I feel like that around you. That I'm not good enough. I'm such a dork and you're so...popular."

She made a face, her voice laced with scorn. "Please, that is so high school. After this year, no one's going to care that I was popular. It doesn't mean anything in the real world." Her voice got lower and softer, as she scrunched the edge of the bedcover between her fingers. "The truth is, I'm really not good enough for you. You're way smarter than me. And your grandfather practically owns this town. Your family is important in Newport. My dad gives people new chins and boobs. And don't even get me started on my step-mom. That's my worst nightmare. That I'll end up like her. Married to some rich guy, popping pills and only pretending to be happy on the outside when I'm really shrivelling up and miserable on the inside."

"Summer, there's no way you're even capable of shrivelling," he quipped.

She gave him 'the look'. After pouring her heart out, he had the nerve to make jokes? He quickly composed a serious face again. "You're not going to end up like your step-mom. You would never do that to yourself."

"How do you know?" she shot back.

"You love life too much."

"That is so lame. That's really your answer?"

"I have no answers. Neither one of us is perfect. But you thinking you're not good enough for me? That's bullshit. So maybe me thinking the same about you is just as idiotic."

She bit back a laugh. Their conversation had taken an almost ridiculous turn, as if they were in competition for who was less deserving than the other. "So you're basically saying we're both idiots."

A dimple flashed at her. 'I guess I am."

"Way to make me feel better," she groused.

"Do you?" he prodded. "Feel better?"

A tiny sigh escaped her as she contemplated the question. "Yeah. A little."

"Besides, what your dad does is important. Don't underestimate the power of boobs."

Finally laughing out loud, she hit him on the shoulder. "You're the boob, Cohen."

He placed a hand on his chest. "No. I'm the brawn," he deadpanned.

Although she rolled her eyes at him, their childish banter lifted her spirits. He could always make her laugh. She had missed this. But something else had been nagging at her ever since their fight and this was her opportunity to find out the truth. Even though she was afraid of what the answer might be.

"I have to ask you something," she said.

"Sure."

"When we had the fight, you said that maybe you were in love with the idea of me. What did you mean?"

"Ahh. Well, you've got to understand that in my screwed up memory, I've only known you for a few months. Yeah, I've always liked you since we were little and I like to think that I knew the real you. But if I'm really honest, that was just my childhood fantasy. That's what I meant by 'the idea of you'. I wish I could take it back but I know I can't. Just believe me when I say the flesh and blood you is way more interesting than any idea of you. Am I, uh, totally confusing you now?"

"No. I get it," she replied. "Are you sure I haven't disappointed you? Wait, maybe I don't want you to answer that," she hastily added.

He gave her a wry smile. "I think we've already established our mutual lack of perfection. Besides, how boring would that be, right? The last thing we want to do is become as plasticized as all the other Newpsies."

Leave it to Seth to give her so much to think about. Until he'd come along, she'd been coasting along just fine. She probably would have been satisfied to become a 'Newpsie', as he'd so aptly put it. Not the wacked out version like her step-mom, but someone who was content to stay at home, occasionally shop and spend the day at the spa, and perhaps host a swanky charity function or two. It would be a safe, cushiony existence. But Seth didn't seem to fit into that equation. She knew how much he despised this community. He'd always told her how much bigger and better the world was out there. That she really needed to expand her horizons. Problem was, that wasn't very safe. She'd always managed to keep those protective layers in place just so. Less chance of getting hurt that way. And though no one would ever dare to accuse Summer Roberts of being a coward, she supposed she really was, underneath it all.

"Summer."

"Hmm?" Jolted out of her thoughts, she gazed down at him. "What are you doing on the floor?"

Down on one knee, he took her hand, eyes beseeching. "I know this is asking a lot but I want us to try again. I finally feel like my life is getting back on track. Things are good at home. Except for the grounding thing, I guess, but I can live with that. Ryan's a great guy. My parents are pretty cool overall. School, well, I've got my work cut out for me but that's okay. I can deal with it. At least I know I won't let people walk all over me. I'm liking music again. Heck, I'm even going to miss video games while I'm grounded. And let's not forget that I'm starting to get my memory back. But the one thing that would make everything complete? It's you. It's always been you."

Her heart felt like it was getting squeezed by a tight fist in her chest. He'd said the same thing to her last year, even if he didn't remember. And just like last year, she felt like crying though she wasn't quite sure why. She was happy, of course, but it was more than that. He was the only boy she'd ever known who'd even attempted to get to know who she really was beneath the surface. And he was genuinely sweet. That was pretty rare these days.

"You know how cheesy that sounds, right?" she asked, her voice sounding oddly thick.

"Like a hunk of cheddar. I know."

"Mmm...more like brie," she teased. "But I like brie. So, okay, let's try this again."

Her breath caught in her throat when he actually lowered his head and kissed her hand. The cheesiness factor just shot through the roof. And she loved every bit of it. "You can get up now," she advised him.

A little wobbly, he stood up, wincing just a touch. "Ow, my back," he muttered.

She laughed at him. "What is this, old age?"

"I think Dr. Evil's fist might have something to do with it."

She reached out to him, one hand on his chest, the other sliding up the nape of his neck. "I know just the thing to make it better," she murmured.

Closing her eyes, she lost herself in the kiss. Lips, warmth and sweetness. The combination made her insides sigh with pleasure. When she finally forced herself to pull away, she added one condition. "Let's take things slow. Okay?"

His dimple winked at her again. "Anything you say, Summer."

* * *

A/N: Everyone say it with me now....awwww....

To famous99: Yes, I could have extended the Seth/Ryan conversation (did exist at one point but got cut) or had more reaction from Ryan but that's the choice I made in the end. Seth has warmed up to Ryan and is now sharing things openly with him. The fact that they are talking freely now shows progression in their relationship. I don't want to hammer the point home. But there will be a little more Seth/Ryan interaction later so you'll get your wish somewhat. As for no one reacting to the fact that Seth's first memory was of Summer, sorry but I see no relevance in that at all. They're happy he regained a memory, period – doesn't matter that it involved his girlfriend. My opinion, of course. But thanks very much for your balanced review. I appreciate the care and thought you put into it.

To everyone else: It's starting to sound repetitive but I mean it every time. Thank you for those reviews. They really make my day.


	17. Yin And Yang

Bored, bored, bored.

It was Day 4 of the grounding and Seth was twiddling his thumbs. Literally. He was flopped on the bed, lying on his back, hands folded atop his stomach and thumbs twiddling away. Staring up at the ceiling, he realized part of the problem was his boring room, sterilized of all posters and memorabilia. Anything that would make it interesting. And as much as he loved his sole Death Cab CD, he was tired of that too. It looked lonely and ridiculous in his otherwise empty CD tower. But he'd promised his parents that he wouldn't complain and so far, he'd managed to keep his word.

He'd finished his homework already and had a short phone conversation with Summer. She was bogged down with homework and had a test tomorrow so they hadn't talked for long. Things were good with them but between detention, the grounding and only sharing a few classes, they hadn't been able to spend much time together. Perhaps that saying 'absence makes the heart grow fonder' would work in his favour. Provided he didn't run off on any unexpected trips, of course.

Since he had so much free time on his hands, he often thought about what had happened on Monday. It had been an amazing course of events throughout the day, ending with him down on one knee in Summer's bedroom. The act had been nothing but pure impulse. Though his brain had kept warning that revealing everything in his heart might not be the wisest move, he'd done it anyway. Risky, yes. But that seemed to be part of the new and improved Seth.

Something else had happened since that day. He'd regained a big block of memory. Strangely, it hadn't been individual moments, like being knocked off his skateboard and buying his first CD. It had been more like a wave washing over him, filling his memory reservoir up to a new level. The black hole of five years that he'd started out with had now shrunk down to about two years. He could remember how he'd spent the summer when he was fifteen. Mostly bumming around doing nothing productive. A few sailing lessons here and there. Nothing all that memorable, really. But he drew a blank at starting school that sophomore year. Nonetheless, it was progress that gave him and his parents hope that he would fully recover his memory. A couple of weeks ago, he wouldn't have been that optimistic. A lot could change in just a short period of time.

Man, this was pathetic. He never thought he'd miss TV and video games this much. Time for a change of scenery.

Padding downstairs, he'd just reached the bottom step when the doorbell rang. He swung open the front door to face a smiling Marissa.

"Hey," she greeted.

"Hey, come in. You know the way." He held out an arm, gesturing towards the back of the house.

"Actually, I came to see you," she informed him.

"Oh?" he said, with mild surprise.

"Yeah, um, I have some of your stuff."

Since he had no idea what she was talking about, he just looked at her blankly. She continued on. "I know that sounds weird but I can explain. Your mom and dad brought boxes of your stuff to my house a few months ago. They said you'd cleaned out your room and asked Caleb to keep it somewhere. He asked me to take care of it, so I did. And I wasn't supposed to mention it to you. Anyway, your dad called yesterday and kind of hinted that you might want the stuff back. If you don't, I'm supposed to donate it."

Seth didn't know whether to laugh or curse. On the one hand, it irked him that his parents hadn't taken him seriously when he'd told them to get rid of his things. But on the other hand, thank God they hadn't listened to him when he'd clearly been irrational and insane.

"You have it with you? In the car?" he asked.

"Yeah. So, I take it you want it all back?"

"Yes, I most definitely do. This may be proof pudding that my parents are wiser than the average parents should be. Don't ever tell them I said that."

Sandy and Kirsten were both still at work, so Seth didn't have to acknowledge their brilliance to them just yet. He seemed to recall there were quite a few boxes, so he went to the pool house to enlist Ryan's help. Between the three of them, it didn't take too long to transfer the load back into the Cohen household.

Seth stooped down to pick up a familiar CD from one of the boxes. "Ahhh, so I had this after all. Now I've got two of them." He held it out towards Marissa. "Here, you should have this. Discover the joys of Death Cab."

She grinned at him. "Thanks but I already have it."

Seth couldn't help it. His right eyebrow shot up as high as humanly possible. "You like Death Cab?"

"Yup. And Rooney, The Clash, Built to Spill…"

Huh. He never would have figured they liked the same music. The world was full of surprises.

She nodded towards Ryan. "But I'm sure Ryan would love his own copy. Wouldn't you?" she teased.

Ryan gave her his patented Atwood look. "Not really."

"Too bad, my man, because it's yours." Seth handed it over. Well, more like slapped it on Ryan's chest, giving him no choice but to reflexively grab onto it. "Expand your horizons."

"I have to get back," Marissa announced, giving Ryan a quick kiss. "Babysitting Caitlin tonight."

"Thanks for bringing this over," Seth said.

She shrugged, as if emphasizing that it wasn't a big deal. "No problem. But it's your parents you should thank. Not me."

"Yeah, well, if any of my Built to Spill CDs are missing, I'll know who to call."

After Marissa left, Ryan helped Seth lug the boxes up to his room. Seth could barely contain his excitement. "It's like Christmukkah, dude. This is so awesome." He knelt down on the floor and started digging through the first random box. With a sudden thought, he glanced up at Ryan. "Have I explained Christmukkah to you?"

"Yeah, I'm familiar with the term," Ryan assured him. "But this is just your old stuff, right? How is it so awesome?"

"I don't know. It's like discovering it for the first time, I guess," Seth said hesitantly, not sure how to explain it. He grabbed a handful of comics and started stacking them on the floor. "I was just really messed up back then. When I cleaned out my room. I hated everything. But I'm starting to get back in the groove now, you know?"

Ryan nodded. "That's good. I can't say I'm a fan of the music but you kind of got me started on the comic books. I've, uh, missed them."

Seth stared up at him. "Seriously? Which ones?"

"Legion mostly. That's pretty cool."

"Yes it is. Okay, so next Wednesday after school we'll go down to…oh crap." He made a face of disgust. "I forgot I'm grounded. How could I forget the fact that I've been bored out of my friggin skull?"

"Well, now you've got your stuff back," Ryan pointed out.

"True." Seth quickly flipped through the growing stack of comics and pulled out a few, holding them up. "Here, you can take these."

"Thanks. Hey, if you want, I can stop by the store next week and pick something up for you."

Though Seth's first impulse was to jump all over Ryan's offer, he found himself holding back a little. Was his brother just being polite or really meant it? "You don't have to do that. I'm sure you've got better things to do."

"I don't mind. I mean, it would be better with you there. Being the expert and all…" Ryan trailed off awkwardly before he got back on track. "But I don't mind," he repeated.

Though it was sometimes hard to read Ryan, Seth didn't sense anything but sincere vibes from him. He was a good guy. "Thanks. That would be great. I forgot how much it sucks to be grounded."

"I've never been grounded," Ryan commented softly, almost as if talking to himself.

Seth found that hard to believe. "Right. Because you were so angelic?"

Ryan exhaled a breath, shuffling his feet and looking oddly embarrassed. "My mom tried a couple of times but it never worked on me. I just pretty much came and went as I wanted. So she just gave up."

"You rebel, you," was the only comeback Seth could come up with. He belatedly realized this was the first time Ryan had ever mentioned his mother.

"Yeah, well…" Ryan smacked the end of the rolled up comics against the leg of his jeans. "I'll see you at dinner. I've still got some more homework to do."

"Why don't you stick around," Seth suggested impulsively. "Help me sort this stuff out. I was actually on my way down to talk to you anyway before Marissa showed up."

"Why?"

"'Cause I was bored."

"Oh."

After a moment's hesitation, Ryan sank down on the floor and started going through one of the boxes. He unrolled a couple of posters. "Are you gonna put these back up?" he asked.

Seth gave them a quick glance. "Uh, not sure yet. Maybe."

They worked in relative silence for the next while. The calm was occasionally interrupted by outbursts of delight as Seth discovered something interesting or Ryan asked him which pile a particular item should be placed in.

"So, have you remembered anything more?" Ryan asked.

Seth shook his head. "No. Maybe tenth grade was so traumatic, I just totally blocked it out." He gave Ryan a sidelong glance. Being grounded, he'd had a lot of time to think. Here was another prime example. Ryan was concerned about his well-being and thus inquired about his mental state. When was the last time Seth had asked how Ryan was doing? That would be…never. Not since he'd become amnesiac Seth, anyway. Sure, he'd resented the guy's presence initially. He'd been ensnared in the only-child syndrome of not having to share anything in his home, including his parents' attention. But Ryan had slowly won him over and now he couldn't imagine life any other way. So maybe it was about time he returned the brotherly favour and stopped being so selfish. A novel concept to be sure but he'd give it a go. "How have you been doing?" he asked.

Ryan didn't look up from the comic he was perusing. "Fine."

Seth folded his long legs into a more comfortable position and turned his attention away from the boxes. "No, I mean, really, how have you been doing?"

Ryan stared at him from beneath his bangs. "I'm fine." He sounded emphatic. A little brusque, even.

"Are you sure? Because we don't really talk. I mean, we talk, but we don't _talk._ And I think that's probably my fault because I tend to be all about me most of the time. Well, maybe all of the time. But I should make some time for you because you've had my back these past few months and I owe you."

"You don't owe me," Ryan muttered.

"But I do. You gave me space when I needed it. Taught me how to throw and duck a punch. Covered my ass with the folks. You've totally been there for me, man. And all without asking for anything in return. I think 'owe' is the wrong word, actually. I mean, I do owe you but it's more than that. I feel like I don't really know you. Sure, my parents gave me the rundown on how you came to live with us and how we were best buddies and I _have_ gotten to know you better. But…I don't know. I guess I want to hear it from you. What was Chino like? What was, what's her name, Theresa like? Are you glad you came back to Newport? Do you miss your mom?"

At Ryan's narrowed gaze, Seth paused to take a breath. Perhaps he was coming on a little strong. The last thing he wanted to do was scare the poor guy away. He already looked like he was ready to bolt.

"I'm not much of a talker," Ryan said, stating the obvious.

"I've noticed. And that's not necessarily a bad thing. I talk way too much but you know, I think we've got a good balance going. Yin and yang. Batman and Robin. Burger and fries." He interlaced his fingers, just to emphasize his point. "We mesh, you and I. Don't you think?"

Ryan snorted with derision but a smile played around his lips. "You're saying we're like a burger and fries? That's kind of gross, Seth."

Seth waved a hand dismissively. "Not my finest example but you get my drift. So let's start with being back in Newport. Are you happy you came back?"

"Yeah, I am but look, you don't have to do this. I appreciate it. Really. But let's just leave it at being happy that I'm back."

Not a satisfactory conversation in Seth's book and he found it difficult to disguise his frustration. "That's it? That's all I get?"

"I've left Chino behind, including Theresa and my mom. I just don't see the point in dragging it all up again. It's ancient history. I'm trying to move on."

"Yeah, but…" Biting the inside of his lip, Seth didn't finish the thought. At least, not out loud. It might be ancient history but it was one he didn't really understand. But once again, he suddenly realized he was being selfish. Ryan obviously didn't want to talk about it and pushing the issue would only be for Seth's benefit.

"But what?"

"Nothing."

"You're upset now."

"No, Ryan, it's okay. I'm not upset. You don't want to talk and I shouldn't push you. I understand." Seth leaned over and lifted more items from the box beside him. It took him a few long seconds to notice that Ryan had moved to sit on the floor with his back against the bed, legs sprawled in front of him. "Taking a break?" he inquired.

"This is me, trying to be relaxed."

Seth lifted an eyebrow, not sure if this was Ryan's attempt at a joke. He said nothing and continued sorting into piles. After about half a minute, Ryan spoke again. "You're right. We should talk. I'm not being fair to you."

"Don't say that," Seth burst out, feeling a spark of annoyance that he knew was absolutely unfair. "For once, I'm trying to make this not about me and you're turning it back around so it is about me. You're ruining the moment, dude."

Ryan held up his hands in a clueless gesture. "What? You've lost me. You don't want to talk now?"

"I do. I always want to talk. But I only want you to talk if it's what you want. Not because you think it's what I want. I've lost you again, haven't I."

"No, actually, I know what you mean. And that kind of scares me."

Seth grinned. "Yin and yang, bro."

"So I want to talk. What is it you want to know first? What Chino is really like?"

Seth set aside his stuff, yet again. Ryan really was one of the most selfless guys he knew. It was obvious he was still doing this for Seth, not because he actually wanted to talk about life in Chino. "You know what? Instead of the past, let's talk about the future. What does Ryan Atwood want to do with his life?"

Looking bewildered with the sudden shift in topic, Ryan asked, "What about Chino?"

"Some other time. Tell you what. We'll start with me first. What does Seth Cohen want to do with his life? How about, he has absolutely no idea."

"Really? No idea?"

"Sad but true. Dad would love for me to be a lawyer. Mom would love for me to go into business. But me? I can't see myself being either."

"Well, what do you like?"

"Not a whole lot. Academically, I mean. I like History but what would I do with that?"

"You could be a teacher," Ryan supplied helpfully.

"And teach a bunch of know-it-all brats like me? I don't know. I like writing."

"Journalism major?"

"Or I could write the next great American novel. Whatever that means." Seth considered Ryan's idea. "Journalism," he repeated thoughtfully. "Guess I'd have to start reading the paper then, huh. But what am I saying? I hate the news. Too depressing."

Silence ticked by for several seconds. "You're a good artist," Ryan said at last.

"Have you ever heard the term 'starving artist'?" As the words left his mouth, Seth was treated to the Atwood look.

"I somehow doubt you would ever starve, Seth."

"Point taken."

"What about comic books?"

"What about them?"

"You like writing and drawing, right? You could develop your own comic."

Seth blinked as he mulled over that suggestion. He'd never thought of that before. Ryan made it sound so logical and easy. Nothing was ever that simple. But yeah, it was an interesting idea. "Not bad, man. You may have something there. So what about you?"

"I, uh, always wanted to be an architect," Ryan admitted.

"Yeah? That's cool. My mom would love that. Maybe you could work for the Newport Group."

"Maybe. I don't know." Ryan picked at his fingernails, looking anything but confident. "It's not something I thought…could really come true. Not back in Chino. But now I'm going to Harbor and so far this year, things are pretty good. Almost too good, you know? Like I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop."

As Seth regarded Ryan, he recognized that what he was witnessing was pretty rare; the figure sitting across from him was actually revealing some insecurities. "Well, stop waiting because that other shoe isn't going to drop. It's staying where it should. On your foot. By the way, when did you get new shoes?" Seth found himself getting distracted by his own tangent and he had to find his train of thought again. "Anyway, give yourself a break. You deserve all the good stuff coming your way. Hell, you've earned it. You're busting your butt in school and frankly, you're making me look bad. But it'll pay off for you in the end."

"Hope you're right. Because Calculus is killing me right now. And that reminds me, I better get back to it."

Before Ryan could get up, Seth held out a hand, motioning for him to halt. "Hang on. What do you say to a quick game on the Playstation?"

"But it's off limits."

"We'll take some comics with us and keep the sound low. When we hear mom and dad come in, we'll just shut everything off and pretend to read. What do you think?"

"I don't know…"

But despite the hesitation, Seth could see that Ryan was tempted. "I know you want to," Seth said coaxingly. "You miss the Playstation. I know you haven't played since I got grounded which, by the way, is exceedingly considerate of you. So this is our chance, dude. A little Ninja action. Yin and yang. Bonnie and Clyde."

Ryan rolled his eyes as he stood up. "Which one of us is Bonnie? Because it isn't me."

Seth got to his feet too, shaking out his legs to get the blood flowing again. "Okay, we'll stick with Batman and Robin."

"I guess that's better than Abercrombie and Fitch."

Seth laughed, remembering to swipe a few comics from the pile on the floor. "Hey, that was actually funny. Nice one."

"Ben and Jerry."

"Okay, you can stop now."

"Bacon and eggs."

Seth headed out the door. Ran, actually. But Ryan was merciless, throwing out random pairings even as they flew down the stairs. "Fish and chips."

"You are so not funny now. I'm not listening," Seth exclaimed, even though he was struggling to keep his composure and not burst into a hysterical fit of laughter. Ryan was not supposed to be funny, just as the Kirsten could not be funny. Those were the rules.

"Mushroom leek crescent and crab and brie phyllo."

Seth couldn't help it. He laughed.

* * *

A/N: So, this chapter is dedicated to all who wanted more Seth/Ryan interaction. Hope you liked it. 

To jadedstyle: You were seriously up until 4 a.m.? I worry for your health and sanity. But I think that may be a compliment, so thanks :-)

I am both pleased and sad to say this fic is rapidly coming to a close. It took a different turn than I'd first intended, thus it won't be as long as I'd first thought. One more chapter will probably do it, I think. As always, thanks for the reviews and sticking with me this far.


	18. Second Chances

_No one gets it. Not his parents. Not Summer. Not really. They say they understand. They say Chino isn't that far away. He can go and visit Ryan anytime. Right. Like that's the same thing. That might not be so bad during the summer but come September, he'll be in Harbor hell once again. Who will have his back? Who will he talk to? Who will he do brotherly stuff with? Yeah, he might have Summer but like he told her at the wedding, it isn't the same thing. She should understand. She has Marissa._

_He's pretending to listen to music, all the while knowing that the official time of Ryan's departure is drawing near. He almost wishes the guy never came to stay with them in the first place. He's used to being a loser. Being alone. Then Ryan entered his Newport bubble and for one year, he experienced an awesome friendship. Only to have it yanked away from him. He wouldn't be in such agonizing torment right now if he never knew Ryan at all. Maybe it's his own damn fault for getting attached to the outsider. That's what he is, after all. An outsider. Just like Seth Cohen._

_Ryan ambles into his room and mumbles, "Hey, man."_

"_Hey," Seth responds._

"_Uh, I've gotta jet."_

_He nods, affecting a detached demeanor. It's easier to pretend he doesn't care, even though he really wants to scream, 'Why? Why do you have to jet? Why do you always have to do the right thing? Be like me and be selfish for once in your life. Can you do that? Huh?' But he says nothing like that, of course. Instead, he nods and says, "Cool. You really gotta go?"_

"_Yeah."_

"_Well, if you need a hand, I'll take the graveyard shift."_

"_I think we'll manage."_

_He exhales bitterly. Even that lame attempt at trying to hang onto their friendship gets brushed off. Right. Sure. He'll just visit Ryan in good ol' Chino anytime. "I was afraid you'd say that."_

"_You can come down and visit me."_

_He nods. Barely. Ryan's just saying the right thing, of course. Throwing his old friend a bone. As if he means it. _

_Silence._

"_Right, so I, uh, got you something. It's yours, you know, it's good for ideas."_

_He glances at the paper passed to him. "Map of Tahiti." He looks to the far wall and tosses it aside. "Cool man." He can't stand the torture. Just leave, already._

_Long, stretched out moment of awkwardness._

_He's barely acknowledged Ryan's presence thus far. This must be achingly uncomfortable for the guy. Good. He deserves it. _

_Seth finally gives in and looks up at him. Their gazes connect._

"_So I'll see you, then," Ryan says at last._

_He puts the earbuds back in place. "See ya." With hands folded in his lap and eyes focused into the distance again, he pretends Ryan is dismissed. See ya. Have a fucking great life._

_Then he's alone once more._

_He sits there, not moving, music pulsing through his ears. That's it then. Welcome to your Ryan Atwood-less life._

_He rips out the earbuds with one hand, grips the iPOD unit with the other and prepares to hurl them both across the room. At the last second, common sense prevails and only the white cord of the ear phones sail through the air. Hardly satisfying._

_With his right hand, he grabs the map and heaves it with all his might. It lands with a soft thunk on the floor._

"_Fuck!" he yells, feeling only marginally better._

_He realizes he's behaving like a two-year-old. Well, maybe except for the swearing. Ryan will probably never want to talk to him again._

_Sliding off the bed, he retrieves the map. Stares at it. Stares through it. An idea starting to brew in his brain. It's something he should have done a long time ago. He just never had the guts to go through with it. But now, nothing is stopping him. He'll do it. Tahiti has always been his dream._

"_Thanks, Ryan."_

_XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX_

_Something's wrong. He's always talked about this. Planned for it. Dreamt about it. Now, he's actually doing it. Out on the ocean with a compass and map to guide him. He should be ecstatic, right?_

_The salty breeze rifles his hair as he tries to figure out what's bothering him. He's only been on the open water for an hour. He doesn't regret the decision to leave. In fact, he feels giddily carefree. He'll go back eventually. But for now, he just wants to ride out the waves and pretend his Newport life doesn't exist. So what's his damn problem?_

_Tahiti. Alone. The '_Summer Breeze_'. He must be fucking insane. Sharks. Storms. Even the relentless rays of the sun. Who is he kidding? He'll never make it alive. And the purpose of this little getaway isn't to kill himself. But that's exactly what will happen if he continues on this crazy course across the Pacific Ocean. So what now? He's not ready to go home yet._

_He consults the map. Checks his compass. Swings the sails around until he's heading back towards the coastline. _

_That's what he'll do. Sail north up the coast of California and beyond. See how far he can get. He's always wanted to visit Washington state. It's supposed to be beautiful up there._

_As he bobs up and down with the waves, it lulls him into a dreamy state. His mind starts to wander and he finds himself thinking about Summer. Despite the letter he wrote, he worries that she'll take his absence hard. Take it personally, even though his leaving had nothing to do with her. Maybe he should have told her face-to-face. Hell, no maybes about it. That's what he should have done. It's what Ryan would have done. But he took the cowardly way out._

_Because he would have taken one look at her and crumbled. He wouldn't have been able to leave. And he has to. He has to get away or he'll lose his mind. _

_He prays that one day, she'll understand. And forgive._

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That's the last memory that Seth had regained a week ago. Since then – nothing. The flashbacks had been coming back to him fairly quickly and then just seemed to stop cold. He talked it over with his parents and they told him that often with head injuries, memories just prior to the incident are never recovered. But in his case, he couldn't seem to remember anything past setting out on the first day of his adventure. What about the whole month that he'd sailed up the coast? What had he done? It was all a big mystery. Frankly, it just annoyed him that those memories seemed out of his reach. He could only hope that someday, it would all come rushing back to him.

It was rather ironic, actually, that he had changed course to keep himself safe and yet it hadn't seemed to make any difference. He'd still managed to smash his boat and his head along with it. It tended to freak him out when he thought about how close he'd really been to getting himself killed. Life had granted him a second chance and so had Summer. He couldn't afford to mess things up again. Not that he'd never make mistakes, mind you, but he'd try his best. That's all he could do.

It had been almost three weeks since the grounding was lifted. A month since he'd last seen the detention hall. Though they would never be friends, Justin had actually apologized to him on the last day of their forced confinement. And although Seth still considered the guy to be an asshole, perhaps it wasn't with a capital 'A'. He remained on speaking terms with Tanya but just in a 'hi, how are you' type of way. No more in-depth conversations and definitely no more going to parties at her house. Although she wasn't an evil person by any means, he didn't want to get any closer than that. At least, not anytime soon. She seemed to understand his unspoken feelings and kept her distance.

But the main reason for his happiness the last few weeks was the memories he'd regained since the time of Ryan's entrance into the Cohen household. His father's impulsive act had been the catalyst for literally changing his life. Ryan had become a best friend and brother. And while he'd heard about this miraculous event from his parents and even Summer, he'd never really got it. Never fully understood the significance of it until he'd actually remembered everything that had happened last year. Now he felt like a total shithead for how he'd treated Ryan after coming home from the hospital. And yet the guy had never given him any grief about it. But that was Ryan.

One other thing to be grateful for where Ryan was concerned? In a roundabout way, he had led to Seth's involvement with Summer. Now he remembered everything that he'd been through with her too, in vivid colour. Their first kiss, the Anna fiasco, the Vegas mess, the misunderstandings and the fierce, undeniable attraction. He imagined their souls were like magnets. No matter how far circumstances pulled them apart, they managed to find their way back together. Summer would accuse him of being cheesy again and rightly so. But he knew that deep inside, she would secretly agree with him.

As per Summer's wishes, they were taking things slowly. Talking on the phone, hanging out at school whenever they had the chance, even reverting back to video game nights at his house. The last couple of weekends they'd went to the movies – still her choice, of course. And yesterday, he'd finally made good on that promise to go shopping with her. They'd gone to Fashion Island and the day hadn't been that bad, really. Maybe because he'd spent a good portion of the time quietly mocking people. She had rolled her eyes at him at first but then got into the spirit of the game herself. While he had always prided himself on his mockability skills, he had to admit she was right up to par, matching his verbal shots with her own caustic brand of wit and humour. All the more reason to love her.

Today, they were planning on heading to the pier for some dinner. It was late afternoon and the house was eerily quiet. Ryan and Marissa had gone out somewhere. Sandy and Kirsten had left a half hour ago to an obligatory dinner party at his grandparents' house. Well, his grandfather and Julie's house. Even though he'd almost fully regained his memory, he still couldn't think of Julie as his grandmother. Besides, he was pretty sure she didn't appreciate the thought either.

At the sound of the doorbell, he tossed aside the comic he'd been perusing and ran to the door. Summer beamed up at him and they leaned in for a quick kiss.

"You're early," he commented, drinking in the sight of her. She was wearing the new dress he'd helped pick out yesterday. That wasn't entirely true. He hadn't actually picked it out, per se. He'd merely given a thumbs up sign to indicate it was a keeper when she'd flounced out of the dressing room. Approximately one quarter of the twenty-five outfits she'd tried on had ended up on her father's credit card.

"Yeah, I had to get out of the house. The step-monster is off her rocker today. More so than usual, I mean. Okay, I have a surprise for you. Close your eyes."

Only at that command did he notice she had one hand behind her back. "Oooh, what is it? A new video game? Pudding? A CD to add to my collection? Just please don't let it be Jessica Simpson."

Summer's lips pursed out, one corner dipping downwards. "Hey, don't diss Jessica. She's a lot better than Looney."

"Rooney."

"Whatever. No, smart-ass, it's none of the above. Just close your eyes and hold out your hand," she demanded impatiently.

He did as he was told and felt something with a cool, smooth surface being pressed into his palm. His fingers reflexively curled around the object. It felt oddly familiar. "Can I open them now?"

"Yes."

Looking down at what he held, his face broke into a grin. "Hey! Captain Oats!"

"I thought you might be missing him. I think he's been a little homesick."

"Is that right, buddy?"

He thought he was past talking to plastic horses but apparently old habits died hard. He motioned for Summer to come in. "It's still early. We'll hang out here for a bit."

They went up to his room. While he set the Captain down in his rightful place, Summer sat down on the bed. "It seems quiet," she observed. "Your parents aren't here?"

"No. Over at my granddad's."

"You weren't invited?"

"It's an adults only thing. That means lots of wine and boring conversation. My dad was coughing and pretending he had a sore throat but my mom dragged him out of here anyway. He needs to work on those improvisation skills."

"They're really sweet. Your parents."

She sounded almost wistful but he had to scoff. It was his duty. "Please, they're my parents. No sweetness there. Uh uh."

"You're full of it. They _are_ sweet and you know it. But I get it, they're your parents, so I guess that's kind of ew for you. But when I'm that old and married, I hope we're still that much in love."

He stared at her, not sure of his footing on that particular statement. "And when you say 'we', you're talking about…?"

She swung her head around to regard him directly. "I'm speaking metaphorically, of course," she said crisply.

He raised an eyebrow, not sure which was more weird – this entire topic of conversation or the fact that the word 'metaphorically' so easily rolled off her tongue. "Yeah, okay," was the best response he could come up with.

Her gaze slid away and glanced around the room. "So this is looking better. Did you put all the posters back?"

"Yeah. Even the ones that were in the undecided pile. I might change things around a bit later but for now, it's basically back to the way it was."

"Put on some music," she said abruptly.

"What?"

She flushed slightly, looking almost uncomfortable. "I mean, would you please put on some music?"

"Uh, sure."

What in the world was wrong with her? She was definitely acting strangely and it was rather unsettling. He started walking towards the CD player.

"No!" she burst out.

Coming to a halt in mid-stride, he stared at her. "Not the CD," she said, lowering her voice. "The record player."

"Why?"

"Just do it, Cohen."

Her request had a pleading tone to it. With a half shrug, he turned it on and set the needle in place. As the music came to life, she got to her feet.

"What's going on, Summer?" he had to ask.

"Now you can ask me to dance."

"Okay." Wisely deciding to take the hint, he held out his hand. "Would you dance with me?"

She quickly closed the distance between them and nestled into his arms. He said nothing for almost a minute, which was probably some sort of record. "Didn't you think this was cheesy last time?" he asked softly. Not that he minded the slow swaying in time to the music. But he was still curious.

"Yeah," she murmured. "But I also kind of liked it. Remember?"

He nodded. He actually did remember, which was saying a lot. A month ago, he would have been asking her to tell him what had happened. She continued on, her voice so quiet, he had to strain to hear her over the music. "I liked kissing you and dancing with you. I didn't understand why. I couldn't explain it, even if I tried. But that night, when you asked me to dance? That's when I started falling in love with you. The funny thing is, I didn't know it back then."

She'd been resting her cheek against his shoulder but now tilted her head up to look at him. "What I'm trying to say is…I love you. I'm just sorry it's taken me this long to say it. I'm, like, the biggest coward ever. But now you know the truth."

He was stunned. If he wasn't holding on to her, he might have fallen straight to the floor. "Summer, God, I don't know what to say except…I love you too."

An expression of uncertainty flashed across her features. "Do you? Do you really? Not just the idea of me?"

He mentally cursed himself, wishing those words had never escaped his lips. "No, honey, I love everything about you. Just forget I ever said that, okay?"

She smiled, running one hand up his neck to tease the base of his curls. "Say that again."

"Which part? I love you?"

"Well, you can say that too. But no, the part where you called me 'honey'. You've never called me that before."

"Did I say that?" He honestly couldn't recall. Maybe he was experiencing selective amnesia now.

"You did."

"Okay, hon…"

The endearment became muffled when Summer eagerly threw both arms around his neck, pulling his head down for a full-on, open-mouthed kiss. Since agreeing to take things slowly, their kisses could best be described as chaste. But this, however, was anything but. It at least rated a 10.5 on the Richter scale.

When they finally came up for air, she took his hand and started walking backwards, leading him towards the bed. "Are you sure? What about taking it slow?" he asked.

"It's been slow enough. I'm ready for the mambo now." She grinned at him, her tone sly and teasing. Her dark eyes had that come-hither look that had been haunting his dreams lately.

But he wanted to be absolutely sure he wasn't getting his signals crossed. "You mean the horizontal mambo, right?"

She rolled her eyes. "Ye-ah!" The word was stretched out into two syllables, Summer-style. "I like the slow dancing but I'm not about to fox trot with you. Let's have sex, Cohen."

"You're so romantic," he said dryly. Not that he cared, really. He'd always admired her way of getting right down to it. "Wait a second." He stopped, as a sudden thought came upon him.

She pouted. "What?"

He couldn't help the slow smile that spread across his face. Dipping his head down, he whispered into her ear. "I remember where hot spot number two is."

Covering her mouth with one hand, she giggled and swatted at his arm. "Seth Cohen," she exclaimed.

While she pretended to be shocked, he could see the excited gleam in her eye. Probably because it was the mirror image of what reflected from his own eyes. With a mock growl, he pounced on her. She emitted a half-squeal, half-laugh, as they tumbled backwards onto the bed.

As he leaned in for another kiss, he was struck by another stray thought. He was happy. Truly happy. His life wasn't all that bad, really. Not perfect, but what was? What he had right here, right now, was pretty damn good. And he had no intentions of wasting his life the second time around.

THE END

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A/N: sigh> So that's all, folks. Thanks once again for hanging in there 'til the end. Special thanks to those reviewers who mentioned they liked the characterization and dialogue in this fic - two elements of writing that I'm kind of picky about so when it's praised, it really means a lot to me. I wish I could say I have another fic I'm working on but alas, that's not the case. Hopefully my muse will hit me soon.


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